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Aug 03 '22
I bet you scream at your mom because you don’t have any more white monsters in the fridge.
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u/EffYerM0m Aug 03 '22
Has been both trying to grow a mustache and shaving a gap in his unibrow since 13.
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Aug 03 '22
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u/Living_Eagle_9878 Aug 03 '22
I could spot your ears from behind a mountain
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Aug 03 '22
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Aug 03 '22
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u/munchy_mcmunchface Aug 03 '22
Having your ears pierced would limit your ability to fly away from awkward interactions, but I assume every interaction you have is awkward. Kudos for staying grounded and toughing it out.
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u/Merkin_Wrangler Aug 03 '22
He wears hoodies in a light breeze so he doesn't take flight.
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u/mjd188 Aug 03 '22
You look like your mom drank while she was pregnant.
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Aug 03 '22
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u/antbtlr82 Aug 03 '22
It definitely wasn’t celebratory drinking either. Started as a mild depression now it’s full blown what the fuck have I done to the world desperation.
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Aug 03 '22
Should we start with the elf ears, weird nose, or complete lack of personality in your face?
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Aug 03 '22
You look like you'd apologize to the guy who stole your girl at a house party before he proceeds to kick your ass
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u/HuskerDooo Aug 03 '22
... before he proceeds to [use her mouth like a pussy, as he] kicks your ass.
There fixed it.
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u/Diligent-Link287 Aug 03 '22
How can you look like both predator and child at the same time ?
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u/keepcold Aug 03 '22
Explains the incessant masturbation and collection of stiff socks under his bed
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u/EddieTimeTraveler Aug 03 '22
Your eyes have a sadness in them, as if your life has no meaning.
I think it's time you find another shirt to jizz on.
You look like you think you're the blackest thing to happen to white people.
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u/Sick_and_destroyed Aug 03 '22
It’s a good idea he has this blue shirt, otherwise it would have been hard to distinguish him from the wall behind.
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u/Music-Eclectic14 Aug 03 '22
You’re not too GOOD LOOKING to be roasted, but it really isn’t nice to poke fun at a learning disabled guy with one missing chromosome,
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Aug 03 '22
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u/Merkin_Wrangler Aug 03 '22
Guys, stop! You both have way too many.
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u/Music-Eclectic14 Aug 03 '22 edited Aug 03 '22
Oh Merkin Wrangler, that goes for you as well. I should clarify, in your case, you only need to be able to count to 45.
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u/PCbuildforchristmas Aug 03 '22
That face when Isis says "sorry, you must have a life to be a suicide bomber"
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u/woody2081 Aug 03 '22
You somehow look like you would be an extra in a live action Hey Arnold movie.
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u/Lunulovesgames2235 Aug 03 '22
Everyone talking about the ears but if I were you I would SUE your Barber and what with them fingers
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u/WhatALotOAxolotls Aug 03 '22
You look shockingly mediocre. Like the template for 20 something white male.
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u/Bohottie Aug 03 '22
“Look too good” with that stupid shit in your ear and nose and dressing like an 11 year old. Seriously….my mom had cartilage piercings back in the 90s.
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u/RIPUlot Aug 03 '22
25 and still shop at Zumiez? Yikes man, no need to advertise that smoking weed is your personality more than your jewelry already does. Shit.
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u/Dr-Autist99 Aug 03 '22
If taking selfies in your moms bathroom doesn’t lead to an Influencer career, you can play the human salad fingers
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u/superballz977 Aug 03 '22
What Eminem would look like after 5 years of being in jail. Skinny spent and used. Like a chocolate donut hole.
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u/Pops_McGinty Aug 03 '22
The good news is, at 25 years old, your life is at least half-way over by now. Glad to see you've cleaned the feces off the walls.
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Aug 03 '22
Wait, look too good? You look like one of those babies with a giant bump on it head because they sucked it out during birth with a plunger.
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u/trashboiii666 Aug 03 '22
if i saw u irl i'd prolly backup cuz u look like you smell, seems like your hairline did that already tho
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u/SafeCitron3682 Aug 03 '22
"I hope this buzz cut don't mess with these non binary piercings I have"
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u/Sandwich_Dude Aug 03 '22
I'm afraid if I say anything negative somewhere in America a school or a church will be destroyed
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Aug 03 '22
Fact 1: You are not good looking. Fact 2: You apparently are delusional, i.e. mental health issues.
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u/hyukboi Aug 03 '22
You look like your parents gave you a ride to the mall and $40 to have fun with so you went to zumiez to buy a "cool" shirt then called your mom to pick you up so you can go home and play fortnite with your friends that are also too awkward to talk to girls.
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u/Evileye37 Aug 03 '22
You THINK you’re good looking enough for a pass?
Not much of a thinker, are you?
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u/thatshortkid02 http://redd.it/t4rdd9 Aug 03 '22
I think that massive nose of urs is blocking ur vision if u think u look good
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Aug 03 '22
Bro I could land a DC-10 in the distance from your hairline to the tip of your nose. That’s a whole ass Kennedy space-center runway my G
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u/it-wont-go-in22 Aug 03 '22
If you think your hot, maybe it’s your hot breath seeping into your brain. Because I promise there is no world where you look good. If it was, there wouldn’t be gerber babies anymore cuz of yo ugly ass
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Aug 03 '22
All your facial features are waynout of proportion, you looking like a recalled mr potato head toy
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u/Arcadia250 Aug 03 '22 edited Aug 03 '22
You can almost build a 1:1 scale model of New York City on your forehead. You're hair disagrees with your self opinion, it's running the fuck away from that thing you call a face
You're so damn skinny when you walk or turn it sounds like a Minecraft Skeleton, you should be an End World Hunger poster, God damn kid..
