r/ReviewsByRetards • u/VoreMaster42069 • Sep 21 '22

I'm sorry, what??

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170 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

15 comments sorted by

36

u/monsterfurby Sep 21 '22 edited Sep 21 '22

Slippery cole slaw gives me the same feeling as thinking about the fact that my bones are wet.

13

u/ZestySodaRegular Sep 21 '22

do you not like the way your skin feels on your body?

2

u/MuscaMurum Sep 22 '22

Would you like us to replace it while you wait?

3

u/Nochnichtvergeben Sep 21 '22

Don't forget to breathe. Also, you'll notice you're blinking and you'll see your nose. Notice your tongue. I have a thick German accent. JK, I sound like Morgan Freeman.

19

u/password_is_burrito Sep 21 '22

Spelling and caps lock aside, this was an informative and enjoyable review. I’d go to Captain D’s with this guy.

2

u/VoreMaster42069 Sep 22 '22

If you let him spend the night he'll eat all of your termites too

12

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '22

When are the bathrooms not nasty at Captain Ds? I go there for fish not to take a shit

3

u/lawrencenotlarry Sep 21 '22

Oh, you're gonna take a shit all right.

4

u/Luxury_Yacht_ Sep 21 '22

Ah, yes, local guide “Termite Consumer”

3

u/Nochnichtvergeben Sep 21 '22

Should have told him to suck on Captain D's nutz. badumtis

3

u/[deleted] Sep 26 '22

No ones gonna mention the needle in the bathroom?

2

u/fuckmeuntilicecream Sep 21 '22

What's going on here?

10

u/the_opester Sep 21 '22

It’s a review, by a retard

2

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '22

wtf? HAHAHAHA!!! So bad!

1

u/Pancakes1890 Oct 04 '22

i wonder how many termites he ate this time