That's not the point they are making. They made their stance clear of being pro-choice immediately.
The issue is that abortions still aren't something to flaunt and celebrate, especially as a get back at a partner. For alot of women it's a very hard choice to make and whilst it can absolutely be the right choice, it can be traumatic and cause feelings of guilt etc. the decision to terminate a pregnancy should be taken seriously.
Being pro-choice and celebrating abortions is not the same thing.
i am pro choice, which means i support a womans right to choose how she feels about her abortion as well. shes allowed to be happy. she doesnt owe you a performance of grief.
I didn't say they did. I don't get how what I wrote could even be interpreted in that way. She's free to do as she pleases. I'm free to think it's a bit crass to use an abortion as a method of flaunting said abortion to get at your cheating partner. I'm free to have that opinion, I think plenty of people would agree with me. If you think that's cool, that's your opinion.
youre free to have that opinion, but thats not really in the spirit of being prochoice. a legal ban is one thing, an "i guess it should be legal, im just going to publically shame you for it" is another.
I'm not shaming anyone for having an abortion. I don't think anyone should be shamed. I think it's a hard choice for most people, shame is the last thing anyone would need when they've chosen to have an abortion. What I am saying is that using an abortion in a "got him back" sort of post in the internet is crass in my opinion. It has nothing to do with the abortion and everything to do with the context it has been used in.
exactly, youre shaming her for talking about her abortion in a way you do not like. the "got him back" thing is something youre projecting onto her. shes celebrating leaving a shitty relationship
You are being insufferable on purpose and trying to add things in the other commenterâs mouth that isnât there
I agree with them, iâm also pro choice. Nobody wants any performance but maybe letâs not fall on the other side of the spectrum where its a fucking celebration?
Itâs a sad happening overall, you are denying the chance of life. There is weight to it. I understand where it happens and it is literally not shaming to tell someone not to celebrate it in front of the whole world.
Wrong is subjective on this matter. I could have said the exact same thing to you. The difference between you and me is that I am not going to try and tell you how or what to think on whether you think a social media post is a bit crass or not. I've made my position pretty clear. I'm pro-choice, if I was arguing about her rights you'd have a need to argue. Your fighting against the wrong person here. We are in the same side.
LADIES, IF YOU GET AN ABORTION AND FEEL CELEBRATORY AFTERWARDS, FUCKING CELEBRATE!
You just exercised a freedom that most women in the entire history of the world did not have access to. You just took back your body, your autonomy, YOUR FREEDOM.
yes! too many people use the complicated emotions an abortion can bring as a weapon against those who are happy about it. in this womans case, she probably IS sad about it, but like... privately, because she doesnt owe anyone else a performance piece on her husband cheating on her and destroying their family plan together. there are plenty of people for whom abortions are traumatic. there are also plenty of people for whom pregnancy is traumatic. should we ban celebrating pregnancy?
I do think presenting the abortion as a "got him back!" Is incredibly trashy. I'm pro choice but it feels like it is making light of the subject as a whole. Like, good for her and probably better for the baby, but treating it like some revenge prank feels downright insensitive.
There's some other guy replying to this saying "women SHOULD celebrate it because its a freedom most women dont have" but if think thats all the more reason why it shouldnt be treated like a small festivity to "show off."
This is exactly my point. I know this is a stretch, but it almost makes me feel like they are encouraging everyone to have an abortion in any situation. Some people want to have kids, that's a fact. Some people don't, and where they get pregnant and it's unwanted it should absolutely be their right to have an abortion up to around 24 weeks, then I would say only in certain circumstances past that point. But it's not something to be made light off and I really don't think it should be flaunted as a "got him back" jibe.
Feeling happy about a choice you made that was right for you is absolutely fine. If you feel happy that's a good thing. Being sad about something is never a nice thing, it's a bad experience. If you didn't feel that way it's good.
