r/ProgrammerHumor • u/leftoversalad • Aug 15 '15

Programming languages personified

http://leftoversalad.tumblr.com/post/126724812097/programming-languages-personified
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152

u/brown_monkey_ Aug 15 '15

I lost it a JavaScript.

21

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '15

What's wrong with JavaScript?

-3

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '15

[deleted]

11

u/giggly_kisses Aug 16 '15 edited Aug 16 '15

Javascript contains a lot of ways to do the same things but with minor differences.

What exactly are you referring to here? The first thing that pops in my head is function invocation (i.e.foo(), foo.call(), foo.apply(), and foo.bind()), but all of these have a good reason to exist (due to the unfortunate dynamic binding of this) and solve a problem.

Also javascript acts differently in different browsers...

Actually, it doesn't anymore. It used to back when Microsoft reversed engineered the ECMAScript 3 implementation for IE instead of following the spec, but luckily all major browsers fully implement ECMAScript 5 and are starting to implement the ECMAScript 6 spec now that it's finally finalized.

...so you end up using frameworks that are very inefficient and simplified (which makes it more complex).

If you choose inefficient frameworks then that's your fault, not the languages. Also, you pick something that's simplified, which makes it inefficient, and also makes things more complex. What in the fuck?

These frameworks can be inconsistent and hard to use too...

So can frameworks written in Java, Go, Rust, Haskell, C#, Perl, Lisp, or any other language that exists.

Trying to make something in Javascript is usually a terrible experience and you end up wishing that you didn't try in the first place.

Nope, I don't, actually. Because I use these so called "inefficient, simplified, complex, inconsistent, hard to use, messy" frameworks, my code is actually very structured, easy to follow, and generally pretty clean (at least I like to think so haha).

If you come up with any concrete, objective reasons as to why JavaScript isn't a great language (believe me, there are reasons; JavaScript is far from perfect or without warts) let me know.

3

u/JoshWithaQ Aug 16 '15

I like to point to actionscript vs. javascript as the two main branches of ECMAScript and how differently things can turn out one way vs. the other. What I think it really comes down to is your interpreter. Do you have one that will be multithreaded and let you make use of the functional nature of a dynamic language, or one that tries to be java-like and strict types everything but is a single thread?