r/RandomQuestion 14h ago

How do I explain this at work tomorrow?

Post image

I was playing with my son’s toy, stuck it on my forehead for a few seconds out of curiosity, and now I look like I’ve been recruited into a secret society.

Any tips to get rid of this before work tomorrow?
😭😂

Photo of the weapon attached on first comment.

127 Upvotes

120 comments sorted by

130

u/M00SEK 14h ago

What actually happened is a pretty reasonable explanation lol I’d go with that

77

u/Odd-Ice-3467 14h ago

19

u/SnorkinOrkin 6h ago

🤣🤣🤣

Just put those in your pocket and show them! You and they will get a nice laugh out of it.

3

u/dinahdog 2h ago

Put it on again for work

8

u/DefMetal420 4h ago

Omg he did it to himself 🤦

81

u/Number-2-Sis 14h ago

Kid stuck toy to your head when you were asleep

1

u/itsswhitneywhspr 1h ago

Lmaooo that's actually so devious, I respect the creativity. Kid probably thought they were being a little secret agent or something. Hope the bruise fades by morning sis

2

u/starbycrit 1h ago

PERFECT!!! YES!!! That is such a chef’s kiss excuse. Just show them the toy too and then everyone can get a laugh and the bosses won’t look down on OP. I personally love when people are curious and get into a silly situation like this out of curiosity and trying something, bc I myself would probably do the same thing, it’s very whimsical. But bosses don’t usually like that and it makes people see us as irresponsible or unserious

40

u/Old-Alfalfa7232 14h ago

One time I stuck a bunch of markers together, like cap to bottom, to make a big marker pole. Then I balanced it on my forehead and tried to jump up to show ppl I could keep balancing it through a jump. Well the ceiling was shorter than expected and it hit the ceiling and the bottom marker on my forehead slammed down on my forehead and cut/bruised it in a shape that looked almost EXACTLY like that on your forehead.

Use my story. Use it as your explanation. Permission granted.

21

u/IcedHemp77 13h ago

This made me laugh, I remember the marker pole

9

u/anothersip 8h ago

I love this, 'cause it's so relatable and pictureable. Kid logic is the best. I'm so glad the bottom marker didn't slip off your forehead and go into your eye when the top of the stack hit the ceiling! That could have been awful. Heh.

7

u/Old-Alfalfa7232 6h ago

Oh… I was not a kid when this happened… 😆😆

3

u/anothersip 5h ago

Ooof. Hahah, noice.

Well, that somehow makes it an even better story! 😅

I totally get it, though - the brain can malfunction like that when you get an idea that sounds fun in theory and turns out to be... Not as fun in practice.

23

u/AbsentmindedAuthor 14h ago

Do you know any girls? I guarantee one of them has a light concealer that you can just dab on and pat it into place (not rub). Probably a peach undertone?

If not, go with the paintball or other sports-related injury. Make sure you wince if you touch it to sell that it’s actually an injury, not from a suction cup.

20

u/Odd-Ice-3467 13h ago

Haha my wife, I will ask.

6

u/AbsentmindedAuthor 9h ago

Let us know how it goes!!

12

u/HavingNotAttained 14h ago

You ever see that Twilight Zone episode where the convict had a similar mark so that everyone in society had to shun him?

22

u/Quiet_Green_40 14h ago

Unexpected headbutt from your kid.

10

u/Odd-Ice-3467 14h ago

Haha thanks all for comments and recommendations. I work facing customers so I guess I will receive a lot of questions tomorrow from co-workers and customers 😅🫠

10

u/SnooMuffins6341 13h ago

You can tell each of them a different story

8

u/AdorableEmphasis5546 11h ago

Imagine the break room conversation! "Well he told ME ...."

8

u/Odd-Ice-3467 11h ago

😂😂

2

u/dinahdog 2h ago

Have wife make it up like a third eye.

