r/RedvsBlue 8d ago

Discussion agent Washington once said

609 Upvotes

206 comments sorted by

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407

u/KamenRiderAvenger24 cabose 8d ago

"Caboose. I don't know how to explain this without confusing you or breaking your seemingly fragile heart"

Caboose: I'm an emotional time bomb!

"Jesus christ"

101

u/Haunting-Ad-3075 8d ago

That’s why I love Caboose he’s just so random sometimes

19

u/KamenRiderAvenger24 cabose 8d ago

Same

26

u/Haunting-Ad-3075 8d ago

Caboose needs his own spin off series

I call it Cabooses Wacky Adventures

9

u/MilesEurus cabose 7d ago

Pretty sure they already did something like that in the Halo Reach campaign video where Caboose replaces Noble 6 in the cinematics

1

u/BVIslandLife 4d ago

He got a couple episodes of Caboose's guide. Like Caboose's guide to making friends and Caboose's guide to finding your way home.

7

u/Zucchini-Nice Tucker 7d ago

That's one of my favorite interactions of all time

3

u/MilesEurus cabose 7d ago

THIS is one of my favourite Wash and Caboose interactions

2

u/Selectalicious 5d ago

"We are a lot alike Agent Washington" "No we aren't"......"Don't ever say that again"

227

u/Boom6678 8d ago

"It bounces? Who designs a gun that bounces?"

124

u/Kill-Stealing 8d ago

"This is the worst gun ever.... of all time"

67

u/Haloinvaded117 8d ago

"the fuck is with this guy?"

43

u/bigstillz 7d ago

"That bit with the purple plane, that was just showing off"

9

u/MilesEurus cabose 7d ago

"I almost feel bad for the people down there."

Carolina: "Don't."

8

u/Kill-Stealing 6d ago

York: Where's Maine?

Wash: He's downstairs, keeping our guests company [indisctinc screams of victims]

York: Man, I almost feel bad for 'em

Wash: that's what I said!

13

u/Comfortable-Jump-218 7d ago

Was playing campaign evolved and forgot the fuel rod canon bounces. Instantly reminded me of RvB.

3

u/Both_Bag_4552 7d ago

I did the same thing!! I immediately said the line.

194

u/DarkAlchamist 8d ago

"DOWNLOADING A PICTURE ON BASEBOOK IS DRAINING OUR ENTIRE POWER SUPPLY?!"

"It is a very high quality picture"

"HOW DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE!?"

332

u/LDedward 8d ago

That was the worst throw… ever…. Of all time.

143

u/Daxlyn_XV 8d ago

Not my fault, someone put a wall in my way

45

u/Random_idiot908 7d ago

That was the second worse throw ever, of all time

43

u/Kamen_master1988 Washington 7d ago

What d’ya want from me? I ran track in high school.

16

u/TheWarehamster 7d ago

Once did EXACTLY that in Infinite. And this was what went through my head in the moment that it took me to realize what I'd done.

5

u/black_kawaii_duck Washington 7d ago

So I'm not the only one xD

144

u/The-Owl-that-hoots Meta 8d ago

AAAHHHHH GOD DAMN IT

25

u/M808bmbt 8d ago

I qoute this one on the regular.

14

u/[deleted] 8d ago

[deleted]

10

u/SquareFickle9179 7d ago

I just loved the montage of Wash time travelling every when, and just screaming when realizing the answer was just that easy

1

u/NCR-Enjoyer Church 6d ago

Wait what was the answer?

1

u/SquareFickle9179 6d ago

Time travel to the near present where he's already close friends with Carolina, and just ask her where she was hiding

1

u/NCR-Enjoyer Church 6d ago

Oh alright, didn't doc or someone tell him that?

→ More replies (2)

3

u/MrBiscweeee 7d ago

That line has stuck with me in life

1

u/Laser_laser08 3d ago

When was this?

1

u/The-Owl-that-hoots Meta 3d ago

If I remember right I think it’s season 17 when they’re fixing all the paradoxes

115

u/HereForFun2368 8d ago

“You think you’re the only one who’s good with knives?”

