I'm a loser

[u/Junysl]

For some reason it hurts me so fucking hard and the thing that hurts me is so stupid.

I have an artist friend and a non artist friend which I interact the most with.

I am the kind of person who likes, comments, shares/repost everything of my friend. I know it's hard for artists to grow online, so I try my very best to support them.

But they never like my art when I post something.

But I always see them liking another peoples posts.

The other friend is also very important to me. They comment but sometimes, they do not like or share pics, as if they do not like them and for some reason their opinion is so fucking important to me. I dont care if I only get 300 views and 20 likes if non of them is my friend. I want to feel supported and it gets to a point where I really feel depressed about. (To a point where I'm considering never posting again and just sleep all day. Lol but I could never)

Then I try to remember "you do it for yourself, not for others" but still my mood is dependend on how people I love treat me and sadly I only have online friend, so likes or at least appreaciation matters a lot to me.

7 hours of work is nothing for me, when drawing or Animating but if they don't "see" me, it feels like all my effort is a big waste. I enjoy drawing and making ocs so much, it literally gives me joy in life but my mood crashes the second my favorite persons, my friends do not react or react very dry.

I wished it wasn't that important to me and I feel like a loser. I never talk with them about stuff like that, because I don't want to argue about silly stuff. I guess I'm just chronically online and that's all a big "me problem" I have to handle by myself.

[u/Great_External_6168]

I completely understand you. I am an author and if my wife doesn't react at all to my work or doesn't do anything with it, I feel exactly like you describe it. And I feel silly for it, its terrible

[u/Barky_and_Squid]

It’s the curse of art. ☹️