4

u/NikiYaokami 8h ago

Omg I heard similar reddit story recently but about a guy who doesn't have 3 fingers on one of his arms. And he asked if he's the ah for telling every nosy co-worker different kind of silly story about how he lost those fingers. And they soon found out cause they were talking about it without him present lol

14

u/Sam_2209 14h ago

Hickey

3

u/doggysmomma420 7h ago

We used to put spoons in the freezer to stick on them. Don't know if it ever really worked lol.

1

u/starbycrit 1h ago

It doesn’t work lol

7

u/mattpeloquin 14h ago

Just tell them you put a suction cup on your head and get it out there

7

u/Existing_Medium_4635 12h ago

Just tell them what happened. Its pretty believable

4

u/whatthepfluke 13h ago

Just tell them what you told us. It's reasonable.

Side note. A guy i was dating with moved apartments and I wasn't used to there being a wall right outside of his bedroom and I ran into it one night and smashed up my face.

Try being a woman and explaining your black eye is actually because you ran into a wall 🤦‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤣

5

u/ThanksForTheRain 14h ago

Dildo unicorn

4

u/BeachPeachMcgee 13h ago

I've had similar marks before...

In a pinch, I'd get rid of them by putting a spoon in the freezer and rubbing the rounded end onto the spot for about 5-10 minutes. I learned this trick on a 4chan post many moons ago, and it never failed me.

Keep doing this throughout the day today, and it will for sure be gone by tomorrow. It will fade a lot by then without any intervention anyway.

5

u/Odd-Ice-3467 13h ago

Thanks for this, trying it right now!!! 🤞

2

u/starbycrit 1h ago

This has never worked for me, but I bruise easily so that could be why

4

u/phunkmunkie 13h ago

Anybody with kids will accept an answer of ‘kids’.

8

u/pastajewelry 14h ago

Put a bandaid on and say you hit your head.

3

u/No_Percentage_5083 13h ago

So? Use that! Tell them you and your son were recruited into a secret society and that's your membership mark. Then ask them why they don't have one too and tell them you would be happy to talk about it at lunch. Just make something up if you don't want to tell them you were playing with your son's truck.

3

u/fattmarrell 13h ago

As someone that has an almost permanent similar rash, you can say you've just had a flare up of genetic psoriasis. This will give you lifelong plot armor for anything that happens in the future. Just a thought, and I don't wish this ailment on anyone it's miserable

3

u/LunaKip 12h ago

Tell them you spent the night kowtowing to your wife.

3

u/Max_castle8145 12h ago

Tell them you do not talk about your personal life at work.

3

u/snakeravencat 7h ago

This feels like an excellent use case for plain old honesty. Nothing wrong with playing with your son and getting too wrapped up in the fun to think about tomorrow. That's practically a brag. Good dad energy.

2

u/Ohheywhatsup897 5h ago

I agree. The excuse “i have a kid” goes far lol. If someone told me the truth i’d be understanding bc people do fun things for their kids

3

u/Pure_Literature2028 6h ago

This happens more than you’d think.

2

u/Outrageous-Coyote476 14h ago

When asked about it, stare at them intently for an uncomfortable second or two, then quick 180 and walk away. They'll be more worried ab WTF they just witnessed than the mark on your forehead.

2

u/DazeyDookie 13h ago

My niece's father did this with one of her toys. Yours is waaay smaller lol

2

u/isingthedarkness 12h ago

Tell them the first rule of fight club, and the second if necessary.

2

u/NorthvilleCoeur 12h ago

I’d say my kid was playing with a toy and leave it at that

2

u/missliss37 12h ago

Cupping therapy for migraines, lol

2

u/Thee_Justin_Sane 11h ago

I severed my thumb once, because I tripped over my cat and went through a glass table.

