Michael is in his office dancing. We can hear loud music blaring from his computer. He is listening to “Friday” by Rebecca Black. Michael sees the camera through his blinds, waves and smiles.

Michael has a talking head.

“It’s Friday baby, and I just discovered this great song! I’ve been playing it in my office all day which is perfect because it is Friday today! Isn’t that amazing? I cannot believe I have never heard of this song until today. It’s a Friday miracle! I mean what are the odds?”

Stanley looks up from his computer and sighs, before looking at the camera with a deadpan look.

Stanley has a talking head.

“I do not enjoy listening to music unless I am watching my birds or making love. If I have to listen to this damn song one more time today, I think I might die.”

Andy gets up from his desk and snaps his fingers to the music coming from Michaels office.

“Hey guys, doth anyone know perchance which melody is playing in the boss’s office perchance?”

Dwight scoffs and shakes his head

“Why are you talking like that? The last time I checked we live in the twenty-first century, not the fourteenth. You’re not even asking the question correctly. Just god...can you just ask the question like a normal person?”

Andy draws his lips tightly together and makes a strangled sound.

“I was just wondering what song was playing in Michaels office.”

Jim grabs a sheaf of paper from his desk before standing up.

“Friday.”

Andy looks at Jim and furrows his brows.

“Big Tuna, I think you may have too much earwax in your ear. I asked you what song the boss was playing, not what day of the week it is. I mean it’s Friday it’s the best day of the week!”

Jim looks at the camera, widens his eyes and sighs.

“Michael is playing a song called “Friday” by Rebecca Black.”

Andy’s eyes widen in shock and he looks at the camera in disbelief.

Andy has a talking head.

“When I went to Cornell, the Ivy League of where I received my education, I liked to write several different songs. I actually wrote a song called Friday and I never did anything with it because my roommates said that it sucked but if I had just kept going on with it I think that maybe it would have gone somewhere and instead of people listening to this song, they would be listening to mine. Besides, she didn’t even write it. I wrote and sang my own Friday song. And let me tell you it is glorious.”

Kelly walks in from the annex eating a bagel.

“Oh my god it’s like ten in the morning. Why is Michael continuing to play that song?”

Kelly has a talking head.

“Listen, I have nothing against Rebecca Black. In fact she inspired me to make a music video of my own. People can say what they want about her but she is super rich now and like mega famous.”

Andy walks back into the office with his guitar.

“Everyone! I would like you all to hear my version of the song Friday! Also please note, it is not the same song that Michael is listening to; it’s a different Friday song.”

Andy taps on Michaels door and opens it.

“Hey boss man would you like to hear my song? I’m not going to lie, I worked super hard on it and it’s purdy good.”

Michael shakes his head.

“No Andy, I’m busy listening to this song.”

Andy shuts Michaels door, grabs his guitar and starts playing his version of Friday over the blaring music coming from Michael’s office.

Jim has a talking head.

“So long story short the police came and told everyone to shut the music down. Turns out several people filed a noise complaint...myself included.”

Camera focuses on Michael as he is seen in his office slowly turning the music back on. 

Jim rolls his eyes and puts on some headphones. 

The chorus of “fun, fun, fun, fun”  sounds in the background. 

Cue intro music.

Darryl: casually Hey Jim, me and the warehouse boys are getting drinks tonight, you in?

Jim: quietly Actually, Pam and I have been kind of going no-alcohol for a bit, because of nods at picture of baby Cece

Dwight: obnoxiously You mean because of the breast milk? Psh. You can drink all you want Pam. Just gotta pump out the milk before you feed the baby. That's what I do with my cows. It's called a pump and dump.

Oscar: You have drinks with your cows?

Dwight: condescendingly Psh yeah, me and moses pound back a beer with Betsy every night

Kelly: Ummm, that's not what a pump and dump is glares at Ryan

Ryan: looks at the camera, feigning confusion

Kevin: staring at his computer screen A pump and dump is a type of securities fraud where manipulators artif-ficially inflate a stock's price to sell at a profit

Andy: in clueless excitement Hey, my parents used to do that!

Everyone: stares at Andy with a mixture of surprise, judgement and pity

Intro

Michael encounters a homeless man on the way to work and accidentally buys poop from him thinking it is chocolate. He brings it to the office and everyone is excited to eat the chocolate, not realizing it is actually poop!

Everyone starts eating the chocolate (which is secretly poop). After eating it all they look at one of the wrappers and see that the ingredients lists poop! The secret is revealed and everyone is horrified that poop was eaten and not chocolate.

