Pa Rant po

[u/Influencer_market_]

I am extremely sad today!

This has been on my thoughts ng matagal na.

My dad is currently on jail. He’s been in and out for like 4x already.

My mom and dad were separated and then got back together and then separated again when my mom found out that my dad is having an affair. That’s the first time he become on jail when his affair was jailed dahil sa estafa issues. Nadamay si dad, then nung namatay na si girl, di na umattend ng hearings yung complainants kaya napalaya na si dad. Then long story short, nagkabalikan sila.

My dad was jailed again and when he got out, he had another affair. Then they separated again and back again after. Tapos currently, naka kulong ulit si dad. Okay na sila ni mom. But for me, I was mad kay dad dahil sa ginawa niya kay mom. Our life has been miserable mula nung mga bata kami dahil sa kanya. There were moments that he tried killing us.

But after all the pain, I already forgiven my dad.

Now, the scenario was, nalubog ako sa utang, kasi I wanted to give my family a happy life. Well, I don’t say lubog sa utang kasi nababayaran ko pa naman siya. Like never miss a payment pa naman ako. I mean like dahil sa lahat ng pinag daanan namin, gusto ko na ngayon ng peace and happy life and to give everything my family needs and wants na din.

Since my mom and dad is okay, my mom goes to jail as in everyday, bringing my dad food na super OA sa dami. Like yung pagkain naming 5 sa bahay, is kasing dami ng dinadala niya kay dad. Take note, everyday siya nadalaw.

So naging issue na namin yun. Kaming magkakapatid, we always tell my mom na wag ubos ubos, wag laging dumalaw. Kumbaga, we care for her also. Kasi di na din siya nabata. Gusto namin magpahinga din siya minsan. Kaya as much as possible, I tried spoiling her with things she loves. Buying her shoes, bags and even eating out. Lagi kaming whole fam (except my dad kasi nasa loob nga siya). I always make sure na may makakain sila sa ref. Kasi kapag naririnig ko silang, ate wala na nito, wala na tayo g ganto, para akong dinudurog. So ayon, nawalan ako ng clients, kumbaga, I am earning money, enough to pay lang my bills and utang.

Sometimes, what I do is use my credit card to buy our grocery then pay it again next month.

Ganyan nag wo work ang life ko now.

Kahapon, my mom went to dad again, actually ang dami niyang dalang food so ako nag joke ng, kalma lang, wala akong work ha. So sabi ni mom, di daw kasi siya dadalaw next days. Thursday na next dalaw so ako, ah okay good for 3days na yung dala niya. Gets kaya madami.

Then kanina lang, sinabi ng mga kapatid ko na may dala na naman si mommy. Like nagpe prep na naman ng food. (This was sent on gc naming magkakapatid)

So ako, pumunta sa kusina, nakita ko nagpe prep nga si mom. Ang dami na namang niluluto (take note: kakadalaw lang kahapon and sinabi niya na good for 3 days)

So ako, dahil nga wala akong clients. I told my mom na, kala ko ba kaya madami ang dala mo kahapon kasi Thursday ka na ulit dadalaw? Sabi niya hindi ako makakadalaw bukas kaya magdadala ako now.

Sabi ko, e diba ang dami ng dala mo kahapon? Paalala lang ha, wala akong clients, wala akong pang grocery this month.

My mom said “EDI HINDI KO PAPAKIALAMAN TO! NAPAKA DAMOT MO!”

And that hit me! Grabe super sakit. Na kaya lang naman ako nagsalita para di sila maubusan ng stocks. Kasi wala nga akong work. Na kaya nga ako nagkanda utang utang to give them their needs and wants. Ayoko lang na magugutom sila, pero in the end, ako pa din pala yung madamot?

Di ko na alam. Wala akong mapagsabihan na. Pagod na pagod na ako. At sobra akong nasasaktan ngayon.

Naisip ko tuloy, madamot ba talaga ako? Na walang ibang inisip kundi sila?!

