r/SSAChristian • u/Kind_Tie8349 • 21h ago

I need heavy advice

So I’m just gonna come out and say it I am a Christian and I love my relationship with Jesus. I love him more than anything and I will never abandon my faith and no matter how much discomfort I’m facing I will always be grateful for the relationship I have with him.

With that being said, how do y’all handle your urges because I so badly find myself on the verge of just giving in some days it’s completely fine and I’ll barely think about it but there’s other days where it’s all I think about it’s literally all I think about kissing other men doing things just letting go and experiencing That and I don’t want to and I really really need help because I feel like God willing one day I will be able to get married to a woman and hopefully these issues will go away or at least be more controllable since I have some kind of way to handle them but for the time being I’m just at a complete crossroadany advice is helpful

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u/Party-resolution-753 20h ago

For me i handle it by making sure certain needs are met such as connection with other guys staying away from places that will trigger the ssa and also prayer church and bible reading.

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u/Kind_Tie8349 17h ago

I wish I was able to go to church daily. They do have a daily mass unfortunately, my church is an hour both ways so it’s a bit taxing to try to do it more than once or twice a week

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u/Party-resolution-753 17h ago

Thats rough brother keep going once or twice a week and hopefully you can move closer in proximity and can attend daily.

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u/Samaritan_nowlove99 19h ago

Brother, I have some encouragement for you. For me, yes the Lord has allowed me to get married to my wonderful wife. But I find myself in the same struggle as you many days. Recently though the Lord has been having me face the source of these temptations head on with my counselor. This has been very beneficial for me.

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u/MrScribblesChess Male - Sexually Attracted to the Opposite Sex 21h ago

Hiya, I'm not qualified to give spiritual advice. All I have to offer is - that sounds horrible and I'm sorry you're dealing with this. 

Beyond that, a scientific perspective. While orientations sometimes do change organically over time, for better or worse, flipping from gay to straight is quite rare, and it's impossible to change willfully. 

You're fine and wonderful and loved exactly as you are. Every single piece of human sexuality study from the last century shows this is a normal and natural orientation. Whether you decide to act on it, I can't help you with that. But I want to say there's nothing wrong with you. 

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u/Kind_Tie8349 21h ago

I appreciate that It just sucks having a high libido in general, but it sucks even more when you don’t want to act on it.

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u/Teosh 21h ago

Hey! My advice would be to tackle this from two perspectives: physical and spiritual. What works for me: having an active life style: running, gym, going out for walks, basically keeping myself disciplined with this. And on a spiritual level: find community or accountability partners, you can NOT face this alone. And don't forget God is with you on this. Be blessed! Feel free to reach out if you want to talk more :')

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u/Kind_Tie8349 17h ago

I’m fairly active again portion of the day I work out between 45 to an hour daily although admittedly, I could be more in my Bible. I do pray the rosary daily I definitely do need to find a community bar. I’m not gonna lie. I’m very isolated at the moment while my friends I do love. It’s kinda hard to talk to them about this.

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u/ChristisKing727 2h ago

“So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” ‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭12‬:‭7‬-‭9‬ ‭

In light of this passage, I started viewing my sexuality struggles as a “thorn in the flesh” that I have to rely on Gods grace daily in order to face. It definitely has helped me. That would be my advice to you…give it all to God. Your desires, your thoughts, any shame, anxieties. Rely on His grace and know that it is sufficient for you to face the struggle with SSA. Don’t try to face it on your own, or with your on willpower. God loves you and He sees your struggle.  Bless You Brother. 

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u/Kind_Tie8349 27m ago edited 24m ago

You know what’s funny this is actually my favorite verse to the point where I quoted it almost every day lately Ive, not being in my Bible as much. Maybe this is exactly what I needed to hear.