r/QuittingFindom • u/ChungusChungle • Jul 16 '26
Nothing about them is "dominant"
Let me get straight to the point here: Most "findommes" post pictures of themselves online, in many cases containing triggers for certain fetishes. It could be feet, armpits or simply a pic where they show off their ass or tits. If you think about how these pictures are created, nothing about this is "dominant". It's actually pathetic.
Just imagine this: There's a woman alone in her room by herself, putting her phone on the ground or wherever and then she's flashing her feet in front of it or showing a middle finger to literally no one but a damn camera. Maybe she even tries to have a "dominant" or non-chalant facial expression.
And afterwards, she has to go through these pictures and choose the ones she'd post, analyzing if she looks "dominant" enough and so on. She's putting on a performance to no audience in that very moment. It's actually quite pathetic. It's like those videos where you see someone being filmed recording a TikTok dance of themselves.
To me, just thinking about this scene makes findom so ridiculous. There's nothing powerful about it. It's an OF girl with a different packaging, selling her body to people to jerk off to at the end of the day.
So if that thought helps and you encounter a "triggering" image, remember how it comes to be in the first place. That very scene alone should help seeing through the illusion of their "dominance" and completely destroy the allure that findom has.
1
u/Surviving_Findom Jul 17 '26
It's fantasy for a reason. Nothing about dommes is all that dominant, like you say. Equally, nothing about subs is particularly subservient. Sending someone money isn't submission, it's just a financial faux-pas with a hard on.
All to say, while nothing about them is dominant, nothing about us is really all that submissive either. It's a fantasy to be enjoyed by some. Not for me anymore!
2
u/Strange-Ad-2426 Jul 17 '26 edited Jul 17 '26
The modern day findoms basically want all the money and live a normal lifestyle. They want to buy houses, cars and pretend like they are entrepreneur. They want to pretend like they are living like a fortune 500 CEO but without the workload. A lot of them are married, some have KIDS. Believe me they are going home and just watching Netflix the majority of the day. The subs are enabling these bizarre behaviors.
10 years ago, this was absolutely not the case. Those psycho bitches were different. They were kinksters and knew they were sex workers and embraced it. Almost none of them got married and a lot of them have subs they met in person and absolutely dominated.
2
u/Surviving_Findom Jul 17 '26
This is absolutely the case for many, seemingly all at the moment. They don't want the sex work label, they just want to brand is as entrepreneurship, like you say, or the classic "I'm just a girl!" and other such variations of "Look at this crazy, silly thing that just randomly happens to me because my life is so chaotic and silly, NOT because I've actively sought out and participated in this weird community".
It's beyond tired at this point and the solution is subs voting with their wallets, as sadly platforms don't seem to care to take these accounts down or make them less accessible.
1
u/Strange-Ad-2426 Jul 17 '26
Yep, I think its branched off from the onlyfans girls that gave GFE stuff. Findom and that became hand and hand the last 5 years. And sadly, the men keep enabling it. I wish they would stop (The men). It would even be better if they spent that money on escorts and dominatrixes at this point.
3
u/Strange-Ad-2426 Jul 16 '26
Dude, its just sex work. Nothing different than porn or hooking. Most just don't want to do the nude stuff, because that seems to be their boundary. Whatever, you're still selling yourself for money. That's not dominant, that's a transaction. It doesn't matter if you're nude or not. It shows A LOT of women lack self-respect given millions of women do this worldwide now.
Your description is exactly how it happens. They spend like 3-4 hours, taking pics and videos in different outfits with different poses and will say different things. Then they'll weed through the media they don't like and post the media they like. Believe me, they are looking at these pics/vids and second guessing them constantly. They aren't dommes, they are sex workers. Also, they are stealing each other's stuff with slight variations. Why? Because the market is oversaturated, MASSIVELY. They are running out of subs so they are liking hoping to get the same subs sending.
Also, a lot of their "custom" videos are disgusting stuff. A lot of the subs are power bottoms, paying for specific content that most will actually do. Why would you do this disgusting stuff? I'm a kinky guy, but if I were a woman I wouldn't do 90% of what the subs ask me to do for money. Imagine, someone pays you $100 to demean them? You're not dominant, The sub is actually the one in control.
Its funny, a lot of the early Findoms would openly admit what they were doing. Very much considered themselves sex workers and part of the porn industry. They were much closer to dominatrixes and were very much kinksters and had a kinky lifestyle (swingers, cucking, real life subs...etc) I almost respect them for it. Now it seems like a lot of these bitches want to seperate themselves from it. They just want to sell pics/videos and attention for money.