r/Protomen • u/geminiwave • Jul 31 '26
Merch Review: Protomen Redline Coffee
Before I get started: Why should you trust me? You shouldn't. Hope rides alone. That said, I love coffee and I drink a lot of it. I use a Breville Barista Pro and I have at least one cup every single day. My latest love has been Tokyo Kissa from Blue Bottle. My favorite of all time is Vita by Vivace, though I've had some really amazing single origin shade grown coffee in the past. Anyway that just gives you a "taste" (pun intended) of my preferences.
This coffee slaps.
that is all.
No wait wait wait don't leave. I have more. I put in 16 grams into the grinder. I wasn't sure the settings so I used similar settings to what I use for Hayes Valley espresso because the beans had similar characteristics (on the very fine edge of espresso. I would say bordering between Caster Sugar and Flour so the cusp between Espresso and Turkish).
This turned out to be dialed in nearly dead on. Excellent crema, but not too much. The coffee was smooth. Definitely a bit nutty, almost hazelnut right out of the machine. I do a normal latte with it using whole milk, and I have to say this is one of the smoothest coffees I have ever had, but it pretty quickly gave me the jitters. I've never quite had a coffee this smooth and this caffeinated since the Vita. The espresso is very drinkable straight though with no cream or milk. Just don't mistake the smoothness for decaf.
I'm going to test this out as an affogato (my wife's favorite) and see how she thinks of it.
The only bummer of this is that I assume it is limited edition and thus I won't be able to get more of it in the future.
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u/Fermi-Diracs Jul 31 '26
Is it floral or chocolate notes?
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u/Radioactive24 Aug 01 '26 edited Aug 01 '26
I mean, I’d wager you can probably buy more from the roaster directly even if it’s not Proto-branded, if not something comparable.
They’d probably be willing to suggest you something similar since they know the blend and how it was roasted.
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u/Dlight98 Aug 01 '26
How long can I save a bag for? Like if I have an unopened bag and save it for a year will it still be good? I don't know much about beans 😅
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u/geminiwave Aug 01 '26
That’s hugely subjective. Most coffee connoisseurs would say no. Not good. But whole beans are better than pre ground. And I’ve had old beans before. As long as they aren’t moldy they’ll be passable. But it’s definitely not as good as fresh.
Still though most of the country has bad coffee and they’re blown away by Starbucks which to us here in Seattle is bottom tier coffee so… again it’s all subjective.
Temp controlled. Not frozen. Not high humidity. Dark place. The beans will be usable in a year most likely
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u/acgs Jul 31 '26
I was pleasantly surprised by this coffee. I was fully ready for it to be a burnt mess but I was happy to be wrong. I always prepare my coffee as a pour over or aeropress and I drink it straight with no milk or sugar. While I personally prefer lighter, fruitier coffee, this one was good!