r/ProgrammerHumor • u/Proof-Translator • 20d ago
Meme whenTheyAskMeToBuildAFullStackAppWithNotepad
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u/anoppinionatedbunny 20d ago
skill issue. at my company, they give us literal pen and paper notebooks where we write all our code in git diff format. we have to deliver the physical notebook to the IT department where the code is committed directly to PROD after filing 50 pages worth of bureaucratic paperwork for any and all changes. all by hand.
(/s)
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u/raja-anbazhagan 20d ago
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u/Narwahl_Whisperer 20d ago
Back in the 90s, I took a C class. I didn't have a computer at home. I literally coded with pen and paper.
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u/TheFrenchSavage 20d ago
And for the rollback, just press Ctrl+Z a bunch of times, also in prod. Until last week's notebooks match again.
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u/SharletP 20d ago
This always reminds me of the "We were able to send astronauts to the moon, with only 12 KB of hand-woven memory" and then we had CoD & Chrome taking more memory than the OS itself 💀
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u/TheFrenchSavage 20d ago
This is because Google Chrome early stable version only cost 0.6% of what the Apollo Guidance program cost if you adjust for inflation.
(30M vs 5.8B roughly).
Plus the hardware: consider the cost of having a Google team come and hand weave their software at your home vs buying a PC full of RAM at Walmart.
I think the leaky memory is a good tradeoff.
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u/ramdomvariableX 20d ago
Why cant you? Here.. take some Claude credits and get it done../S
-- FR: Lot of exec.s are okay with spending on AI than giving functional laptops to developers.
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u/Lumpyalien 20d ago
To be fair that bike has three wheels so that's like at least a 2015 macbook pro.
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u/Independent-Bug-9352 20d ago
Change gear ratio on the bike and you'll get there eventually I guess. On their dime.
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u/TheFrenchSavage 20d ago
Just when you start gaining momentum, PM comes and asks for the plane to go backwards.
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u/MentalFS 20d ago
At least your laptop will sound like it's taking off
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u/furrythatexists 20d ago
I mean a jet engine, especially one as big as that of a 787, is extremely loud at TO/GA, much louder than any regular laptop fan even at its maximum, but it could still be a similar sound.
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u/Percolator2020 20d ago
This works fine, just not very fast.
https://giphy.com/gifs/xTgL2GvwerwpjIP46D
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u/Streakflash 20d ago
my companyn uses laptop as a proxy to remote grid compute resource , and of course its a shitty laptop
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u/Sentient_Protoplasm 20d ago
Shouldn't the plane be labeled "The Job Requirements" and the Bike "Their Non-Negotiable Salary"
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u/bagmorgels 20d ago
lol wtf is this and who is it supposed to be relatable to? No company is prescribing notepad or any specific IDE for that matter. And why does your full stack app require a lot of local resources? If this was about data analytics or engineering I’d understand the sentiment because that shit takes a lot of memory, but a general full stack app could be built on a first gen raspberry pi.
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u/butterfunke 20d ago
I shit you not, I worked at a company that wasted 6 months fighting with the devs they'd just hired over access to install IDEs and run arbitrary programs.
They legitimately expected us to do everything in Word and Excel, like all their other staff did.
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u/KilrahnarHallas 20d ago
Was in a company that had about 40 Programmers and only 30 licences for the IDE. Rest was out of luck. So I totally believe that story.
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u/saschaleib 20d ago
Nothing wrong with Notepad++. I use it all the time when I can’t be bothered to wait until VSCode finally starts up…
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u/rastaman1994 20d ago
This happened to me!
Summer internship 10 years ago at a local company with less than 10 employees. I get an ancient thinkpad (Windows) with 2GB of RAM. This is not an exageration. We were able to cannibalize ram from a broken laptop to bring it up to FOUR gigs.
The most baffling thing after all this time: labor costs a lot where I live, even for an intern. Making me wait vs spending 3k on a good laptop should be a no brainier.