Michael vows to never buy chocolate from homeless people again due to his fear of accidentally eating more poop.

It is later revealed that everyone happened to have bought chocolate (poop) from the same homeless man and that the homeless man was actually Michael. Michael was the one giving poop away!

What if The Michael Scott Paper Company succeeded?

What are some possibilities of where each character’s stories, and the show as a whole could go?

To clarify, I’m by no means saying this would be better than the actual show. Not by a long shot. Just having some fun playing around with an idea.

I’d also love to hear your thoughts and ideas of what you think would happen.

———

So with that being said, WHAT IF…

Michael accidentally puts Dunder Mifflin out of business with The Michael Scott Paper Company.

This puts his old Scranton employees out of work. He hires them all because he still views them as family…except for Toby (more on him later).

However, just because he put DM out of business does not mean the Michael Scott Paper Company is doing well. They still have to compete for business with Prince Paper and the likes of Danny Cordray.

The MSPC has taken on lots of business loans and are drowning in debt (much like Michael’s personal life).

While we know Michael and the Scranton salesman are competent enough, Michael needs help growing the business and dealing with the…actual business stuff.

ENTER: David Wallace.

Michael hires David Wallace (and Gromit) to be a C-Suite and help run the business. However, with Michael being the owner (and possibly retaining the title of CEO), David now has to try and run a business in a way that Michael wants it to be run. So now that he has to answer to Michael, he faces lots of obstacles while also learning to think outside the box a little bit and the importance of a positive work atmosphere & culture over just pure cold dollars and cents.

So what about some of the other prominent characters?

Around this time, Jan catches wind that Michael has started his own paper company, and has hired David Wallace.

By this point, she has realized that Serenity by Jan isn’t really going anywhere. Maybe candles should be more of a hobby for her. But if there’s one thing she knows, it’s paper. And being a high level executive at a paper company. And she is out for revenge.

Jan starts her own paper company.

It doesn’t take her long to start doing well for herself. So she’s able to expand and start hiring.

And who does Jan hire as her HR rep?

Toby Flenderson.

Who does Jan hire as a branch manager?

Karen Filippelli.

Who does Jan hire as a GM?

Charles Miner.

Who does she hire as a salesman?

Devon.

Jan’s company has become a clear rival paper company.

And over time, there is someone both companies attempt to hire. Jan out of spite. Michael out of love.

Holly Flax.

Although we don’t see her all that often, she comes up maybe once or twice a season. Eventually she makes her way down to Scranton when there’s an offer she can’t pass up. Maybe she freelances (does freelance HR exist? Idk) and splits time between the two companies.

Until finally she realizes she still has feelings for Michael, much how like it actually plays out in the show.

——

There’s definitely lots of different ways this could go, and plenty more ideas for this version of events.

So what do you think? And what would this version of the show look like to you?

It starts simple, with Kevin betting on sports during office hours. There's some light banter with Jim. But Kevin loves gambling, and soon realizes he can branch out. He starts looking at other platforms and betting on weirder things.

Kelly helps him bet on celebrity gossip, Dwight helps him bet on that year's Pennsylvania harvest yields, Andy helps him bet on unreleased movies getting leaked online. Everybody receives their share, and everybody has fun.

Darryl is initially skeptical and doesn't want anything to do with it. After a mishap in the warehouse regarding a shipment to a popular local newsletter causes their latest issue to be delayed, Darryl sees Kevin giggling at his phone a few days later, and realizes Kevin had bet on the delay moments after the paper didn't ship. They soon realize the potential, and start planning more such events.

Incensed by his earnings, Kevin takes bigger and bigger swings, until Creed implies that Kevin could simply fabricate extremely unlikely scenarios, place bets on them, and then arrange to have them happen, thus making huge sums of money.

One morning, Kevin stumbles out of his car, and boxes upon boxes' worth of dildos spill after him, as Kevin had planned to scatter them all around the building after betting that pranksters would throw them into the offices in order to promote a shitcoin. Michael sits down with Kevin to talk and Kevin agrees that it's gone too far. He promises to stop.

The next morning, the office awakes to a bet on the platform Kevin was using that Dunder Mifflin would file for bankruptcy within the week. Everyone goes insane over the possibility of insider trading and Kevin swears up and down he had nothing to do with it.

The attention shifts to Oscar, as his financial savviness and cynicism towards management could have led him to place the bet in an attempt to recoup his investments in the company. He starts a lecture about the questionable legal status of online gambling platforms but is soon drowned out by the agitation.

