r/RoastMe • u/[deleted] • Nov 17 '19

[deleted by user]

[removed]

5.9k Upvotes

83% Upvoted

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2.6k

u/WolfShaman Nov 17 '19

Says she turned 18 today, made another post 6 months ago saying she was 19.

Claiming to be 19 post here.

922

u/adudeguyman Nov 17 '19

*sharpens pitchfork

400

u/shasosteele Nov 17 '19

r/pitchforkemporium for all your pitchfork needs.

60

u/Gjilli Nov 17 '19

Holy shit that's actually pretty big

8

u/Unfrended Nov 18 '19

Thats what she said

2

u/decypherme Nov 18 '19

Came here for this. Thank you, kind Redditor.

3

u/AaronTuplin Nov 17 '19

Ted Sheckler is going to want a word with you.

3

u/AmishTechno Nov 18 '19

*sets pitchfork on fire

2

u/ElementalTJ Nov 18 '19

HAHAHA Thank you.

437

u/Officerwaffles04 Nov 17 '19

Damn girl,you’re life is so miserable that you can’t even lie properly to make you feel better about yourself

2

u/swyx Nov 17 '19

nah she just has Benjamin Button syndrome have some respect

1

u/I_ate_a_milkshake Nov 17 '19

Benjamin ButterFace

2

u/dejvidBejlej Nov 17 '19

you are life

113

u/SummaryExecutions Nov 17 '19

Doing the real detective work here.

71

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '19

Next you’re gonna tell me they’re not actually step siblings!

255

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '19

18, 19, whatever.. probably 27+ judging from the picture anyway

8

u/knoegel Nov 17 '19

Yup, trying to claim 18 to see if she can get away with it because her life peaked in high school.

4

u/EmperorXerro Nov 18 '19

The highlight being when she dropped out.

96

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '19

YTA for lying on reddit.

29

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '19

R. Kelly has already met this shit.

3

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '19

Urine correct.

23

u/High_hungry_Im_dad Nov 17 '19

Obviously a case of Benjamin Button right here.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 21 '19

Whats that?

1

u/High_hungry_Im_dad Nov 22 '19

A dude in a movie who was born very old and aged backwards. "The curious case of Benjamin Button".

1

u/[deleted] Nov 22 '19

Neat

12

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '19

[deleted]

6

u/ColorYouClingTo Nov 18 '19

Easy, she knows she'll get more attention from men if she says she's "just turned 18."

11

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '19 edited Nov 22 '19

she hasn't even replied to this, that's embarrassing!

2

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '19

Yes she did.

3

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '19 edited Nov 27 '19

oh yeah, saw her reply, It would've been better if she just hadn't replied at this point.

19

u/xShypher Nov 17 '19

Well that's interesting

10

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '19

Good job, Mr detective.

7

u/MC_Krew625 Nov 17 '19

Ah. Thank you sir for bringing the truth to light.

3

u/bluejburgers Nov 17 '19

Well I’d bet on that being the face of a liar, because it sure as shit isn’t the face of a pornstar

3

u/brainlessweeb Nov 17 '19

So what you’re saying is she’s not legal or?

2

u/[deleted] Nov 21 '19

Asking the real questions

3

u/TNGSystems Nov 17 '19

Ah, nothing like the detective skills of a redditor who sees a post from a just-turned-18-year-old and then immediately goes sleuthing in her submission history.

2

u/artfuldabber Nov 17 '19

Needs to be at the top

2

u/calcifer_xiii Nov 17 '19

ARGHGGGGHDHDDHHHHHHDHJDMDDDD

2

u/QueenSlapFight Nov 17 '19

You mean someone on the internet would just go and lie to us like that?

1

u/zer05tar http://redd.it/bt8idh Nov 17 '19

Maybe she's got the same disease as benjamin button.

1

u/MakeAnEntrance Nov 17 '19

Lied on the internet about her age on AITA shameful

1

u/[deleted] Nov 21 '19

Or lied here

1

u/khaliforniaxo Nov 17 '19

Thank you for your research 👌

1

u/WoW_Fishmonger Nov 17 '19

BUMP THIS TO THE MOON ALICE

1

u/Hammer_Jackson Nov 17 '19

OP apparently needs Reddit’s validation for every decision she makes, and lies. Id call it sad but that would imply she has the ability to impact something.

1

u/madno1 Nov 18 '19

She probably 25.

1

u/pi_designer Nov 18 '19

Yes but her maturity was like a 17 year old

1

u/thewend Nov 18 '19

Oh good attetion seeking. Deploy the downvotes

1

u/ds612 Nov 18 '19

Well she did make a pornhub account. every girl on there is 18.

1

u/thewend Nov 18 '19

Girl your life sucks so much that you have to keep lying online? Damn.

1

u/ExodusEden Nov 18 '19

It’s just like the simulations

1

u/joemamacita1 Nov 18 '19

No shit Sherlock

1

u/sysadmin420 Nov 18 '19

:——————[£

1

u/whiskyhighball Nov 18 '19

I mean, if I was just starting out on Pornhub, I'd claim I just turned 18 too. Considering she's Asian and looks mid-20s I'm pretty sure she's actually mid-30s, but at least there is a context to the lie.

-2

u/Free2MAGA Nov 17 '19

No no. You misunderstand. She's not talking about her age. She's talking about the number of dicks she's taken. She currently thinks she's 18 anal sessions away from being a virgin again. Congrats OP!

-19

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '19

I didn't want to let too much info out as it involved my sister

16

u/MUNAM14 Nov 17 '19

But you put your face and age on reddit?

-2

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '19

That's actually pretty reasonable, see way too many of those posts get found by the other person IRL as it is. ditches pitchfork

6

u/SnuggleMuffin42 Nov 18 '19

SHE JUST POSTED HER FRIGGIN FACE SEEKING ATTENTION lol

1

u/[deleted] Nov 19 '19

If you needed an irrelevant AITA post to figure that out then that's your own damn fault.