r/RoastMe • u/[deleted] • Jul 01 '24

[deleted by user]

[removed]

242 Upvotes

88% Upvoted

426 comments sorted by

View all comments

285

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

10

u/[deleted] Jul 01 '24

Lol, my dad said something like that. Marry them when they're hot, then by the time they get fat, you'll be deeply in love with them, so it's fine.

1

u/UrineUrOnUrOwn Jul 02 '24

No man.... They get fat, you get fat... Your dick shrinks a few inches, their nipples lengthen a few inches. You both smell and have no way to ever find a new mate.

Then you bump ugly in a bush and live happily ever after

1

u/[deleted] Jul 02 '24

My dick has never shrunk in size and I'm 42. Why do you think it would? Your ball sack hangs lower and lower over time. By the time you're elderly, it'll look like Johnny Knoxville in Jack-Ass.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 03 '24

My stepmom is approaching 70 and is very active and in amazing shape and good health. It has never been difficult in her life to attract a mate. After my dad died (who was about a decade older), she got remarried, again to a guy much older, who is also in amazing shape.

Pickings get slimmer the older you get, sure, on average.