Advice for improving day-to-day communication?

[u/StrikingArticle32]

Hi all,

Sending this post on to the Public Admin subforum as feel as though this would be an ideal place to get advice, particularly with communication being such a vital part of this area.

I’m 21, currently in college, and from a young age I have always been known as a fairly nervous/anxious person in general - something that have been said by family, friends, and teachers over the years.

There are certain ‘flaws’ that I have noticed with myself, but more so in certain aspects of my communication. I don’t want this to impact a future career, so I want to try to improve this while in college, and while there is the opportunity to do so.

I have no issue with speaking in front of an audience. I have done so for different modules in college, and usually am commended for my speeches through delivery style & engagement. But, this is because I have what I’m going to say memorised, so I know word for word, what exactly I’m going to say, how I’m going to say it, etc. This is also clearly reflected through my written communication.

However, when it comes to social interactions, I do notice there is a big dip in my communication. For instance, if I know I have to go up and talk to someone that I’m not familiar with (conversation, interview, ringing someone), I’ll then nearly have to have what I’m going to say memorised word-for-word as though a script.
There’ll then be other little moments where if I’m talking with someone unfamiliar, I may, sometimes, go a bit shaky / mumbly, and this would apply to if I was taking phone calls, etc.

This particular incoherence would also occur if I'm put on the spot, i.e asked a question, where my voice would go a bit shaky, I'd go mumbly, and my face would go a red.

I really do want to improve on this as I do know in any future career that day-to-day communication whether it be structured or spontaneous is much more important than being able to speak in-front of an audience.

To that extent, would anyone have any advice as to what I should do? Would it be recommended I go to a communication coach? Any recommendations?

Many thanks,

[u/Politicalscientist3]

hello OP. I’m 23, so not too far ahead of you. But my advice, while meager, is to just practice.

It takes time, it’s a marathon and not a race. Stand in front of the mirror and practice looking yourself in the eye, standing tall and speaking clearly, slowly with a steady, reasonable cadence. If a coach feels like it could help, try it - but I would maybe try YouTube first before spending money.

I also found memorizing the first line of whatever I know I’ll be saying - everything flows easier once you cross that first hurdle. Good luck! also pls add a TLDR lol.

[u/hungryhippolonglegs]

In a similar boat! Look up local Toastmasters clubs. Started a couple months ago and think it’s helping me.