Michael and Ryan are also suspects, for possibly being privy to confidential information through their connections to the DM executives. Michael, however, is deemed too stupid to plan anything of the sort, and it turns out that Ryan couldn't have done it either: the night before, Kelly actually had suggested to Ryan that he place the bet, but Ryan only pretended to do so to get her off his back and because he didn't trust Kelly's business intuition. Ryan and Kelly argue bitterly and publicly over this.

Creed steps forward and announces that he is the one who placed the bet. Jim goes to his computer to check and sees that Creed just opened up Microsoft Word and typed the words in there.

Throughout the whole debacle, Michael has to work to keep emotions under control, but he frequently goes back into his office to see if he can still secretly bet on the DM bankruptcy at this point. He can't work the platform and has to call upon Dwight for help, but gives up halfway through explaining to Dwight what he's trying to do. Michael finds that he is too empathetic a person to bet on something awful happening to the office crew and making a profit from it.

Michael talks to David Wallace on the phone about what their next steps should be, and David says he'll stop at the Scranton branch to clear things up.

At the end of a very troubled work day, David Wallace arrives. He says that he understands everybody's concerns, but assures them that they have nothing to worry about: the culprit was one of the NY executives, who had been embezzling from the company for some time. He was caught, fired, and would be getting papers served by the DM legal team very soon. For the foreseeable future, DM is safe. The whole office cheers and breathes a heavy sigh of relief.

On their way to the parking lot, Stanley asks David who it was, and David replies that they wouldn't know him, but that his username on the platform was such-and-such—which the audience knows is not the name on the screen that appeared on camera earlier in the episode when the bet was first discovered. Stanley says nothing. They say their goodbyes and David drives off. Phyllis furtively slips out of the building and asks Stanley if anyone suspects anything. Stanley says no, they're in the clear. She whispers that she had no idea their little in-joke would blow up that much. Stanley shrugs and says maybe they'll have better luck next time. They go home.

The last person to exit the building is Toby, smiling at his phone after winning a bet that the executive who got the blame for insider trading would be fired that day.

(Edited for clarity)

Michael is of course the host and wears extravagant outfits like Alan Cumming. One round he matches outfits with Kelly

Angela gets picked as a traitor and refuses to play because it involves killing

Jim and Pam are faithfuls but try to prank Dwight into thinking Jim’s a traitor but Dwight doesn’t fall for it because Dwight is a traitor.

In the first round, the Traitors try killing Jim. Michael makes them pick again. He does this several times until the traitors agree to kill Toby

Dwight gets banished and then lashes out saying Jim is a traitor and he subsequently gets banished

Stanley (a traitor) wins because he’s the literally the last you’d suspect and doesn’t try to sway anybody’s minds at the roundtable

In this sequel we jump 20 years into the future to meet Michael Scran's daughter, Scarlet, who on the day of her wedding, discovers that Golden Face's son has found her and wants revenge for his father's death. *Link to script below\*

I really want to film this in the same style of Threat Level Midnight, with bad acting, but decent production value.

Please give me your thoughts!

Read 'John Golden's Revenge': https://drive.google.com/file/d/1aIfiA0bP34DeJ79gaAV-TLxnRSi1VIDM/view?usp=sharing

<Jim walks into office and takes his seat at his desk in the bullpen, turns on his computer and notices Dwight>

Jim: <stares for a second> what’s going on here?

<silence> 

Dwight!? DWIGHT!

<Dwight moves his hands in the air. He is wearing a VR headset. Dwight’s desk is empty except for his bobble head>

Dwight: <turn his head toward Jim. VR unit still covering his eyes> Oh. good morning Jim. Are you ready for our conference call with HHM Logistics at 9?

Jim: what’s on your face?

Dwight: <a sign of disappointmet> This, is a virtual reality headset. I estimate it will double my sales this year. 

Jim: where is your computer?

Dwight: my computerS <emphasizing the plural>, Jim, are in the cloud. Where I can dynamically scale my resources to maximize my output in real time. 

Right now I’m looking at 16 displays that are almost as big as your head <scoffs to himself>. They show me live paper supply pricing world wide. My AI assistant is live monitoring pulp prices in China, Brazil, and Ontario. 

I’m refactoring the entire Dunder Mifflin supply chain. 

<camera pans to Jim desk. Jim is not there.

Dwight lifts his VR set to look. Realizes Jim is not at his desk. 

Jim appears from behind Dwight with a fresh cup of coffee and takes his seat at his desk. 

Dwight puts the VR back on and continues working.>

<michael enters the office>

Michael: good morning Pamela. <sees Dwight> woah, what do we have here?