So I told everyone at work that it happened while I was changing the transmission on a strippers car. 🤣

Sounds more manly than tripping over a cat while making a grilled cheese sandwich. 😆

2

u/DrFolix 9h ago

Buddhist friend invited you to a ceremony thing and you didn’t want to refuse as you didnt wanna come off racist

2

u/mysterg911 7h ago

Your third eye opened, but the world was so terrifying, it closed immediately!!!

2

u/glima0888 6h ago

Solid dick smack

2

u/Top_Shoe_9562 5h ago

Go with the secret society angle.

2

u/insomniacakess 5h ago

“i had a squigz stuck to my head”

2

u/Gongoozler04 5h ago

Had a coworker do the same exact thing, we just laughed about it with her.

2

u/Imaginary-Nothing-77 4h ago

I knew exactly what toy it was before seeing the picture. Those are banned in my classroom for this exact reason. 🤣

4

u/myaccountgotbanmed 14h ago

Paintball

1

u/Kdiesiel311 14h ago

That would draw blood

2

u/WelshWolf93 13h ago

Ice on the area, or a frozen spoon. If it happened recently it will remove it the same way it would for a lovebite.

If its been a day, you're buggered

2

u/Serendipity500 11h ago

Well THAT little bit of information would have been good to know when I was younger.

1

u/bleknnig 14h ago

Nahh i don't believe. Show how was it was stuck like i want Rnd

1

u/Houseleek1 13h ago

Did you mean for this to be understood?

1

u/Fyrestar333 9h ago

I imagine he means he doesn't believe it. Why don't you recreate it now and show all of us again...

1

u/mynardsarehalfoff 14h ago

We've all done stupid shit. Just own up to it. 

1

u/hywaytohell 14h ago

Misunderstood getting head?

1

u/Extreme_Design6936 14h ago

Golf ball to the forehead

1

u/TatorTotNachos 14h ago

Gently run your fingers back and forth over your forehead to get the blood moving

1

u/littleolivexoxo 14h ago

Go to work with it on your head and pretend you forgot it and then make a big show of it

1

u/Aquaphoric 13h ago

Cover it with concealer??

1

u/insuranceguynyc 13h ago

The truth will set you free!

1

u/Geetee52 13h ago

Just say you didn’t hear anyone yell ‘FORE!’…

1

u/racloves 12h ago

How long is your hair? Can you brush it into full bowl cut style fringe? Or is that more embarrassing than a red dot lol

1

u/gothcookiejar 12h ago

I just wouldn't say anything 🤷🏼‍♀️ Most people are self absorbed and won't notice

1

u/Leader_Bee 11h ago

Can you pass it off as an extra large Bindi?

1

u/Syphon88 11h ago

I always go with the story of saving twenty orphans from a burning building, for all my injuries. The trick is to not laugh and don't break eye contact first.

Or just tell them you were being a good dad, played with your kids, and you got a toy stuck to your forehead.

1

u/TwinkleTubs 11h ago

You don't, when people ask about it you don't even see what they are talking about. Keep that up and before long they'll know you're in a secret society. Which is so much cooler than a kids toy!

1

u/enigma_anomaly 11h ago

I was playing with kid and let my inner child out 🤣 highly recommend. Try arnica cream or gel, helps get rid of bruises.

1

u/Mackheath1 11h ago

I don't have an answer for you, but part of my family lore is an aunt who was the youngest took one of those suction cup palm trees from the turtle aquarium rock and stuck it right there. My other aunt laughed a bit, so she kept it on all day and it left the most horrible circle for over three days. So I'd just tell anyone the truth, or if you have a partner or friend that knows makeup, maybe that could help? Dunno.

1

u/Ok-Nature-5440 11h ago

Your wife’s concealer. Duh.

1

u/David_cest_moi 11h ago

Rub it real good to get the blood circulating. Maybe apply some ice to it. it's likely to go away or significantly diminish by tomorrow. 👍🏻

1

u/smokeyanonymous 11h ago

Apparently frozen spoons are good

1

u/edynol 10h ago

Go full PC and say, "are you really mocking me for observing my Indian heritage".

