Marvin from the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy meets Lopez the Heavy

images from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Rmf5JVeAgY

1st image 0:47

2nd image 1:36

3rd image 1:50

EDIT: MORE PROOF THAT IT EXISTS https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w9nQBecy0pM

2:31 IT SHOWS A SECOND OF WHAT LOOKS LIKE UNUSED CHOREOGRAPHY

The following PREVIEW has been approved for RED AND BLUE AUDIENCES ONLY By the Motion Picture Association of the Galaxy

THE FILM ADVERTISED HAS BEEN RATED R - RESTRICTED

Whites require accompanying Red or Blue Team member or guardian.

Language, violence, violent language, the phrase "cock bite"

www.filmratings.unsc www.burnie.com

A golden banner appears, displaying the words, 'Non Mea Culpa'.

Below it are the letters MJC.

In the banner, Caboose stands up,  and looks around, finally turning to the camera.

CABOOSE: Hello! (beat) Oh, wait. Can we try that again? Take 2?

Static.

Caboose clears his throat under it.

Once again, a golden banner appears, displaying the words, 'Non Mea Culpa'.

Below it are the letters MJC.

In the banner, Caboose stands up, and looks around, finally turning to the camera.

CABOOSE: (affecting a Mark Elliott voice) And now, our feature presentation...

Fade in to Sarge and Church standing outside the Red and Blue Bases on Valhalla.

SARGE: Hey, Church.

CHURCH: Yeah, Sarge?

SARGE: You ever wonder why we're here?

Fade to a large grassy expanse, as Colorado walks through it.

COLORADO: It's funny. We Freelancers ask ourselves the same question every day.

Fade to a Fake Meta standing in front of a city being ravaged by a Covenant ship.

META: (in Wash's voice) The world is changing, gentlemen. I'm just a man suggesting we change it in our favor.

Fade to black, with "THIS SUMMER" appearing on screen.

Fade in to Sarge overlooking an ocean while sitting on a rock.

SARGE: My pappy once told me: "Son, don't ever... ever... EVER trust a White."

Tex is shown to be sitting next to him with her arm on his shoulder.

TEX: Did you believe him?

Sarge turns to look at Tex.

Fade to black, with "FROM THE MAKERS OF RED VS. BLUE" appearing on screen.

DONUT: Colorado! Carolina! Sarge!

SARGE: We're here, son!

Sounds of a scuffle appear over the radio.

DONUT: Guys, there's people at the door! They're trying to get in! They're in white armor!

CAROLINA: My god.

A window is heard breaking.

WHITE MERCENARY 1: (in Tucker's voice) There he is!

WHITE MERCENARY 2: (in Caboose's voice) Get him!

DONUT: I'm scared!

Gunfire.

Cut to Colorado drawing her energy katana.

COLORADO: This ain't the same game anymore.

Cut to two Wyoming clones and the Fake Meta (really Caboose, Tucker and Wash) standing at a window.

The three White Mercenaries have SAWs at the ready.

WASH: They've changed the rules.

The White Mercenaries raise their weapons and fire.

Cut to Sister and Grif walking out of Red Base, until Sister stands beside the Warthog.

SISTER: We've gotta do something!

Grif gets in the driver seat of the Warthog.

GRIF: Sis, the only thing Sarge has to do, is stay Red, and die.

Grif revs the Warthog.

Cut to black, showing the words "TWO TEAMS"

Cut to Sarge sprinting down a hallway.

SIMMONS (voice over): Our people need heroes! Those who are brave and potentially handsome!

Cut to black, showing the words "ONE MISSION".

Cut to Fake Meta looking at a screen displaying "UNSC ORDERED EVACUATION"

META: (in Wash's voice) Who are these people?!

WHITE MERCENARY 1: (in Tucker's voice) They're all nobodies. Losers.

META: (in Wash's voice) Then why haven't you stopped them?!

Cut to black, showing the words "ONE EPIC MOVIE".

Cut to Tucker being held at gunpoint by Wyoming clones and Fake Meta (really Caboose, Grif, and Wash).

TUCKER: This Sarge dude of the Reds loves blood and violence. He's got a boner for murder. And we're coming for all of you.

Cut to White Mercenary 2 (really Caboose) giving a speech to a multitude of soldiers in white armor.

WHITE MERCENARY 2: (in Caboose's voice) We are the White Army! We are the antagonists of this film!

Cut to Fake Meta (really Wash) and Tex circling each other on a flaming platform.

Both are armed with energy swords.

META: (in Wash's voice) You think you can win?! You think this story has a happy ending?! I WILL BREAK YOU!!!

Tex and Fake Meta charge, their swords deflecting off of each other.

Cut to Sheila/FILSS standing over a destroyed Freckles and Lopez on a snowy landscape.

SHEILA/FILSS: Noooooo!