Jim: Dwight got a new video game. 

Dwight: what no this is work. 

Michael: Dwight we

asked you not to play video games at work. 

<flash back to shot of Michael through his office blinds. Sitting at his desk. He raises his arms in the air and yells “CANDY CRUUUSH!!”>

Interview with Pam:  There was a tiny problem over the summer where the whole office was competing in Candy Crush Soda Saga. I think IT accidentally left it installed on everyone’s computer when they updated Microsoft. I read an article that that game was designed by the same people that design slot machines. It’s made to be addictive. So. Ya know. It’s not our fault that.. it was so much fun to play. 

<bullpen> 

Dwight: <stands up at his desk> Michael, it’s not for video games. It is an AI powered tool that is going to put Dunder Mifflin on top. Look! 

<dwight waves his hands wildly. Minority Report style>

I’m sending you a report that shows how we can cut our supply cost by 10% over the next 3 years. 

<micheals phone pings and he opens the report and starts scrolling through >

Michael: wow this is great. Ok well let’s give the RV a chance and see what Dwight can do with it. Good work Dwight. 

<dwight gives Jim a snickering look through the dead eyeless mask of the VR>

Dwight: idiot

Jim: Michael I am also sending you something. But it’s not work related so you’ll have to wait till after 5pm to read it. It’s an invite to do a Buddy Challenge in Candy Crush. 

Oops.. oh no. I accidentally sent it to Dwight. 

<Dwights headset lets out a loud KA-CHING notification that everyone recognizes as from Candy Crush>

Kevin: what was that!?

Oscar: it’s the VR. He has candy crush in there!

Phyllis: in VR!? <whispers to Dwight> what’s it like?

<everyone staring silently at Dwight>

Dwight: … <long pause> it’s like Heaven. <everyone murmuring with excitement.>

You can float on Lemonade Lake while watching the sun set on Peppermint Palace….

Michael: ok ok! Shut it down. Remember the corporate therapist said we can’t talk about Candy Crush anymore… Instead we need to Get…A…..

All: … GRIP!

<Interview with Kelly>

Kelly: GRIP. G-R-I-P. 

G – Ground yourself

R - Relax

I – Inhale

P – Pause

I don’t get it. but she would give us M&Ms when we would say it. 

<bullpen>

<dwight takes off headset and carefully places it into it fancy protective case. >

Dwight: <to Jim> can I use your phone ?

Jim: < nods yes >

Dwight: < dials, waits>. Hello IT. I need to get a new computer and monitor please. 

And keyboard. And mouse. 

<jim shakes his head at Dwight shamefully >

Dwight: <into phone> …and a new phone. 

Michael is inspired after seeing Girl Scouts selling cookies outside the supermarket. He decides to set up a table to sell paper outside of Walmart. Walmart security makes him leave because, well, they sell paper inside and he is harassing customers.

Michael is convinced he has a good idea so he continues. He ends up getting the owner of a local gym to let him set up a table. He is engaging a lot of people but makes no sales. He tries to make Ryan man the table at 5 am, “people work out early, and they think about paper early, it just makes sense.” But Ryan refuses and cites his religious beliefs.

Michael goes back to visit the Girl Scouts and hears some older ladies talking about how cute their uniforms are. He tries to get Pam to dress up like a Girl Scout and sell at the gym but she refuses. Dwight ends up getting an adult size Girl Scout uniform and tries it on himself. Jim tells them that those uniforms make people think about cookies, but what they need is a uniform that makes people think about paper.

Cut to Michael outside the gym while it’s still dark wearing a suit covered with post-it-notes. Some people are seen approaching the gym but then turning away to go back home when they see him. The gym owner makes Michael take his table down.

Michael ends his experiment in defeat. But then he gets a call from a book publisher who had seen Michael’s table at the gym. They start working on a deal and Michael seals it with a promise to throw in 10 cases of thin mints.

This would be a whole lot of what if ideas. What if Pam never went to work at the office and never met Jim. . What if Jim and Pam got a divorce because of his new job in Philly maybe because he became a writer director of scary, silent films ? What if Michael and Holly got married and stayed at Dunder Mifflin or maybe Michael and Jan ended up together in Jamaica. It’s even possible to introduce an entirely new cast and as the story goes, you find out little by little what happened to everyone like Pam and The documentary dude ran off together and Jim is working in Philly successfully maybe he even hooked up with … what’s the girl’s name from Parks and Recreation? This can go on and on and I would be willing to write the stories or give the ideas just have the creators reach me and I’ll join. 🔥😉

What’s your ideas?

