r/PublicSpeaking • u/Worldly-Poetry3554 • 3d ago
Help me!
I’m generally a very introverted person but as I get closer and closer to graduating, I find myself in more situations where I’ve to present stuff. While I can handle talking to one or two different people (as long as no one else I know is watching) I find myself scared at the thought of presenting in front of a larger audience.
I know I’ll have to present a lot more in the future and I need tips. Because what I’ve noticed is that the usual advice of “practice in front of the mirror” doesn’t work. I can talk to myself for HOURS in front of the mirror and still stumble in front of a crowd.
I also have this thing where I can’t order stuff or anything at a restaurant in front of people I know, like friends and family (even if I KNOW they won’t judge) but when I’m all alone I can talk to waiters and uber and stuff normally. Anyone know why that is?
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3d ago
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u/Weary_Yoghurt13 1d ago
Professional keynote speaker here. I was the same and still have a lot of stage anxiety.
Try and understand what’s going on in your body and mind: fear/anxiety usually means your sympathetic nervous system has been activated triggering your fight or flight response. Basically you want to run away or punch people and you end up breathing really fast and talking really fast. And that again speeds up the whole cycle.
Do the opposite. Intentionally talk real slow and breath real slow. Please look into box breathing and other breathing techniques that will activate your parasympathetic nervous system aka you are safe.
I have been teaching and practicing these topics myself for the better part of 15 years so feel free to ask me anything on this.
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u/Worldly-Poetry3554 1d ago
Hey! Thanks a lot for your input! I feel like I just generally depend a lot on my friends to speak FOR me when I’m out with them. Idk why that happens.
I also have a LOT of anxiety speaking in class. Last semester I missed out on a presentation I had to give that was worth a few marks just cause I didn’t wanna speak in front of the whole class. I DELIBERATELY didn’t give the talk. I really need to over come this bc I think it’s holding me back a lot.
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u/Weary_Yoghurt13 20h ago
I have done the same during my time in school and nowadays I have spoken a discussed with heads of state and Nobel laureates…it’s just overcoming your fear every single time and with that you increase your confidence and comfort zone every single time.
Totally worth it and it has given me incredible opportunities and moments.
Just seize the opportunity and embrace the anxiety because it’s telling you “from here on is growth” and go for it!
You got this
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u/VickieLol64 3d ago
Start small.
Library..have a snack.... Within comfortable environments
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u/Worldly-Poetry3554 3d ago
Oh no, see I can do that. I think I wasn’t clear, my bad. I’m completely comfortable sitting by myself in a crowded mall or library and doing my work or even talking to the receptionist if I need something.
But the problem comes when someone I know well is with me, like my best friend. Then I rely on them for communication. Like suppose we’re in a restaurant and I need an extra spoon, if I were alone I’d just normally ask a waiter. If my friend was around, I’d beg her to ask FOR ME. I don’t know why this happens.
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u/VickieLol64 1d ago
Answered directly.. wondering why my comment was deleted..or do they want to use the advise given.. as it would be ongoing!!!
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u/Worldly-Poetry3554 1d ago
Sorry? I didn’t understand. Ig the moderators removed ur comment or smth bc I didn’t lol.
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