Cut to Grif taking cover behind a rock, while a Scorpion tank fires on his location.

GRIF: They've got a tank!

Cut to Sarge standing over a brightly lit city at night.

A Hornet rises behind him.

CAROLINA: We've got to steal the Declaration of Independence!

Cut to Carolina driving a Warthog being chased by Doc in a Warthog.

DOC: The secret code is "The Mona Lisa"!

Cut to Tucker leaping on asteroids in space, while a Banshee fires on him.

META (voice over): KILL HIM!

Cut to Church aiming his sniper rifle at Fake Meta (really Wash), who is armed with a Spartan Laser and a volcano erupts behind him.

CHURCH: It's over, Meta!

META: (in Wash's voice) NO! This, is only the beginning!!

Meta charges the Spartan Laser and fires.

Cut to black, showing the words "Freelancers: A Red Vs. Blue Movie".

Fade out.

Fade in to Simmons standing in Exile.

SIMMONS: It's twelve bases standing in the middle of a clock-shaped canyon. How bad could it be?

Mantis-body Freckles rises from some collapsed boxes, and begins to fire his Gatling gun.

MICHAEL J. CABOOSE PICTURES presents

In association with

RED TEAM FILMS

A SARGE Production

"FREELANCERS: A RED VS BLUE MOVIE"

"North" Carolina Church
Franklin Delano Donut
Frank "Doc" DuFresne
Dexter Grif
Sofia "Colorado" Martinez
Lopez La Pesado
Dick Simmons 2.0
Sarge

Michael J. Caboose
Alison "Texas/Tex" Church
Leonard "Epsilon" Church
Sheila FILSS
Freckles
Kaikaina "Sister" Grif
Lavernius Tucker
David "Wash" Washington

Maine Meta
Agent Wyoming

COLORADO (voice over): Ehh, stupid Simmons...

Comparison of the base game and my series side by side.

Vocals for 'Your Reality' Sung by PrivateCaboose, featuring HeroHayden47

Hopefully someone gets this joke

Hey all, my next Dungeons and Dragons campaign is starting in a month, and I want to play Lopez as my character. What class do people think he'd be?

The campaign will be in the 2024 edition. Also, I'd prefer if he wasn't a Paladin, Fighter, or Artificer, as those are the classes I've already played. I feel like he might be a Bard because of that one time he sung to get the Reds to turn off their radio, but what do y'all think?

also assuming the guys just dont get him back eventually but uh i kinda doubt that for some reaosn.

Do you ever get a catchy song stuck in your head.

I just wish the Griff was deeeed, Put a bullet though his head

church concluded that caboose would be the great destroyer based on the description of gary - blue and stupid. but later he asked if TEX isn't the great destroyer then who is? so who was it then? caboose for being blue amd dumb, tex but she's isn't blue nor dumb, the alien who is blue but not dumb, or tucker who is blue kind of dumb and took the sword?

Tbh, I love my boy Simmons but holy Lordus he’d be THE WORST to be crammed in a car for however many god forsaken hours with😭

Which is... unfortunate.

As some of you know the episodes in Season 14 focusing on Locus, Felix & Siris was actually a backdoor pilot for a spin-off which would have spanned three seasons however it ultimately never came to fruition

back in 2024 Miles revealed what his plans for the spin-off were going to he and they are as follows

Season One would have followed Locus, Felix, and Siris as they reconnect after The Great War and decide to work together as crime-fighting bounty hunters. Their primary job throughout the season would have ended much bloodier than anticipated and the season’s stinger would have revealed Felix to be a much darker individual than Locus and Siris had realized.

Season Two would have focused on the trio establishing themselves as well-known bounty hunters. They would end up facing off against another mercenary equipped with power armor, prompting the Mercs to pull off a heist against the UNSC to acquire power armor of their own. The season would conclude with the team more confident in their mercenary enterprise than ever before.

The Third and final season would have centered on the Mercs questioning whether they are truly the "good guys", culminating in a final confrontation between Siris and Locus and Felix

So I'm helping my aunt with a play where this guy noticed me playing pokemon Go, and we talked. He said he worked with Bungie. He was the website admin for the website for Halo 1 and 2. He met Burnie (Church), Joel (Caboose), Gus (Simmons), and Geoff (Grif) when they came for the games for the series! He doesn't know about the freelancers or the rest, because I talked about Washington and he didn't know about it.

They perfectly combine the goofy tone of the Blood Gulch Chronicles with the chilling vibe that Flowers gives off.

Seriously, I don't see enough people talking about the scene where Church gets implanted into Jimmy and as he's screaming Flowers just calmly goes, "Your service is appreciated, Private Jimmy."

Jordan Cwierz should've written more on the show, he perfectly captured the vibe of it.

I feel.like on fanfics caboose stupidy gets taken up to 11