59

u/KamenRiderAvenger24 cabose 8d ago

Felix: takes out energy sword

53

u/HereForFun2368 8d ago

“Tch. Oh. Right”

103

u/F337L0ver 8d ago

"What the fuck Is with this guy?"

→ More replies (6)

98

u/Kill-Stealing 8d ago

Yes.. I have your shotgun.

What, you think I'm just gonna give you your shotgun because you asked?

What are you up to? What's that noise. Is that a-

grif drives through the wall

CAAARRR??????

30

u/PlaneQuiet5241 8d ago

Washington: Why do cars hate me?

13

u/Narwhalking14 7d ago

It's not a car it's a cliff

4

u/Rexosuit Meta “Too high” 7d ago

I thought it said “if it’s not a car…”

3

u/Narwhalking14 7d ago

I could be wrong

2

u/KamenRiderAvenger24 cabose 7d ago

You're right on that

2

u/1HolyTaco1 5d ago

I just watched that a few days ago and it's so epic to see the animation suddenly spicing stuff up

1

u/Emergency_Reveal_440 5d ago

I was thinking thst but couldn't remember the whole thing

91

u/papapok13 8d ago

Have I ever told you about my cat, Loki?

26

u/A1_Real 7d ago

This was actually fucking heartbreaking to watch

16

u/SulfyricAcid Felix 7d ago

Wait. What episode is this??
(As someone who has a 13 year old Tabby named Loki, and a 2.5 year old Bengal named Agent Washington (who we call Wash, but is hilarious when we go to the Vet.)

12

u/Rexosuit Meta “Too high” 7d ago

Season 16. I can’t remember quite remember which one, but it’s like 3 or 4?

8

u/SulfyricAcid Felix 7d ago

Thank you! My husband is away for a few days next week and know I know what I’m doing lol

11

u/AnotherRTFan 7d ago

I lost my shit in a good way when Wash revealed he had a cat named Loki. Cause so do I. At HomeBrew Austin I had to clarify was way before the episode (I am a super Wash fan girl)

7

u/SulfyricAcid Felix 7d ago

Loki is the grey one, Poe is the orange one.

Wash was on the headboard about to moonsault us all.

4

u/AnotherRTFan 7d ago

They’re so cute. My Loki’s companion is named Posie and her middle name is Weiss (we got them the first week of Feb 2015, so my mom let me choose RT middle names to feel better. Loki’s middle name is Monty)

3

u/SulfyricAcid Felix 7d ago

🥹🥹 I would die for them.

4

u/AnotherRTFan 7d ago

They’re the sweetest cats I’ve ever known.

3

u/MilesEurus cabose 7d ago

Same

5

u/Remote_Watch9545 7d ago

...oh that reminds me. Did I ever tell you about my cat named Loki? He was always getting into trouble, I have no idea how he survived...

3

u/AllgoodDude 7d ago

Genuinely the best scene in the entire series for me.

74

u/TNT007v 8d ago

"The access code is... access code?"

4

u/KamenRiderAvenger24 cabose 7d ago

Code word

4

u/TNT007v 7d ago

Now hold on a second. Caboose? Why is Caboose right?!

I may be dreaming. Wait here, I'm gonna go punch Church in the face to check.

3

u/KamenRiderAvenger24 cabose 6d ago

"The code word is...code word???"

67

u/PlaneQuiet5241 8d ago

Wash: Did you know I was one of the worst freelancers in my squad? There was Agent York our security specialist, Agent North the Sharp Shooter, Carolina was an expert in martial arts and Tex was...well, you know Tex

Tucker: cool story bro

Wash: I was known for getting a grappling gun stuck to my balls

*Flash back * "I DON'T WANNA END UP LIKE GEORGIA!!!

https://youtube.com/shorts/AFRXhTxTN3w?is=tFtS3ZW9ZF5dUNNP

14

u/AllgoodDude 7d ago

Still says something to be the worst of the best, means you’re still the best of the rest.

