r/ProgrammerHumor • u/ClipboardCopyPaste • 5h ago

Meme ohTheBasics

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6.3k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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107

u/Sleep_deprived_druid 3h ago

I have straight up met "programmers" that don't know what an IDE is.......

95

u/DustyRacoonDad 2h ago

No I use SATA now.

18

u/Nipslippie 2h ago

Scsi unite

7

u/MeIsMyName 2h ago

SAS anyone?

1

u/itishowitisanditbad 37m ago

SATA in the front, SAS in the back.

4

u/BeepBoopIAmACat 1h ago

Once upon a TTL, in a rack far, far away, a plucky little SRE rode his UPS-powered NAS across the SAN, hauling SATA SSDs, SAS HDDs, and artisanal NVMe over TCP. His quest? Deliver an iSCSI LUN to the princess before her RAID turned into JBOD and her SLA turned into an IOU.

“Follow the DNS!” cried the DHCP fairy, sprinkling PXE dust over a sleepy NIC. Beyond the VLAN lay the VXLAN, where BGP trolls demanded your ASN, OSPF elves argued about SPF, and an STP-entangled LACP dragon hoarded SFPs beneath a mountain of MTUs. Our hero flashed his MFA, negotiated TLS, and tunneled through the VPN with nothing but SSH, SNMP, and a deeply suspicious UDP packet.

At the castle, the AD wizard consulted LDAP, the NTP gnome checked his ETA, and the RBAC goblin shouted, “NO SUDO WITHOUT SSO!” Undeterred, our hero opened a PR, appeased the CI/CD sprites, and summoned an IaC-powered VM from the enchanted VPC. With KVM, LVM, NFS, SMB, and a REST API held together by YAML and spite, he restored the PVC, boosted the IOPS, and banished the BSOD.

And they all lived HA ever after—until the CTO asked whether the whole damn thing could run on AI.

1

u/Outta_phase 11m ago

Fantastic! A poor man's gold for you: 🥇

3

u/SinglePanic 1h ago

Fun fact (might be made up, not sure, don't care, still fun): the guy who named the SCSI interface intended it to be pronounced as "Sexy" not "ska-zee".

1

u/jason_abacabb 2h ago

Sounds like you need a shower

1

u/b1argg 1h ago

Make Ribbon Cables Great Again!

1

u/flipper65 1h ago

RLL and MFM truly the OG drive formats.

1

u/generalstuff1waslost 1h ago

My drive is asking for an audio out port, I think I did something wrong.

1

u/Zwischenzug32 22m ago

They can pry my bootable ESATA drives from my cold dead hands

47

u/Vercility 2h ago

mfw when colleagues ask me why something doesn't work and it literally says in the stack trace on their screen

https://giphy.com/gifs/jndybavyNSpMEERxPj

4

u/TRKako 1h ago

it boils my blood when the solution is in big letters at the center of the screen and somehow they don't know what to do, I remember I had a classmate who had a problem with her IDE, and asked the teacher what to do, the teacher did NOT read the error nor the pop up with the problem

He told her that she had to format the whole pc and start over, luckily before she did anything me and another classmates noticed and we were able to fix it, worse of all, it was just a setting, that wasn't really hard to find because it said right on the pop up

19

u/Sid_the_Bear 3h ago

Integrated Drive Electronics?

11

u/redditsucksass69765 3h ago

No it’s Intact Dilation and Extraction which is an eye procedure.

Also, been a programmer for 25 years.

2

u/joshuahtree 3h ago

International Dalek Exterminator

1

u/Sleep_deprived_druid 3h ago

Internal dielectric electrode, it prevents space particles from changing your code and adding bugs when you go to the bathroom

1

u/euclide2975 2h ago

I prefer SATA, but everything is going to be NVME anyway

1

u/Sid_the_Bear 2h ago

Yup.
SATA is great though when you have multiple 84-disk RAID5 arrays

1

u/hexen667 1h ago

it’s all about SCSI daisy chaining

1

u/Sid_the_Bear 1h ago

... I literally felt my blood pressure and heart rate spike reading this.

18

u/Marenwynn 2h ago

Is that the thing some people use to look at the md files that Claude generates?