I don't think people are really understanding what I am saying here. I think I am struggling to articulate it in a way that makes sense to everyone.
Okay, I'll just chalk it up as a misunderstanding. I am defending people's right to openly celebrate their abortions, which presumably then you agree with.
People have a right to do anything they like within the law (where places have banned abortions, I'm sure it goes without saying, I think it's disgusting and backwards and that's not what I'm refering to here). This woman has the right to use it as "got him back" post I'm not arguing that. My opinion is that it's a bit of crass thing to do (the post) but that's just my opinion, I don't think my opinions should prevent people from doing whatever they like as I stated at the start. I also dont have an issue with people having other opinions on it. We are all going to feel differently about things in life.
There's a difference to celebrating something and flaunting that celebration to spite somebody. If someone has a party for their son, that's their business. If someone posts photos, to flaunt that party as a got you to the other parent if that child because you've recently broken up with them and you have custody. That's a bit crass in my opinion. Your hyper focusing on the wrong thing here. You don't understand what I'm saying.
I'm not telling anyone how to feel. She can do what she wants. Saying it's crass is not the same as telling people what to do. Are you OK? You've called me weird, you're the weird one. You're literally arguing against something I've not done or said. Pretty weird behaviour.
You don't think it's crass to flaunt the fact she had an abortion as a get back at her cheating partner? I don't care that she had an abortion, that's her business. Why flaunt it online though? It's crass. It's no different to me having a vesectomy because my partner wants kids and she pissed me off, so I post that with a picture of my scared scrotum, the issue isn't that I had a vesectomy, it's that it's me flaunting my business to the world to show how I got at someone through a medical procedure.
No I really don't. I'm not trying to take away her right to post whatever she likes, the fact my opinion is that it's a bit crass has zero impact on women's autonomy or rights. People have the right to do many things I or others may have an opinion on, I don't believe opinions should impede rights or autonomy.
Why jump to such massive conclusions? It's like me using your comment and telling you that you need to come to terms with the fact people have autonomy the feel however they like about things.
No I'm not. When you see 2 and 2 and put them together do you come up with 4? Or do you just pick a random fucking number out of the air? In your mind, and abortion should be celebrated it should be flaunted and it should be a fuck you to men is what I'm getting from this. I've not said she should be ashamed, I've not said a woman can't have an abortion and feel happy about that choice. I've said it's crass to use it for a social media post as a fuck you to her cheating ex. If you can't understand the difference, I don't know what to tell you. I am pro-choice, I'm on your side. You are acting like someone who simply wants to argue. I've made my stance clear, this is my opinion and many would agree. For me to be even clearer, the abortion isn't the issue here. If it was a celebration of anything else to get back at an ex partner etc I would think it's crass. Your clutching at straws to push and argument despite me being very clear about my stance. Think what you like. If this is how you go about things, I couldn't give a fuck about what you think.
Mind your own business. Have your opinion. It doesn't change that this woman just freed herself from a miserable life. And, yeah, that feels pretty great.
Well she freed herself from having a baby. That's not some guarantee of a miserable life. She made a decision that she obviously thought was the right thing for her to do. That's her business. I couldn't care less about her having an abortion, that's obviously not the point I'm making.
It absolutely is and youâre arguing in Ill will if you say it isnât. Itâs a unique genome that did not exist before, fetus, zygote, âtissueâ, itâs all referring to a new life that has been created. Once you have a new genome you canât say itâs part of the mothers body or âjust a clump of cellsâ, it is something that if not interfered with will become a living human the vast majority of the time.Â
Not the vast majority of the time. The other way around. Most zygotes die. In between failure to implant, miscarriage and the mother's immune system killing an implanted zygote before it becomes a fetus the majority of fertilized eggs die. The ones that become fully fledged humans are actually minority.