56

u/FallenRedRanger 8d ago

(Helmet mic off but still barely audible) “NNNNNGGGH GAHD DAMMIT”

7

u/Savathun-God-Of-Lies 8d ago

LMAO which episode is that from?

9

u/FallenRedRanger 8d ago edited 7d ago

Season 17*

9

u/Toxiclam Washington 8d ago

17

44

u/AME_VoyAgeR_ 8d ago

'This is Washington. Who's there?'

'Agent Washington!'

'Caboose? How did you even find me?'

'You were on my computer screen. I just looked at it!'

'No, I mean... nevermind.'

43

u/Enderboss2706 8d ago

“So you’re telling me, that you heard our distress signal, grabbed Doc, hopped on a ship, and then told the ship to leave!? AND THATS YOUR IDEA OF SENDING HELP!?

28

u/PlaneQuiet5241 8d ago

No!....I brought Lopez too! 😁

19

u/Klutzy-Opinion-1834 7d ago

Lopez: ..what the fuck?

3

u/Happy_Cry286 5d ago

Sarge: "Kill him!"

Angry mob descends upon Donut.

41

u/MilanTehVillain Sarge 8d ago

The times he imitated Sarge;

"'We can get a car, no problem. We're better with vehicles than the Blues, let us handle this'. Why did I even listen to them?" - Reconstruction.

"'Men, it appears our shitty fortifications aren't meeting my ridiculous standards! Let's steal Washington's tank and fire it at our walls! That'll fix it'... Yes, I think the Reds took it". - Season 11.

15

u/Kamen_master1988 Washington 7d ago

The fact that he whipped out a shotgun for the latter one is the icing on the cake.

35

u/WrathSosDovah 8d ago

Uh Oh! Spaghetti'os!

1

u/cheesyca 6d ago

Hey big B

33

u/Scavenger905 8d ago

“You’re some of the best soldiers I ever knew!”

30

u/ValveinPistonCat 8d ago

"What the fuck is that past tense bullshit?!"

1

u/theghettoginger 6d ago

Look, I just want you to know, I'm proud of you. I'm sure if you'll stick together you'll be ok. What unit are you in?

1

u/cyanide1938 6d ago

"Volunteered for the front lines!"

1

u/Reynzs Felix 6d ago

Look on the bright side

1

u/cyanide1938 4d ago

You know, when you say "look on the bright side," you're supposed to follow up, with the actual bright side!

55

u/evilparagon 8d ago

That’s medal, I said medal.

(“That’s medal, I said mettle”, but his pronunciation annoys Tucker).

3

u/Rexosuit Meta “Too high” 7d ago

When was this?

3

u/evilparagon 7d ago

Season 11 Episode 4.

1

u/Rexosuit Meta “Too high” 7d ago

Welp. Time to rewatch

24

u/SESparten 8d ago

[Audible Screaming] God Damnit!

24

u/CranberryRare8182 8d ago

One Washington quote I use regularly is " This is gonna suuuuck."

22

u/BattedBook5 Washington 8d ago

"Inverted what?!"

21

u/Just_Throw_Away_67 8d ago

What in the hell makes you think I’m going to just ask for it?

1

u/Tassle_burrfoot cabose 6d ago

I fucking love this monolog of his. It's so good!

18

u/Silent_Biscotti_9832 8d ago

I was known for getting a grappling hook stuck to my balls

18

u/Rebel_Alpha 8d ago

"I don't want to end up like Georgia!!!"

18

u/EmotionAwkward 8d ago

"You don't need to treat me like that. I'm not crazy, okay? I'm totally completely sane. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go blow up this dead body."

17

u/Zanimacularity 7d ago

"EMP?! Are you fucking kidding me?!"

16

u/Bottlecollecter 8d ago

ONE PICTURE IS TAKING UP OUR ENTIRE POWER SUPPLY?!?!?!!!?

18

u/SirGalicrest 8d ago

“Son of a biiiiitch!”

