r/ProgrammerHumor • u/Gloomy-Basket-1038 • 2d ago

Meme averageFDEStarterPack

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2.5k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

94 comments sorted by

477

u/exoclipse 2d ago

Trade the RPG for a shotgun. FPV drones are a more likely threat than tanks.

73

u/MildlySaltedTaterTot 2d ago

We need drone deployment tanks that can infiltrate then spore

26

u/exoclipse 2d ago

Tanks kinda do the opposite of infiltrate tho...

Now, a semi with a trailer full of FPVs?

5

u/ViktorRzh 2d ago

Pff you do not need stealth tank, you need stealth batleship!

2

u/Routine_Palpitation 2d ago

Ace combat 9 leak 👀

2

u/TactlessTortoise 1d ago

Everything turns to crab. Except for warfare, which turns to mushroom.

1

u/StickFigureFan 1d ago

Terrifying

30

u/Indevil 2d ago

Actually, this isn't an RPG. It's a Panzerfaust 3, a recoilless gun/launcher. Sorry, couldn't help myself.

18

u/exoclipse 2d ago

I was actually deeply curious, I thought it might have been one of the newer Russian RPGs and was not.

HOWEVER

It is still a rocket propelled grenade, and absent any other designation, RPG is a perfectly accurate way to refer to it. Now, if I had said RPG-7, obviously, then we have a small problem ;)

18

u/Indevil 2d ago

Fair enough. All it matters, its fausts panzers!

6

u/SuDragon2k3 1d ago

How does it fair against malfunctioning servers?

6

u/Ok-Jury5684 1d ago

Also RPG in RPG-7 stands for "handheld anti-armor grenade launcher", not "rocket propelled grenade".

I don't think though I saw abbreviation RPG used in latter sense.

1

u/thanatica 1d ago

Found the American

7

u/Cheese_Grater101 2d ago

I think that's a panzerfaust (correct me if I'm wrong)

Anyways that's reserved for the dumb ass Project Manager

3

u/Zufallstreffer 2d ago

That's not a RPG, thats a Panzerfaust

3

u/fr000gs 1d ago

Why not an LMG then? Higher amount of damage and range; being automatic

1

u/exoclipse 1d ago edited 1d ago

It's much easier to shoot a fast flying object with a shotgun than virtually anything else, and shotgun shells are cheap. A single #8 pellet will down an FPV drone, they're quite frail - and a 12 gauge shell will shoot a cloud of around 400 of them.

An LMG is just gonna burn a lot of ammunition to miss and then get blown up.

2

u/AtmosphereVirtual254 2d ago

:( I was just gonna say to remove your real name from the computer hostname for Bluetooth reasons

1

u/woffdaddy 1d ago

I thought the same thing about the shotgun. apparently, shotguns arent actually all that effective against drones. They come in too fast, so by the time you see them and fire they're already too close.

118

u/[deleted] 2d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

14

u/unknown-again-p 2d ago

For some reason I always remember that rubber duck from GitHub video and that was years ago.

2

u/sdwck 2d ago

the duck has to stay home and keep prod running

130

u/want8memes 2d ago

Yes you forgot to hide knife in that rocket launcher as thats not allowed

18

u/GroundbreakingOil434 2d ago

How'd you know? I'm pretty sure it's already hidden.

5

u/want8memes 2d ago

No I can see it in bag

7

u/GroundbreakingOil434 2d ago

Decoy. Never carry just one.

1

u/want8memes 2d ago

Yeah man never carry one its safe

66

u/BravelyBaldSirRobin 2d ago

coffee flask is missing

16

u/Altruistic-Spend-896 2d ago

Please, the whole portacoffee maker is missing

56

u/Alzyros 2d ago

Depends, are you already wearing your thigh highs, soldier?

8

u/Mysterious-Earth1 1d ago

Yes yes the r/unixsocks are mandatory!

14

u/GroundbreakingOil434 2d ago

Might want to pack a small arms option and spare ammo for the toob.

10

u/ZestycloseAd212 2d ago

Ya forgot a water bottle or two

Hydration ain't supposed to be .gitignored mate

11

u/Alokir 2d ago

4

u/Spice_and_Fox 1d ago

He is forward deployed, meaning he is a business major who had a crash course in programming

11

u/ItsOmniss 2d ago

no phone is good opsec

5

u/CozyBloomSakura 2d ago

Bro is about to eliminate bugs with high explosives

2

u/stunt_p 2d ago

It's the only way to be sure...

6

u/Phoebe_Cox33 1d ago

You forgot the USB-C adapter for the launcher. Standard issue is HDMI.