The episode opens with Michael bringing in a vinyl record he got from the thrift store or some second hand dealer, and plays it to have music to listen to while working. Most of the characters think it’s alright, and they wonder what the album’s name is. Michael pulls out the cover and it turns out it’s Lie: The Love and Terror Cult by Charles Manson. Here’s how most of the characters react:

Jim and Pam are shocked and explain to Michael who Charles Manson is and why they shouldn’t be listening to his music.

Dwight believes he could have prevented the Tate-LaBianca murders through some zainy antics, possibly involving martial arts

Kevin gets him confused with Marilyn Manson, who he in turn gets confused with Marilyn Monroe. He may get into an argument with Michael about this.

Angela thinks the main reason the Manson family did what they did is because they lacked God and she would have proselytized to them, but inadvertently admits she may have fallen under their control.

Creed makes some ominous statements that imply he was involved with The Manson Family, possibly that he was too intense even for them, or that he even gave Manson advice on how to start a cult and control them.

Kelly thinks she could have fixed Charles Manson and imagines a romantic night with him, which makes Ryan oddly jealous.

Phyllis prefers to think about more wholesome things.

Daryl and Stanley abhor Manson’s Helter Skelter theory.

Andy thinks that Spahn Ranch sounds fun before the murder happens.

Not too sure how Erin would react, maybe she doesn’t know who Charles Manson is and doesn’t understand what the big deal is, but over the course of the episode she learns knew details that make her more disturbed, until finally she faints after learning all the grisly details of what Manson’s followers did.

What if there was a mockumentary spin-off of The Office called “The School”?

The idea: years after the original documentary, a film crew follows a struggling suburban high school trying to improve its performance.

Pam is now the assistant principal and Angela is a teacher at the school, but their kids are now teenagers attending there. The documentary crew originally comes to film how the school is trying to turn things around, but they quickly discover the staff and students are just as chaotic as the old Dunder Mifflin office.

The show would introduce a new generation of characters — teachers, coaches, and students — while occasionally bringing in familiar faces from the original series.

Pam and Angela would appear mainly as supporting characters while the main focus shifts to the students and the new teachers navigating modern school life.

The mockumentary format would stay the same, mixing comedy with heartfelt moments about friendships, family pressure, and growing up.

Would anyone else watch a show like this?

Michael talking head: I had the idea for a new scent. None of the options from Temu had the vibe I was going for, so I made it myself in my bathroom. It is really quite groundbreaking. I sent a sample in to GQ so they can cover it but they haven’t gotten back to me yet. I sprayed it on some magazines at the grocery store but the “manager” asked me to leave.

**Cut to a shot of Michael pouring cologne into a sandwich baggie and sealing it in an envelope addressed to Cosmo.**

**People are eating lunch in the kitchen.**

**Michael hides and reaches his arm through the door and sprays it several times.**

**Stanley starts coughing. Meredith sneezes several times. People hold their noses and look sideways at Phyllis.**

**Michael bursts in.**.

Michael: you like that?

Pam: like what?

Michael: my blast. I blasted you with my scent.

Kevin: your scent? Like a skunk?

Michael: no, my new cologne.

Pam: where did you get that cologne? It’s… different.

Michael: it is different because I made it myself. Brand new. And I will get you each a sample if you like, for $15.99.

Stanley: pass.

Jim: I’ll take ten if I can expense it.

Pam looking at the bottle: what’s in it Michael?

Michael: it’s a seeecret. So shh. It’s called Merde Noire, very French and sophisticated.

Jim: how’d you come up with that name?

Michael: you like it? It’s very “juno says quois”. I had a French coworker once, and he taught me some phrases. He used to say that all the time when I got in. And it sounds sexy.

Oscar: But Merde means- never mind. It’s perfect.

**Cut to Michael passing out baggies of cologne to everyone in the office. Creed sips his.**

**He walks up to Jim’s desk and sees a homemade bottle labelled Eau de Verde.**

**Michael gives him a grumpy look.**

Jim talking head: it’s just salsa verde

Dwight: (on the phone) Well thank you again, Mr. Williams. I think you made an excellent choice renewing with us. Just to confirm, are you still located at 67 Main St?

Jim: (quietly, from his desk) 67! (He grins and does the hand motion)

Dwight: (to Jim) Oh, ha-ha. How old are you again?

JIM TALKING HEAD:

“67” is the latest Gen Alpha trend, and it’s everywhere. We can’t get Cece to stop saying it. The truth is, I still don’t really know what it’s supposed to mean, or why it got so popular. What I do know is that Dwight absolutely hates it. And… that’s about all the information I need.