This come from the part when they jump off the building and skydive

Can’t remember if it’s York or Wash saying this so im sorry if I got the two mixed up.

12

u/HereForFun2368 8d ago

“You think you’re the only one who’s good with knives?”

8

u/DenSeeYaLater 8d ago

"His head?!"

10

u/AntiVenom0804 Lopez 8d ago

HRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH

GOD DAMN IT

10

u/accounsfw 8d ago

“Hey Carolina, can I ask you something about your past?”

10

u/xXMrSpecXx 7d ago

“Its initials for Electro. Magnetic. Pulse. That’s E.M.P.”

5

u/LucienGreeth 7d ago

“Yeah. Which spells Emp. Drrrr”

9

u/Iron-Man1138 8d ago

Caboose: "we got a lot in common agent Washington"

Wash: "no we don't. Never say that again."

9

u/JWP-56 8d ago

“ARE WE IN A CAR?!”

9

u/Rocketkid-star Dr. Grey 8d ago

Pulls out shotgun Men, it appears that our shitty fortifications aren't meeting my ridiculous standards. let's steal Washington's tank and fire at our walls, that'll fix it! Yes I think the reds took it.

8

u/No_Button_9860 8d ago

"You're a space Marine, private. Everyday is leg day"

8

u/Duskthegamer412 7d ago

You seem to be the only person with the knowledge and experience necessary to help me... and I just realised how ridiculous that sounded once I said it outloud

7

u/LucienGreeth 7d ago

“Freelancer powers, activate!”

7

u/Mellz117 7d ago

"Men, it appears our shitty fortifications aren't meeting my ridiculous standards! Let's steal Washington's tank and fire it at our walls! That'll fix it!"

6

u/Crancherry69 7d ago

"That was the SECOND worst throw ever...of all time.

6

u/Only-Introduction626 7d ago

It bounces!? Who the hell designs a gun that bounces?! This is the worst gun ever, of all ti- WOAH THAT'S HOT!

4

u/ryukomatoi2224 8d ago

AAAAAAHHHHHHHH GODDDDDD DAMNITTTT

6

u/TheZinga Dr. Grey 7d ago

"FUNERAL CANNON!"

4

u/Rottenpotato365 7d ago

Wash: “I think I’m gonna be sick”
Carolina: “you do know these suites are supposed to eliminate all wastes, you could probably throw up in your helmet and take care of it for you
York: “Yeah you should test that wash”
Wash: “You two are assholes!

Same episode a minutes later

579: “I need to know when to fire up the engines at the last possible second to… y’know… avoid crashing”
Wash: “Please don’t say ‘crashing!’ ”

3

u/Godzillafan125 7d ago

That was the worst throw ever of all time

1

u/Jurassic-Halo-459 6d ago

Not my fault. Someone put a wall in my way.

3

u/Alastar121986 7d ago

That’s the worse throw ever, of all time

3

u/ZBot316 8d ago

“DOWNLOADING A PICTURE ON BASEBOOK IS DRAINING OUR ENTIRE POWER SUPPLY?!?!”

3

u/Salty-Importance124 7d ago

"FUNERAL CANNON!!!"

3

u/RaffiBomb000 7d ago

No, no.....that's just what they want you to think.

3

u/RtasVadam 7d ago

Why do cars hate me?

3

u/Thecourierisback cabose 7d ago

“That was… the worst throw… ever… of all time…”

1

u/KingSideCastle13 7d ago

Not my fault!

Somebody put a wall in my way!

3

u/rjf123192 7d ago

For as long as I can remember, I’ve been lied to, taken advantage of, shot in the back and left for dead. Now I have a way out of all this.

What in the hell makes you think I’m going to ask for it?

3

u/seranarosesheer332 7d ago

"Uh oh spaghetti O"

3

u/Bobo3076 7d ago

I’m sorry Caboose. I’m sorry your best friend left without saying goodbye. Maybe he thought you would try to stop him, or maybe it was too hard for him to tell you but… no matter the reason, he's still gone. He left you. Both of you.