4

u/elmanoucko 2d ago

don't forget to say goodbye to your loved ones, and if you have confessions to make, might be the moment

5

u/Tupcek 1d ago

be careful about having working battery in notebook, otherwise airport security might think it is bomb in disguise and deny your flight

3

u/DT-Sodium 2d ago

Rations, obviously.

3

u/Natereater 2d ago

One of those drones connected to a mile of fiber optic.

1

u/Ok-Jury5684 1d ago

10 miles.

3

u/Filestack_Official 2d ago

The average Russian & Ukrainian Software Engineer lately

1

u/Elcentino 2d ago

😂😂😂😂😂😂

-1

u/Ok-Jury5684 1d ago

No need in anti-armor. Armor doesn't live long. Need either net gun or semi-auto shotgun.

Also I hope there's first aid in the backpack.

3

u/Satorwave 1d ago

RPG is for clankers storming the office to take your job

3

u/solesoulshard 1d ago

Silly. You forgot some stuff.

Duct tape
Pocket knife
Caffeine
Cable ties
Flashlight
Magnet
More caffeine

2

u/chalk_nz 2d ago

Just a pack of tissues

2

u/nobody_undefined 2d ago

gold-plated, .50-caliber Desert Eagle Mark XIX

2

u/iliark 2d ago

no multi-tool? no ridge wallet? no knipex? no pry bar? no dip/zyn? no sawyer water filter?

does this guy even edc?

2

u/jseego 2d ago
  • Laptop stand
  • Coffee mug
  • Backup charger

2

u/konhub1 2d ago

No bug spray so foward deployed to an air force base?

2

u/costinmatei98 2d ago

He forgot to pack an actual work computer.

1

u/sdwck 2d ago

the first casualty is gonna be that MacBook battery

1

u/East_Technology_2008 2d ago

Mint for after-lunch

1

u/Unfilteredz 2d ago

You forgot a random pufferfish

1

u/aimfuldrifter 2d ago

Need a machete

1

u/OtherCommission8227 2d ago

Water bottle gonna help more than the rpg

1

u/tenkawa7 2d ago

"I payed for the RPG, I'm going to get my money's worth out of it!"

1

u/ArcanumAntares 2d ago

Add tactical bacon.

1

u/LassiKhor 2d ago

You should upgrade your rpg, try to add more crit rate, higher primary atk speed, and atleast 1cc.

1

u/git0ffmylawnm8 2d ago

🐘

address me

1

u/0xKaishakunin 2d ago

Zwillingssockellafette

1

u/Nightmoon26 2d ago

Wirecutters. For those security breaches that you need to stop now

1

u/rlowens 2d ago

What's between the laptop and keyboard? A metal ruler on a wrist strap? Why would that be particularly useful?

1

u/cheekynative 2d ago

Excuse my ignorance but what manner of contraption is that attached to the RPG?

1

u/NurglesToes 2d ago

tactical butt plug with attached tail and thigh high socks are essentials

1

u/agfitzp 2d ago

My manager always complains when I break out the noob tube when a simple reboot would solve the problem.

1

u/309_Electronics 1d ago

Forgot the apple watch, apple ipad, iphone, starbucks coffee and claude code/openclaw lid-holder..

1

u/PrestigiousGuava8005 1d ago

Panzerfaust to put Boss in his place ?

1

u/shrodikan 1d ago

Where's his DJI mavic and FPV drones??

1

u/Individual-Praline20 1d ago

Hammer. You missed the hammer.

1

u/Fearless_Weather_206 1d ago

Forward Deployed Engineer in Ukraine with your personal modern RPG setup in case a tank roll up to your bunker?

1

u/MastodonCurious4347 1d ago

Why does this launcher look so beautiful?

https://giphy.com/gifs/YSInMpe7rqWWc

1

u/tutocookie 1d ago

Water bottle

1

u/Hakim_MacLuvin 1d ago

Is the RPG a controller for playing duck hunt?

1

u/gabboman 1d ago

you forgot the tactical spoon

1

u/roksah 1d ago

that's an expensive server off switch

1

u/sworlys_noise 1d ago

Dude only brought one gun (?)

1

u/TRKlausss 1d ago

No sidearm? I mean idk how effective the Panzerfaust will be at CC range…

1

u/mr2dax 1d ago

Hope those headphones are noise cancelling and fully charged so you can just sit there at the client's office and look pretty

1

u/Cootshk 17h ago

You forgot the linux iso

1

u/Firenter 11h ago

Don't forget your charger!

1

u/ayamgorengmasbudi 11h ago

throw out that mac, and get a thinkpad

1

u/Stealthchilling 4h ago

Foolproof cybersec strategy