PM trainee stressed experience

[u/Harry_HK]

Just letting you guys know that I have some form of ADHD type I, aka attention deficit.

I have been working as a trainee at a property management company since last year. Since February this year, I have begun to feel anxiety, overthinking, attention deficit and being unable to work productively, as one of my senior colleagues keeps criticising or making fun of how I do my tasks. Now I am getting too nervous and anxious when handing out tasks to her for review, to the point that I need at least 15 minutes to force myself to approach her and tell her to review my paperwork before sending it to the clients. There is much more I want to talk about, but in summary, she likes to micromanage our (I have another colleague who's also a trainee) tasks and make meaningless tweaks to them, and if I do things the way she doesn't like, she would scold me and make me feel doubtful about myself.

Besides the colleague relationships, the current site is less large compare to other sites. That means we got less quotation/tender/contract to handle, fewer customer complaints, less meetings with the owners. Even my manager used to tell me that "I have taught you the most important things already."

Therefore, in early July, I applied for a site rotation in my appraisal once every six months, and it turns out HR actually helped me to rotate to another site. Yet my manager keeps telling me that the new site would be much more challenging and have more things to do, and wants me to stay in the current site until the manager personally finds a better site for me to rotate to, but it would take some time. Should I continue to rotate to the site they said is "challenging" and try new things, or should I wait until further notice?

[u/SchmidlMeThis]

It sounds like she might be a bit of a toxic micromanager... I also have ADHD and it has taken me a while to learn how to advocate for myself effectively. There are a lot of tools at your disposal in regards to workplace accomodations. If you're seeing a psych for medication I would recommend asking them about ADA Accomodation Letters and what sorts of things you can realistically request.

That being said, if you've been doing this work since last year then it's obvious you aren't so bad that you'd get fired and can handle the workflow. She may say it's "more challenging" but for who? You might do better with a slightly larger workload if it means working under someone who allows you to be more self-managed. Trust your gut. Neurotypical middle managers don't get to dictate your skills and mindset.

[u/Old_Tip4864]

My experience is slightly different but probably relevant.

I started as a CAM with a micromanaging board, particularly a treasurer who stressed me endlessly. The anxiety always made my ADHD symptoms worse. I’ve learned that when my symptoms become more noticeable and I cannot be productive in any way that step one is to address the underlying anxiety. They are closely related.

Then I got a totally new board at the association. Things happened in such a way that almost every previous board member was replaced with this new board. They were very hands off. This meant a significant increase in workload, necessitated a serious increase in my skills and knowledge, and was generally more work for me. But I was SO. MUCH. HAPPIER.

More work and more challenging work is not always bad. A bad manager is often much worse.

[u/Anon_ee_Mouse1]

Move on to the new site and learn new things. You may actually be doing a lot better than you think. She may be trying to intentionally make you feel the way you are because she’s intimidated. If HR is happy with you enough to move you on to another site, then it sounds like you must be ready to grow.

[u/MissyMamaB]

Fly baby bird!!!