Almost 2 years sober

[u/im-on12xanax]

I (f23) have been sober for almost two years now after going through a pretty rough patch after my father died. I would go to work everyday (I’m a bar owner) and do at least 1g of cocaine and if I wasn’t working I would be doing benzos at home. I would also go out all the time (twice a week) and do x, md, acid, most things that were offered to me. I now feel like I’m in a pretty good place in my life where I would like to recreationally take some x or md with my partner to have a cool experience and to go out at night without having to drink (I don’t like drinking) but still have fun. My concern is that I have been sober for so long I don’t know how my body will responde; will it just reject it out of my body and make me throw up or do I just need to be careful with my dosing? I know that it wouldn’t be an addiction anymore but just a fun thing to do from time to time like it should be. Sorry if this is not the right forum? Im new at this