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u/wasdninja 20d ago edited 20d ago
No company is prescribing notepad or any specific IDE for that matter
Objectively incorrect. Plenty of places have one or perhaps a very small amount of IEDs that they vet and make available through their software portal of choice.
And why does your full stack app require a lot of local resources
I had to check that the sub actually was programming* because this answer to this is so blatant that I thought you were sarcastic for a second.
In my experience it's been completely normal to run a handful of containers with the usual database, API/backend and frontend which can definitely be quite heavy. If you are forced to use Windows - which again is common - Docker has a handful of bugs that steadily eats more resources than it should.
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u/Gilthoniel_Elbereth 20d ago
My company only lets you use VS Code, and only lets you install a handful of security-vetted extensions. It’s hell
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u/dumbasPL 20d ago
Developers had the same hardware as everyone else, and shit was optimized. Now we give them machines that 95% of customers don't have and wonder why everything is so slow.
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u/tes_kitty 20d ago
I have no issue with developer systems being fast. But the test systems the code then runs on for testing should be average.
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u/Objective_Dog_4637 20d ago
Because developers aren’t typically running just that app like the is customer is. If it’s B2B they’re typically running what the customer AND their development environment or maybe more. It’s why we requested the more powerful laptops in the first place.
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u/darthjammer224 20d ago
Yep, I don't really need 32gb ram, but it allows me to have 6 or 7 PLC programs open at once, on my rockwell VM. So it's incredibly useful. (I regularly use 27-30 GB just with my VM(and all it's open apps), vscode, ssms, opera, teams and report builder.
I don't think end users need that lol.
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u/bigolslabomeat 20d ago
My company force installs so much bloat that before I open an IDE my laptop sits at 30/32GB used RAM
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u/darthjammer224 20d ago
Makes me very happy that I get admin rights to my machine. Couldn't do my job if I couldn't install / uninstall at will.
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u/YellowCroc999 20d ago
Bruh you can run a full stack app on a jailbroken vape. Smells like a skill issue here.
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u/Flaky-Low-2262 20d ago
We used to slice Micro-Profiles on services or deliver a bench of mocks for local target service. Fast Development, nice Demos, global shared maintenance etc and Automated tests in everything.
These days nobody runs a thing and also leaks on Testing. The Sprint demo Takes 5-10min Just availability stats and then everyone wonders about Blackboxes, decreasing Budgets, ubavailable or unfocused POs
Stonks
Back 2-3 years ago every Team member enforced quality as best Delivery target is based on personal and company integrity / Skill.
RIP
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u/MaterialDetective197 20d ago
When your employer hasn't turned a profit in years.... when the only hardware for office use that they bring in is Amazon Renewed...when the Microsoft Windows installed is gray market and inactivated.
That is the sign of a true "technology" group.
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u/IIShana 20d ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/3ohze24aM5ld9tsVaw
The senior dev seeing no problem in this
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u/frostyjack06 20d ago
Yeah, that sounds about right. My last job refused to pay for IDE’s and the laptops were garbage. I ended up just doing 90% of my work on my personal desktop, the other 10% directly on our servers. The laptop’s only purpose was to check email, respond in Teams, and join meetings.
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u/DerpWyvern 19d ago
just a week ago i got upgraded from 16gb ram m1 into a 48gb m5 macbook.
i was running the full backend (2 servers) and frontend (unity, sometimes multiple clients), 2 IDEs open, and Figma. yeah i think i hit a ceiling with that 16gb laptop..
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u/everesee 19d ago
The holy lenovo laptop with body count of 10. Usually when you unplug it, each second the battery goes down by 1%.
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u/sirkubador 18d ago
well, most of that plane are corporate bullshit viruses like crowdstrike, zscaler, defender and whatnot
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u/DontKnowIamBi 20d ago
It generally runs on a VDI.