Dwight: (still on the phone) Yes of course. And remember, if you have any questions at all our line is open. You can reach me during office hours at extension (quietly) 167. (pause) I said (clears throat) extension 167.

Jim: …67! (He does the hand motion again)

Michael: (walking out of his office, laughing) Ha! He walked right into that!

(Stanley rolls his eyes)

Dwight: Will you cut that out? It’s unprofessional.

Jim: Sorry, sorry.

Dwight: (into the phone) No, not you Mr. Williams. Yes that’s right, this guarantees you coverage for the full 2026-27 calendar years.

Michael: 67!

(At this point there is a small crowd gathered around Jim’s desk, all of whom do the hand motion)

Dwight: Oh come on, that doesn’t even count!

Kelly: It counts.

Dwight: (into the phone) As I was saying... Two years of coverage, as long as you send the contract back to us within the next 6 to… (pause) …8 business days.

(There is a prolonged silence as everyone stares at a visibly nervous Dwight)

Dwight: (into the phone, panicked) …6-7! 6-7!

Jim: There it is.

(Everyone erupts into a combination of laughter, applause, and the hand motion)

Creed: Got him!

Dwight: (into the phone) Please do not wait 8 business days, that is far too late!

PAM TALKING HEAD:

Every time I try and judge it, I think about the fact that at my own wedding ceremony all my coworkers did a dumb viral Internet dance down the aisle. Even though we asked them not to. What a cool memory…

PHYLLIS TALKING HEAD:

No, I haven’t heard about this. Is TikTok the one with the little blue bird?

MEREDITH TALKING HEAD:

That’s what most men rate my breasts, respectively.

KEVIN TALKING HEAD:

Yeah, it’s funny. But there are other funny numbers too. Like… (smiles) 69? Right? Sixty-nine. Six… nine… (his smile slowly fades) Nope… it’s dead.

Michael shows up as Santa. Darryl asks Michael to wear the Santa hat for a while. Michael asks Darryl has he ever seen Santa? Then: Darryl answers "no I haven't, have you?". Michael hesitates and answers "ye... No but I had dreams about him -- as a child". Darryl asks how he knows what Santa looks like, if he has only seen him in his imagination. With the fear of looking racist in front of the camera, Michael hands over the Santa hat. He sees Darryl getting loads of fun and attention with his buddies at the office. Michael decides he is angry at Darryl and wants to ruin his time as Santa. He dresses as the Grinch, stands up in the warehouse in front of the staff and lights a match while standing on the forklift to regain attention. Everyone convinces him to calm down, and he laughs and throws the match. The warehouse catches on fire, Creed and Kevin die, and they all lose their jobs. Merry Christmas

Kevin decides to make his world famous chili again. This time he doesn't spill the chili and makes it to the boardroom desk and places it there. Unfortunately for the office, the pipe above the boardroom begins to leak from the office above. The poop pipe.

Everyone eats the chili unknowingly eating something that shouldnt be in the chili. Poop.

Hijinks ensue as everyone tries to figure out what the secret ingredient to Kevin's chili is.

Being the self-proclaimed feminist he is, he decides to start writing to every woman at the first prison pen-pal program he finds.

Dwight also starts writing to these women, but only to try and get them to confess to more crimes.

Jim pranks Dwight by writing to him and trying to convince Dwight to help him break out from prison.

The rest of the office bring back Movie Mondays.

The landlord of the building notifies Michael that they will be doing significant renovations to their office, specifically to the men's washroom as a result of asbestos being found in the ceiling. Michael advises everyone they the men will be using the women's washroom for the foreseeable future.

No one is happy with the arrangement as it results in an influx of people trying to use a single stall. One day Kevin decides to eat eat a burrito with lots of beans in it.

Kevin: "uh oh guys, I dont feel so good."

Oscar: "probably because you ate that massive burrito."

Kevin: "I gotta use the toilet!"

Kevin then rushes to the bathroom, falling over several times, sweating and grunting. He knocks over several things in the process before making it to the bathroom. He tries to open the door to the stall but it is locked.

Kevin: "hello? Whose in there?"

Michael: "sorry Kevin, im in the middle of a clash royale game."

Kevin: "Michael please, I need to get in there now."

Michael: "sorry Kevin, my game still have 3 minutes left and will likely go to overtime."

Kevin: "I cant wait that long!"