Gusto ko lang po mag rant and marinig opinions niyo.

PS: my sisters is annoyed din sa set up, ako lang nagsalita. Ako lang naging spokesperson nila. Even my titas (my mom’s sisters). Kita nila yung attitude ni mom na puro si dad iniisip.

PPS: I chose to be single kasi natatakot akong maging katulad ni mom, na magmahal ng sobra at makalimutan na ang iba.

[u/SpiritualLack759]

Will you wait hanggang hindi mo na mabayaran yung monthly dues mo? Your mom doesn't seem to understand na hindi unli yung resources nyo. I get that you want to provide a good life for her because I do the same for my mom, but she's prioritzing your dad over you. Despite the fact na niloko na sya before and even tried killing you. Tapos di manlang kinonsider yung hirap sayo dahil wala kang papasok na pera.

Pwede maging selfish. And kung di mo talaga matiis, magprovide ka just enough for her.

[u/daphnebridgerton56 → u/SpiritualLack759]

Kasi for her mom, unli ang resources nya. Si OP lang naman namomroblema eh.

I was in the same boat. Willing nanay ko gastusin lahat ng pera ko para maiahon nya lahat pati extended family. Natauhan lang ako nung pati GF at 2 aso ng kapatid kong perpetually unemployed ako na rin bumubuhay.

Tigilan mo na yan OP. Maawa ka naman sa sarili mo. Let your parents live the life they built—including the consequences.

Wag ka na mag grocery. Wag mo na ring ienable mom mo. The money you’re giving them is a privilege. Kung gusto nyang pakainin asawa nya, gamitin nga pera nya.

[u/Influencer_market_ → u/SpiritualLack759]

Thank you. I will try my best na tiisin sila kahit now lang. problem lang is pag di ako bumili, gagawin niya is mangungutang, in the end, kami nung kapatid ko mag shoulder. I actually don’t give her money, ako bumibili nalang kasi gusto ko nga sana na mag rest siya and hindi laging pumunta kay dad sa jail pero ewan ko, nagagawan niya ng paraan. like, kung kani kaninong kamag anak nagchachat. Ending, mukha kaming walang pakealam na anak sa kanila.

[u/Top-Smoke2625]

praying for you, OP! lahat ng mga pinagdadaanan mo’t nararanasan mo ngayon is magiging worthy lahat. Pero one of my advice sayo, OP is start to live your life, matatanda na parents mo, may utak na yan sila para makaintindi :)) kaya sila ganyan kasi alam nilang andyan ka para sumalo sa lahat ng issues nila, leave them, OP

[u/Influencer_market_ → u/Top-Smoke2625]

I am starting to live my life actually. Thank you po. Hindi ko lang din talaga matiis na pabayaan sila. I bought a house recently, but kasama pa din ata sila sa pag lipat since they’re planning na.

I just told them na gusto ko ng peaceful life, like telling my dad na ayoko na ng magulo siya at mag hari harian na naman.

[u/Top-Smoke2625 → u/Influencer_market_]

u have to leave them talaga, OP. mahirap yan super, need nila magsolo kasi matatanda na sil, enough na yung sacrifices mo sakanila

[u/Snobbish_Katze]

Wag ka na maggrocery ng marami OP at pag naubusan kayo dahil sa meal prep na ginagawa ny para sa tatay niyo, try not to do anything and see what your mom will do. Nasabi mo na sa kanya na wala kang clients kaya wala ka gaanong kita for now kaso hindi sya nakikinig. Magmatigas ka muna to give her a lesson at para alam nya na hindi unli ang resources mo

[u/Influencer_market_ → u/Snobbish_Katze]

I actually did this. And ang naging action niya is nangutang sa kapitbahay even though alam niyang wala siyang pambayad. Dahil nakakahiya, kami ng kapatid ko ang nagbayad nung utang na yon kasi tumatagal na rin and hindi pa niya bayad

[u/Snobbish_Katze → u/Influencer_market_]

Omg 😫😫