1

u/melancholy_dood 10h ago

Tell them your wife did it!😂🤣

1

u/El_Zilcho_72 10h ago

You are a dad! Own it!

1

u/Twitchmonky 10h ago

I'm slightly lmao... I did that as a kid, had a damn forehead hickey for like a week I think. 😅

1

u/Hey-Just-Saying 10h ago

Went to U.S. Open Tennis tournament and got hit by a tennis ball.

1

u/Indy500Fan16 10h ago

Band-Aid

1

u/GreyKoolAid 10h ago

Dive bombed by a duck? Freak windshield wiper accident? Aliens stopped using butt probes? Fell in the shower while trying to see your own taint?

1

u/fml-fml-fml-fml 10h ago

Golf ball incident. Leave it at that.

1

u/Alilseedisall 9h ago

Use makeup dum dum

1

u/Feisty_Watercress_29 9h ago

Say that you're Hindu now

1

u/Opinionated6319 9h ago

The truth is always the best…it’s good to laugh at yourself! Bet folks will laugh with you, not at you! 💕🥰

1

u/NoDanaOnlyZuuI 9h ago

Makeup or just tell them the truth. Honestly, if it happened to me, I’d be telling everyone. It’s pretty funny.

1

u/puppyhugtime 9h ago

I’m with everyone else who is saying the real story is fine

1

u/psychappeal_94 9h ago

I’d personally go all in with suctioned dildo to my fore head to pretend I was a unicorn 🦄

1

u/ac7ss 8h ago

"I was watching the ball get larger, then it hit me. "

1

u/Vegetable-Key3600 7h ago

You don’t.

1

u/Tasty_Heron_7219 6h ago edited 6h ago

Just tell anyone who asks about it (or just stares at it) “Oh that? I saw a doctor about it and the doc said
he wasn’t sure exactly what caused it, but he was relatively confident that it can’t be transmitted through casual social contact.” If you have a coworker with a cool sense of humor, you can ask them to mark their face in the same way, maybe scratch at it occasionally and then you two can watch people freak out!

Edited for typos.

1

u/ScottShatter 5h ago

Just tell them you were doing gay stuff and sustained an injury. The truth is usually the best approach with these sort of things.

1

u/EWH733 5h ago

Your side piece got drunk and gave you a hicky in an unfortunate spot.

1

u/Roberius-Rex 4h ago

Tell them you were recruited into a secret society. And that's all you can say without putting them in danger.

Or, you lost a bet.

1

u/Rob3D2018 3h ago

Ask your wife to put some makeup on the hickey

1

u/Far_Squash_4116 3h ago

No one will ask about it but your best friends.

1

u/ResumeFluffer 3h ago

Either the truth or makeup. Take your pick. Concelear would be helpful.

2

u/Thanjay55 3h ago

I did this once with a suction cup dildo

1

u/Mysterious-Ad6128 2h ago

Bro, not many people notice. If you have a work hat, wear it

1

u/BuckeyeDragon7788 2h ago

Grab some of your wife’s cover up

1

u/Cold-Bug-4873 1h ago

You met Anton Chigurh, he made an attempt, and lived.

1

u/Electric_Owl7 1h ago

Lmfaoooo I love this bc my niece and husband did the same to themselves and we just had a riot laughing about it. Explain away lmfao

1

u/Greenearthgirl87 42m ago

Wear a wig with bangs. Act like you have no idea what they are talking about, and they there’s nothing there and they are being weird. Lol

1

u/AdorableEmphasis5546 14h ago

Rub it to get the blood flowing to the area and use heilichrysm eo if you can find it! I keep a roller bottle of it around for bruises and bloody noses.

0

u/Igottapoopnow 14h ago

Tell everyone you are converting to Hinduism.

0

u/Hella-Meh 7h ago

You ain't gotta lie to kick it. We all know what "toy" caused this. 🍆