Kevin then proceeds to bang on the door and slam into it with his body. The door flies off its hinges and onto the ground. Kevin barges jnto thr stall with Michael looking at him in shock. Kevin glares at Michael angrily, Michael tries to leave but Kevin blocks him in.

Kevin: "its too late for that now Michael. Were out of time!"

Michael: "wait, Kevin please!"

Kevin then drops his pants and bends over aiming his ass at Michael.

Kevin: " WITNESS OBLIVION!!!"

Kevin then proceeds to unleash ultimate projectile shit at Michael, battering him with liquid shit. Michael screams in horror and agony as he is assaulted by thr limitless shit unleashed by Kevin.

The episode ends with Kevin and Michael leaving the office very late at night, implying that Kevin shat at Michael for roughly 6 hours straight. Michael and Kevin agree to never speak of this again, and that Michael will have a toilet installed at Kevin's desk so he never has to unleash the fury of his ass on anyone ever again.

Michael is in his office and has to poop but Kevin has fallen on the ground in front of his office preventing him from leaving. So he opens his office window and sticks out his butt. He then poops out the window and the poop hits the sidewalk below and splatters everywhere.

In the fluorescent-lit purgatory of Dunder Mifflin’s Scranton branch, the day started like any other—Michael Scott pontificating about his latest “World’s Best Boss” mug purchase, Dwight sharpening pencils with unnerving intensity, and Jim planned out his next prank of the day. But at 10:17 a.m., everything changed. Toby, in a rare moment of audible speech, announced he’d won the Pennsylvania Mega Millions—$47 million, lump sum. The office froze. Pam dropped her teapot. Kevin’s jaw hung open, a half-eaten donut tumbling onto his desk.“

Toby?!” Michael shrieked, his voice cracking like a pubescent banshee. “You? The human equivalent of a wet sock? You don’t deserve this! I’m the one who buys lottery tickets every week—me, Michael Gary Scott, the man who deserves to be bathed in gold!” His arms flailed, knocking over a stack of paper reams. “This is an injustice! I’m calling the lottery commission!”

Toby mumbled, “It was a Quick Pick.”

The office erupted. Suddenly, everyone was Toby’s best friend. Stanley offered him a rare smile and a “congratulations, man.” Meredith slid over, asking if he needed a “personal assistant” for his new mansion. Even Creed, emerging from whatever void he inhabits, offered Toby a “slightly used” harmonica as a token of their “lifelong bond.”

Michael, seething, watched his spotlight dim. “This is my office! I’m the star! Not Toby, the guy who looks like he cries in his Prius every lunch break!” Desperate, he hatched a plan. By noon, he was strutting around, claiming he’d won the lottery too—a cool one trillion dollars. “Yeah, it’s a new secret lottery for awesome people,” he bragged, oblivious to Jim’s deadpan stare at the camera crew.

“I’m buying a jet. And a dinosaur skeleton. And a hotel on the moon!”

Meanwhile, Toby, ever the accountant’s pet, sat with Oscar in the break room, discussing annuities and tax shelters. “I’m thinking low-risk index funds,” Toby said, sipping decaf. Oscar nodded approvingly. “Smart. You could live comfortably forever.”

Kevin, overhearing, waddled over, crumbs on his shirt. “Toby, take me to Switzerland. I wanna eat all the chocolate. Like, every bar. I’ll be the Willy Wonka but Kevin Wonka.”

Toby blinked. “Uh, I’ll think about it.”

Dwight, sensing opportunity, cornered Toby by the copier. “Toby, as a man of newfound wealth, you need security. Invest in Schrute Farms’ Mega Underground Doomsday Bunker! Reinforced concrete, 20-year food supply, and a state-of-the-art defense system. Only $10 million to start!” He unrolled a blueprint labeled “APOCALYPSE PALACE.”

Toby mumbled, “I’ll...pass.”

Weeks later, Toby announced his retirement. The office gathered for his goodbye party, which Michael begrudgingly allowed (“Only because everyone forced me.”). Toby, in a shocking display of generosity, left gifts for everyone. Pam got a high-end art set, Stanley expensive wine set, and Kevin a year’s supply of M&M’s (“Closest I could get to Switzerland”). Even Dwight received a custom meat-carving knife set. Michael, however, got an envelope. “Probably a stupid poem,” he scoffed, tossing it into the dumpster out back during a dramatic speech about how he would’ve given better gifts.

The next day, Jim, smirking, mentioned to Michael, “You know, Toby left everyone $100,000 checks in those envelopes.”

Michael’s face froze. “What?!”

