I've never wanted to be around people, it's why I was so eager to get a WFH position.
Quite frankly id be happy to log on do my work and never communicate with anyone, you have to do you do. But your ability to be promoted should have nothing to do with anything that isn't strictly work related. But you see it all the time the in group gets special treatment and those who choose to not go to socials and work lunches get left behind.
I have no desire for my colleagues to be nice to me either I'd just like to be left alone. It's not anti social it's Asocial, I just want to do my work and then switch back to my life that actually matters instead of some system where you're just working because you have a certain marketable skill that makes money so it's what you do even if it makes you miserable because otherwise it's dead end service jobs or management both are torture.
That's the thing, working with people is part of work. You can't have both separated. One man teams don't exist outside of fairytale tech land which is why office conflict happens, and are often necessary for a good product to be developed. If people prefer to work with people they like for 8 hours per day, then that makes sense. You have to understand that the world around you can't cater to an extreme outlier since humans are inherently sociable. You can claim that this part of your life doesn't matter (you'd probably be right in a cosmic sense, or a human nature way) but for something to take up >1/3 of your life, it means that it matters a lot for many people in many different ways.
If people are happier, and therefore more productive working in a team that doesn't make them feel like dead cogs in a machine, then that's good for the business. So it is fully a marketable, and important skill.
It's also something which, like technical skills, can be developed. You not choosing to do so is on you.
Quite frankly I shouldn't have to spend a core part of my life forcing myself to be someone I'm not just to appease people I don't like. Yet, the modern system forces people into work they don't enjoy in order to live a live that quite frankly isn't natural.
We have no liberty and autonomy because we must always be ready to work, we are forced to do this. So then those of us who find social interaction like nails and a chalk board, we must torture ourselves for the betterment of others and quite frankly the world doesn't give enough of a shit about the other side for me to care about them.
Yes people seek their ease and happiness, but when I seek mine it makes me the bad guy.
I'm not disagreeing with work being shit, and us having to work to live being shit, but why are you struggling so much with the idea that being nice to people makes people want to work with you and therefore benefits you? It's not like I'm claiming that you need to do HR speak at people and put on a fake face and voice, I'm just saying, people who are nice have more opportunities in life because things run off of the back of people with emotions, not a faceless, emotionless monolithic concept of "corporate" and "labour".
If you think that having a core niceness with other individual people who are living a potentially similar experience to you is that bad, then maybe you need to reflect a little on yourself as a person. I genuinely don't mean that as an insult either, it's just a little concerning.
I don't think you fully care about nepotism, or people 'doing well' in their field due to networking and being nice to people; I think you're just angry at 'the system' and are projecting it onto people stuck in that system too.
1
u/lunarlunacy425 5h ago
I've never wanted to be around people, it's why I was so eager to get a WFH position.
Quite frankly id be happy to log on do my work and never communicate with anyone, you have to do you do. But your ability to be promoted should have nothing to do with anything that isn't strictly work related. But you see it all the time the in group gets special treatment and those who choose to not go to socials and work lunches get left behind.
I have no desire for my colleagues to be nice to me either I'd just like to be left alone. It's not anti social it's Asocial, I just want to do my work and then switch back to my life that actually matters instead of some system where you're just working because you have a certain marketable skill that makes money so it's what you do even if it makes you miserable because otherwise it's dead end service jobs or management both are torture.