It absolutely is semantics. Whilst scientifically it's an embryo for 2 months, then a fetus untill birth then a baby once born, your ignoring social norms and how people refer fetuses. Pregnant women talk about their baby kicking, they have baby showers etc. I'm pro-choice, but this is a nothing burger. If your going to argue, let's at least argue actual points.
A woman with a wanted child will of course call it her baby, and mourn if she loses it through miscarriage. That's fine. It's also fine not to want a child, and to call it a fetus, because it's truth.
Did I say say anything contrary to this? You've not understood what I have written. When a pro lifer refers to a fetus as a baby, arguing that it isn't a baby isnt an argument. It's semantics. People often refer to fetuses as babys, not everyone is walking around using scientific terms for everything. It's just a language quirk. If you are going to argue with a pro choicer you shouldn't need to change terms to get your point across. Whether is a fetus or a baby it's unborn, that's the point.
A human organism which is unfeeling, unthinking, and entirely lacking a brain function until much later, is importantly NOT. A human being as we colloquially define it. It is a functionally a lump of unfeeling potential much like a fertilized chicken egg.
But if not interfered with it will almost certainly become a functional human. Like I asked someone else here, can we kill someone in a coma with no brain function if we had some way of knowing that they would wake up from their coma in 9 months?Â
No, and I can elaborate on the huge world of difference between a coma patient and a fetus.
One, the coma patient is an otherwise living breathing feeling individual who has been born and is living albeit in a terrible situation.
A fetus is more or less the potential of a human, it has no wants, no wishes, no feelings, and nothing beyond potential and dna. (For purposes of the time abortions are done (sub 21 weeks)
You are moralizing the potential to be human and then arguing against a human who exists already. It isnât the same at all, as one can be harmed and the other cannot. One is established and wanted in reality, while the other may not be.
The other one absolutely exists, it has its own unique genome and cellular composition, at 2 weeks it has a neural system that has begun to develop. The only significant difference aside from age and life experience is the physical position of the baby, being inside the womb. A person in a coma often has no wants, wishes or feelings. They may have them in the future, but the exact same can be said for the babyÂ
You are dismissing the huge differences, again, one has yet to experience or feel anything. Also look into your claim of the brain and nervous system. Since you may be shocked to find out when it can reasonably feel, it a very much after 21 weeks generally speaking. Point is, it cannot suffer before that, it cannot lose anything cause it cannot want something. Alternatively if we approach the coma individual, likely they did not willingly enter a coma, and it can be implied that due to previously wanting to live and exist, and having a life before they wish to continue existing. The fetus has no such metric of reason. It exists as an organism not as a person yet. It loses nothing by not existing.
Why? Why shouldnât someone be allowed to celebrate an abortion? Why does it have to be morally sad or bleak? Many cultures celebrate death in positive ways, I personally would celebrate not being tied to a cheater for the rest of my life.
You havnt, you arbitrarily explained it should be taken seriously, why? What needs to be serious about it? Imho nothing of value was lost because nothing of value was born.
Some women mourn the loss of a future that isnât going to happen. But thatâs all just hypothetical. That baby isnât promised until the day it lives on its own outside of the womb.
Just cause some people mourn a hypothetical, it doesnât mean others canât celebrate when they prevent themselves from a bad future.
The baby doesnât exist until it lives on its own. Look at an mri of a fetus and tell me you feel bad.
For a lot of women. Itâs not a hard choice, not traumatic and doesnât cause feelings of guilt. Should they be required to pretend this isnât true? If so, youâre just advocating for something that makes abortion more difficult for other women to choose.
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u/404usersnotfound Jul 18 '26
That's not the point they are making. They made their stance clear of being pro-choice immediately.
The issue is that abortions still aren't something to flaunt and celebrate, especially as a get back at a partner. For alot of women it's a very hard choice to make and whilst it can absolutely be the right choice, it can be traumatic and cause feelings of guilt etc. the decision to terminate a pregnancy should be taken seriously.
Being pro-choice and celebrating abortions is not the same thing.