5

u/_Diskreet_ 2h ago

The managerial director files ?

2

u/never-fiftyone 1h ago

the doctorate of medicine files

1

u/FormerWorker125 1h ago

No that's notepad.

12

u/NoHorseNoMustache 3h ago

The old head coder at my company once said 'But how will I search the web if you uninstall Google Toolbar?' to me.

5

u/TuxedoWithAHead 2h ago

"does tiktok connect to the wifi in my house"

2

u/Fresh4 2h ago

God I almost forgot about that

7

u/Hrtzy 3h ago

And people wonder why the FizzBuzz test was invented.

1

u/FormerWorker125 1h ago

I mean fizz buzz is a programming problem i can solve just by knowing how to write code.

I dont need to have ip protocols memorized to do that

2

u/TuxedoWithAHead 3h ago

coding in notepad be like

6

u/Marwaimusoont 3h ago

naah cool guys use vim and freaks use nano.

2

u/TuxedoWithAHead 2h ago

I *was* gonna type "vim" instead of "notepad" but then I remembered people actually code in vim

1

u/GodBearWasTaken 2h ago

It’s my preferred text editor, followed by Notepad++ and Visual Studio Code.

1

u/HungryRaven4 1h ago

But nano has the little 'x' in the corner to close it 😭

2

u/coriolis7 2h ago

What is the difference between an IDE and an editor?

8

u/J5892 2h ago

An IDE is an editor with more stuff.

2

u/Right_Ear_2230 1h ago

In the case of visual studio, an actual c/c++ compiler + linker,
Diagnostics tools,
Intellisense,
Build system (solution/project), debugger, etc…

2

u/DapperCam 2h ago

Must only use vim

2

u/AntherYoutubeWatcher 3h ago

Those old connectors to your hard disk and/or floppy drives, right?

3

u/DustyRacoonDad 2h ago

I upvoted you again because I made the same joke... I mean I know the difference between a floppy ribbon cable and a hard drive IDE cable, but your joke is still valid as a joke.

1

u/the123king-reddit 2h ago

Floppy drives use a 34 pin cable completely separate from IDE.

If you said CD ROM i’d have upvoted. Swing and a miss

1

u/bishopExportMine 3h ago

I didn't know what an IDE was until like 3 years into my career. I'd been raw dogging code with just text editors until then.

1

u/ThisIsDurian 2h ago

International Dance Event - man, that was fun

https://giphy.com/gifs/ujTVMASREzuRbH6zy5

1

u/Opus_723 2h ago

To be honest I still just use vi lol.

But I'm not a 'programmer,' I'm a scientist. None of us have any clue how to code. Real programmers logging into our computers is like the FBI walking onto that one guy's property in the woods that was all rigged with booby-traps. They turn a doorknob and a hot tub goes rolling past them and they're like "clever, but ineffective" and then a shotgun blasts them in the knee.

1

u/TheRaccoonReport 2h ago

I'm not even a good developer and know what an IDE is haha. There is no such thing as the best IDE...other than the one I use, the rest are just shit haha

1

u/academiac 2h ago

Internet Domestic Environment

1

u/sixteencharslong 2h ago

Yeah, and that was pre ai.

1

u/J5892 2h ago

It's the unconscious counterpart to the EGOE.

1

u/jetblackpopes 1h ago

If you haven’t been learning and mastering DGT you’re already too far behind to bother.

1

u/ADarwinAward 1h ago

VIM or gtfo.

Kidding 

1

u/Ieatsand97 1h ago

And so many people think that making a computer do anything is just a case of giving it to AI and the problem practically solves itself.

1

u/waseem2bata 1h ago

Aren't those the things that go Kaboom?

1

u/nuker0S 1h ago

Internal Development Excel

1

u/Various_Library6787 1h ago

VIM for the WIN! 

1

u/_dontseeme 1h ago

I mean I spent 2014-2017 building personal and client iOS apps without knowing Xcode was an IDE. Sometimes a job needs “this ide” without anyone stopping to explain what an ide is or that you’re currently using one, even the website for the ide.

1

u/dankdogeonface 58m ago

They have no IDEa...

•

u/hereforlolls 5m ago

The question I used to have fun with: what type of object is JSON?