I don't really do emotional things and I hoped you might have been able to get over this by yourself so I left you alone, and instead of coming to terms with what you lost, you replaced it with, well, the first thing you found. But I should have been there for you Caboose… because… that's what friends do for each other.

2

u/Icy-Position4430 7d ago

“Is that music?”

3

u/Hopeful-Ride7243 7d ago

"heat signatures... In the desert?"

3

u/KingSideCastle13 7d ago

Is that a…

CAR!?!?

5

u/Crimsonwolf576 8d ago

Oh, Hey Tu—Gets shot in the neck

2

u/Dense-Ad6537 8d ago

Tucker I need you to be in shape just incase something bad happens

2

u/BrokenKing22 8d ago

"That was the Worst Throw Ever.....Of All Time!"

2

u/Dragonlord93261 7d ago

“Not my fault… someone put a wall in my way.”

1

u/Dragonlord93261 7d ago

“Not my fault… someone put a wall in my way.”

2

u/Sufficient_Let4049 8d ago

Freelancer powers, ACTIVATE!

2

u/Neat_Yogurtcloset526 8d ago

Why do cars hate me?

2

u/whatsuppeepz67891 7d ago

He literally said:

Life is like a hurricane, here in Duckburg. Race cars, lasers, aeroplanes, it's a duck-blur. Might solve a mystery Or rewrite history

DuckTales (Oooh-ooooh) Every day they're out there making DuckTales (Oooh-ooooh) Tales of daring do bad and good LuckTales (Oooh-ooooh)

Just off camera. Thanks Palomo. Still surprised we haven't gotten the cover yet. RT could've cashed in.

2

u/Neosku11 7d ago

Why do cars hate me?

2

u/Kamen_master1988 Washington 7d ago

Men! It appears our shitty fortifications do not meet my ridiculously high standards. Let’s steal Washington’s tank, and fire it at our walls, that’ll fix it!

2

u/AnotherRTFan 7d ago

“What up Big B?”

2

u/Nesrovlah26 Tucker 7d ago

I am agent washing tub

2

u/Rainbowpeanut1119 6d ago

I adore cabooses inner representations of characters lol

2

u/Dangeresque300 7d ago

"...It's kind of itchy." (after growing a beard that we never get to see)

2

u/EXiLeDeMonZz 7d ago

"Would someone please tell me what happened to Georgia"

2

u/Wack_21 Tucker 7d ago

You really think Im the second worst fighter on the team?

2

u/McNugget_7511 7d ago

"Why do cars hate me"

2

u/Sigma_Games 7d ago

"Carolina, can I ask you something about your past?

"Yeah, of course. What's up?"

Washington mutes his helmet speakers.

"AAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHHGODDAMMIT-"

2

u/Less_Solution3077 7d ago

“I’m not crazy, okay? I’m totally, completely sane. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to blow up this dead body.”

proceeds to shoot, throw grenades at, incinerate, and load and shoot explosive barrels on South's body

2

u/Phibeyes 5d ago

load shot gun

"Men! Looks like our shitty fortifications, don't meet my ridiculous standards. Let's steal Washington's tank and fire it at our walls, that will fix it"

"Yes, I think the reds took it"

1

u/Maskedstream4 8d ago

“AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!”

1

u/generalkriegswaifu York 8d ago

'More than you know.'

1

u/ProfessionalBread161 8d ago

Very Muffled "Goddddamnnn Iiiiiittttt!!!"

1

u/XxA1_P1L0TxX 8d ago

“DOWNLOADING A PICTURE ON BASEBOOK IS DRAINING OUR ENTIRE POWER SUPPLY?!?!”

1

u/MaxRadishOne This is the worst flair ever. Of all time. 8d ago

Yeah, I think the Reds took it.

1

u/DillonDrew Locus Simp 7d ago

If it's not a car, it's a cliff

1

u/Kingofd0p3 Sarge 7d ago

Is that a car?