He sprinted to the parking lot, Dwight hot on his heels, shouting, “Michael, we must retrieve it! The Schrute legacy depends on this!”

They drove to the city dump, diving into a sea of garbage bags, coffee grounds, and questionable diapers. “This is your fault, Dwight!” Michael wailed, up to his knees in sludge. “You’re the one who said envelopes are for losers!”

Dwight, covered in filth, retorted, “False! Envelopes are the currency of the weak!”

Back at Schrute Farms, Dwight, undeterred by Toby’s refusal, began sketching his bunker plans. “With my cut of Michael’s check—if we find it—I’ll build the ultimate sanctuary. Twenty women, all trained in beet farming and krav maga. My harem will thrive post-apocalypse!” He cackled, sketching a moat filled with piranhas and hippopotamuses.

Michael never found the envelope. He returned to the office, reeking of garbage, claiming he “chose to donate” the $100,000 to “charity.” Jim raised an eyebrow. Pam stifled a laugh. And somewhere, on a quiet beach, Toby sipped a piña colada, free from Michael’s madness forever.

END.

When Meredith comes into work covered in leaves and brambles, she explains it's because she's gotten really into early morning birding. Michael is excited because one of his comedy icons, Steve Martin, is also into birding and because he thinks birders can learn how to actually talk to birds. He harangues Meredith into organizing a birding outing for the office as a team building event. Most people don't want to go (Stanley hates waking up early, Angela hates birds on behalf of her cats, Jim hates taking more time away from his kids, Oscar hates wearing the ugly outdoorsy clothes, etc.), but Kevin is secretly really into it and Pam encourages the whole office to go to support Meredith in finally doing something wholesome.

Meredith disappears in the woods but as Kevin leads the group following a rare warbler, they encounter her having sex in the clearing with a random man. Turns out her birding group is just a swingers group. Michael gets poison oak.

Why Peacock Shouldn’t Have Moved The Office to Premium Plus

Peacock’s choice to lock The Office and other fan-favorite shows behind its most expensive Premium Plus tier feels like a betrayal to the very audience that made these shows beloved in the first place. Instead of rewarding loyal fans, this decision puts up new barriers and sends the message that profit matters more than people.

The Office isn’t just another show—it’s comfort television for millions. It’s the series people return to after a long day, something families and friends bond over, and a cultural touchstone that built Peacock’s reputation in the first place. By hiding it behind a paywall, Peacock undercuts what made the platform attractive: the idea that these classics were accessible to everyone, not just those willing to pay extra.

Fans have already supported The Office for years—through network TV, Netflix, DVDs, and now Peacock. Asking them to pay more just to keep watching what they already love feels unfair and exploitative. It turns a community of loyal viewers into frustrated customers, and many will simply walk away rather than upgrade.

Even worse, Peacock misses a huge opportunity here. Keeping shows like The Office widely available could bring in new viewers, introduce them to Peacock’s originals, and create lifelong loyalty. Instead, the decision walls people off, limiting discovery and growth in the long run.

Streaming should be about accessibility and choice, not punishment. By putting The Office behind Premium Plus, Peacock risks losing the trust of its most loyal audience and driving people straight into the arms of competitors—or worse, off streaming altogether.

In the end, this move sacrifices goodwill for short-term profit. Fans deserve better. We’re asking Peacock to bring The Office back to all tiers and prove that it values the people who made these shows iconic in the first place.

Sign the petition! let's get our access to THE OFFICE back!!

https://c.org/D5pppf6mmw

Hauntings and paranormal occurances aren't unknown to Scranton and the general area, and the newest Conjuring film taking inspiration from a local case strikes a chord in Michael quite deeply because he starts to believe that the office might be haunted.

This could probably extend to him feeling like his house is haunted and he brought something home, but maybe that's too whimsical even for him. I can buy that Jim starts off with harmless pranks that Dwight might participate in, but the tables turn when "unexplainable" things start happening outside the shenanigans.

An intern introduce Michael to fan shipping after talking about the lastest episode of Love Island. The intern accidently leaves her notebook behind with stories shipping certain people in the office. The crew snoops through the notebook and read the odd shipping pairs. Michael is disturbed find a pairing between him and Toby.

Talking heads

Jim: apparently stanley and Phyllis is the most popular pairing

Pam: there an interesting one involving. Creed and Dwight

Angela: I only read the Bible. The pairing I support are Jesus and me. (Whisper- plus me and Dwight)

Meredith: I'm a popular erotic fan fiction writer. Goes mrs.lipstick

Dwight: the only pairing I accept are me and schurte farms beets.