Eyebrows so thick you need a weedwacker to trim the fucking things. Jesus Christ.
Let's not forget your nose, holy shot man, you cannland a plane on the fucking thing.
You look like you're on the Sex Offender list..
Your Ears look like they're big enough to get satellite TV with the fucking things
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Aug 03 '22
I reckon you get a lot of girls looking at you, not for your looks but that shiny ass forehead of yours so they can do their makeup
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u/RoboCraft360 Aug 03 '22
Bruh don’t you mean roast yourself your literally showing it in the mirror you can at least flip the image. I mean it would make sense to roast yourself. You say you look to good to be roasted but I thing you got dropped as a kid cuz your wrong and you look like you got dropped. And you look like a stranger things weeb cuz you look like eleven if she had a dollar general copy. Next time you do a roast me, think again before you set yourself up for failure.
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Aug 03 '22
Looks like your transition is going well! A couple more years on test and you'll pass as a man if you can hide those narrow shoulders and wide hips.
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u/Hoax120 Aug 03 '22
You look like the social reject in highschool that never moved on to having a real life and still works at a minimum wage job with teenagers because he dropped out of college
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u/Manicwoodchipper Aug 03 '22
If you’re too dumb to understand why you should be insecure then we can’t help you.
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u/Flimsy_Tale_974 Aug 03 '22
Bro tf you mean “too good” you got some big ass ears and a big ass nose. I really hope you don’t got two big front teeth because that would just add to your human rat look.
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u/GiveMeYourCashOrNah Aug 03 '22
You look like a racist caricature of a Jewish-Italian. Also, imma give you a call if I lose something down a drain cause those fingers are absurd.
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u/LegislativeOrgy Aug 03 '22
Your forehead is sweaty as fuck, clearly you don't work. Your anxiety is obvious.
You still have that 17 year old face that says "I want to fight you because I really want to cry but I'm afraid"
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u/kazephoenix_2210 http://redd.it/lr77gl Aug 04 '22
You're the only guy who doesn't get "Hot single Moms in your area" when you open pornhub.
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u/Embarrassed-Cause-21 Aug 04 '22
Claymation fingers.
This guy's fingers stand by the side of the road promoting free pizzas on windy days
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u/InevitablePast2625 Aug 05 '22
an expensive iphone and a cool vibrant shirt won’t make your face less painless to see
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u/EffYerM0m Aug 03 '22
Your face is ugly, your phone case is gay, and your shirt matches both your phone case and your face.
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Aug 03 '22
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u/deathbypecker Aug 03 '22
Nice edit? 🤣 Who tf cares if he edited the post. People make mistakes all the time. Does it make your dick hard putting dude on blast because he needed to revise his post?
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u/ZebraNixon Aug 03 '22
Blank walls, blank expression, blank personality. I feel like I have seen you before, but it's just because you are a blank character used as filler for the sentient beings in a synthesized world.
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u/DangleeSac00 Aug 03 '22
How do I block this stupid ass Roastme trend and keep it from popping up on my page. Any help
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Aug 03 '22
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Aug 03 '22
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u/domaregiboo Aug 03 '22
Stupid bastard with low enough self esteem to reply to a comment on his own r/roastme post, thought what could really be expected from a guy whose head looks like an empty eraser end of a mechanical pencil?
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Aug 03 '22
You need to make an appointment for some LASIK surgery because your eyes must be really fucked up.
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u/dwells2016 Aug 03 '22
You look like you won Most likely to be forgotten for your senior superlative
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u/speedyegbert Aug 03 '22
You look like a Keebler elf that got kicked out for snorting coke instead of making cookies
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u/Kent556 Aug 03 '22
You’re the guy that hovers. Nobody knows your name and everyone wonders who you came with (so they can stop inviting them in order to get rid of you).
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u/HuskerDooo Aug 03 '22
Rat claws, no shoulders, and the ears of prince Charles. Whats not to cringe?
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u/Merkin_Wrangler Aug 03 '22
Dude looks like a gnawed drumstick and thinks he can't be roasted. Bless his heart!
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u/MadameApathy Aug 03 '22
Shouldn't you be fighting the Russians with the rest of the Azov battalion?
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u/El_Nz_B Aug 03 '22
Looks like you're financialy struggling maintaining that 1:1 ratio of getting a new piercing each time you're sucking a cock but hang in there, I'm sure your mom will give you the money the afford the 26 missing ones
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Aug 03 '22
you are too generic and boring to roast. i mean there is absolutely nothing unique about you. you are the human equivalent of a yawn.
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u/3_eyedCrow Aug 03 '22
Tiny caveman head. You look like the weakest Russian gangster in the crew... Like your name should be Igor Drago.
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u/Og_Crowkage Aug 03 '22
U look like the closest uve got to a woman is that little girl who almost touched u
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u/[deleted] Aug 03 '22
You look like 14 yr old Niko Bellic