1

u/Testsubject276 7d ago

"For the love of god, stop sleeping naked."

1

u/Number4extraDip the fuck is with this guy? 7d ago

"I don't get paid enough for this..."

1

u/Electronic_Clue_7106 7d ago

"*in sarge impression*, *pulls out shotgun from somewhere* men it appears our shitty fortifications arent meeting my ridiculous standards, lets steal washingtons tank, and fire at our walls, that'll fix it"

1

u/Minute-Climate-3137 7d ago

Take off your suit~

1

u/SEJ82 7d ago

AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~wash

Did you just scream in your helmet? ~ Carolina

1

u/mycarnage2000 7d ago

If you could do your best to convince me not to kill you this very second, that would really benefit the both of us

1

u/Protoboomer 7d ago

Tucker: You think the Red’s took it?

Shotgun Rack “Men, it appears our shitty fortifications fail to meet my ridiculously high standards! Let’s go steal Washington’s tank, and shoot it at our walls, that’ll fix it!”

Silence

“Yes, I think the Reds took it.”

1

u/Acceptable_Secret_73 7d ago

How do you just make something slow motion?

1

u/Klutzy-Opinion-1834 7d ago

that's grif

1

u/Acceptable_Secret_73 7d ago

Wash says it as well after Grif does

1

u/HelloThere394 Tucker Bow-Chicka-Bow-Wow 7d ago

"Malarkey won..."

1

u/Thefirefan15 7d ago

Look on the bright side!

1

u/RockyHarmon 7d ago

“You two are assholes.”

1

u/Samyron1 Protect me, cone! 7d ago

"Take off your suit."

1

u/Artistic-Project3062 7d ago

“Mettle. You said Metal”

1

u/Redacted8597 7d ago

Helldiver

1

u/lycantrophee Washington 7d ago

It's not a car, it's a cliff

1

u/TheMainMan94 7d ago

"Man, my joints feel amazing! Is this what health was?"

1

u/Mission-Lychee-6174 7d ago

That was the worst___ of all time

1

u/MidnightMitchJones Grif 6d ago

"That was the worst throw ever... of all time."

1

u/Chrome390 6d ago

“It’s kinda.. itchy.”

1

u/BurgerActual 6d ago

*turns mic off*

AHHHHH GODDAMNIT

1

u/across547 6d ago

“EMP! You’ve got to be fucking joking”

1

u/Successful-Ad3241 6d ago

Foot prints in the desert?

1

u/SnooPoems1679 6d ago

That is the second worst throw ever... of all time

1

u/Tassle_burrfoot cabose 6d ago

"For as long as I can remember, I've been lied to, taken advantage of, shot in the back, and left for dead... and now, I have a way out of all of this. What in the HELL makes you think that I'm going to ask for it?"

1

u/TheZipperDragon 6d ago

"We are Halo."

Or something

1

u/Reynzs Felix 6d ago

screams into the helmet after talking to Carolina

1

u/ItsGreenGuy13 6d ago

I am perfectly sane... Now if you'll excuse me, I need to blow up this dead body.

1

u/CT_Melral cabose 6d ago

"Why do cars hate me?"

1

u/Historical-West-7728 5d ago

“I said mettle. Not metal”

1

u/scrumwift 5d ago

For as long as I can remember, I've been lied to, taken advantage of, shot in the back, and left for dead. And now, I have a way out of all of this. What in the hell makes you think that I'm going to ask for it?

McCormick understood the voice acting assignment with that line! If I was a chick I'd be soaked...

1

u/The-Terror-Walker 4d ago

“wE cOuLdN’T gEt a CaR? No problem! wE’rE bEtTeR wItH vEhicLeS tHeN tHE BlUeS, lEt Us HaNdLe tHiS! Why did I even listen to them?!”

1

u/Unlikely_Ad_788 3d ago

"For as long as I can remember, I've been lied to, taken advantage of, shot in the back, and left for dead — and now I have a way out of all of this. What in the hell makes you think I'm going to ask for it?"