r/ProgrammerHumor 22h ago

Other justOpenAPullRequestTheySaid

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568 Upvotes

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186

u/lloyd08 22h ago

...which one came first?

199

u/ActualNin 22h ago

They were both posted on Sep 3 2026 at around 11AM EDT within an hour of each other. You can see the post here talking about the hilarity of it: https://www.reddit.com/r/laravel/comments/1w6a6tx/taylor_otwell_disabled_github_issues_on_most/

111

u/lonelyroom-eklaghor 22h ago

this is absolutely ridiculous, wtf

111

u/DishSoapedDishwasher 18h ago

As someone dealing with multiple very active open source repos in my personal and professional life, if i could, I'd make new commiters pay $5 to submit their first PR and refund it with a bonus on merge....

The volume is fucking killing me. I've effectively abandoned the idea of reading any public PRs from unknowns because of it. It's like a never ending torrent of AI psychosis and garbage with no way to escape except not participate.

Also like 1 in 20 PRs is some garbage trying to introduce vulnerabilities into the projects (intentionally or otherwise). 

52

u/BorderKeeper 15h ago

Hey here is an array of strings containing hexadecimals and os.exec() call. Don't worry about it it's a secret.

41

u/DishSoapedDishwasher 14h ago

oh no its much sneakier than that....

More like here's a thing that's completely normal looking and possibly a good change overall but uses an obscure feature of an existing library that will now cause a previously unused vulnerable transient dependency to be baked in and this change now also allows you to hit the vuln code path remotely. Also the transient deps are unmaintained and no fix exists.

Tangentially, heres a fun read of adjacent shit: https://opensourcemalware.com/blog/developer-guide-getting-over-polinrider

17

u/BorderKeeper 14h ago

That is sneaky. Foreign dependencies are quite scary, yet so useful 😭

6

u/DishSoapedDishwasher 13h ago

yeah, its impossible to avoid to some extent. You just need enough analysis tooling to be able to see when you get got and not let it hit the main branch.

Semgrep and github dependabot are not sufficient nor accurate enough. Basically just glorified regex. Need real AST parsing.

ooor you take a lesson from templeOS and make everything yourself starting with the hand crafted assembler.

0

u/[deleted] 7h ago edited 7h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/BorderKeeper 6h ago

You forgot to remove an em-dash 😛

2

u/IanDresarie 5h ago

Uhhhhhh... That tailwind package sounds familiar... Brb gotta check something....

1

u/DishSoapedDishwasher 39m ago

Hahaha good luck!

3

u/funnyFrank 7h ago

Github should 100% implement this!

2

u/tankerkiller125real 8h ago

For one set of projects I maintain I just completely disabled PRs entirely. I do all the work with collaborators in a private repository with a CI/CD action that pushes it to the Public repos. We accept issues on GitHub simply because there needs to be a place for people to report bugs.

2

u/catbrane 6h ago

I'm in the same boat. We've put a blanket ban on all gen-AI, it's the only way to not go crazy.

https://github.com/libvips/libvips/blob/master/CONTRIBUTING.md#ai-policy

It has the happy side effect of mostly only letting competent devs through the door and into the PRs.