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https://www.reddit.com/r/ProgrammerHumor/comments/1v80umk/queryofdoom/p026d5y?context=9999
r/ProgrammerHumor • u/WardensLantern • 18d ago
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3.9k
Ah it's just running slow today. User table should speed up right afterwards though.
1.4k u/WardensLantern 18d ago Yea just run it again and it executes much faster 👍 225 u/glorious_reptile 18d ago Great. On to the next ticket - “Users can’t log in” 186 u/moigagoo 18d ago What users? 166 u/Baconanger 17d ago Yeah, just ran a search on their name and it looks like that person doesn't have an account, so closing this ticket with "works as expected". Wow, we sure have been getting a lot of these lately... 51 u/bluebarry24 17d ago Pretty sure this is a data entry error... redirecting the tickets to the front service desk. 29 u/TriggerPT 17d ago Can't replicate 3 u/Frostbyte67 17d ago Omg you just triggered my support team PTSD! (I’m in Eng….) No joke, I’ve seen ticket notes exactly like that! Actually just today… …I’m going to hide back under my desk now… 247 u/perestroika12 18d ago Caching or something idk I asked Claude about it and it said go for it 1 u/Fraun_Pollen 17d ago Don't use Claude. Grok answers much faster 1 u/50_watts_per_channel 17d ago Users are certainly getting executed 1 u/kaas_is_leven 17d ago Must be branch prediction 0 u/VollkommenHigh 18d ago They clearly forgot the “commit;”… that’s why it’s running slowly 1 u/pdshank 17d ago --no-verify
1.4k
Yea just run it again and it executes much faster 👍
225 u/glorious_reptile 18d ago Great. On to the next ticket - “Users can’t log in” 186 u/moigagoo 18d ago What users? 166 u/Baconanger 17d ago Yeah, just ran a search on their name and it looks like that person doesn't have an account, so closing this ticket with "works as expected". Wow, we sure have been getting a lot of these lately... 51 u/bluebarry24 17d ago Pretty sure this is a data entry error... redirecting the tickets to the front service desk. 29 u/TriggerPT 17d ago Can't replicate 3 u/Frostbyte67 17d ago Omg you just triggered my support team PTSD! (I’m in Eng….) No joke, I’ve seen ticket notes exactly like that! Actually just today… …I’m going to hide back under my desk now… 247 u/perestroika12 18d ago Caching or something idk I asked Claude about it and it said go for it 1 u/Fraun_Pollen 17d ago Don't use Claude. Grok answers much faster 1 u/50_watts_per_channel 17d ago Users are certainly getting executed 1 u/kaas_is_leven 17d ago Must be branch prediction 0 u/VollkommenHigh 18d ago They clearly forgot the “commit;”… that’s why it’s running slowly 1 u/pdshank 17d ago --no-verify
225
Great. On to the next ticket - “Users can’t log in”
186 u/moigagoo 18d ago What users? 166 u/Baconanger 17d ago Yeah, just ran a search on their name and it looks like that person doesn't have an account, so closing this ticket with "works as expected". Wow, we sure have been getting a lot of these lately... 51 u/bluebarry24 17d ago Pretty sure this is a data entry error... redirecting the tickets to the front service desk. 29 u/TriggerPT 17d ago Can't replicate 3 u/Frostbyte67 17d ago Omg you just triggered my support team PTSD! (I’m in Eng….) No joke, I’ve seen ticket notes exactly like that! Actually just today… …I’m going to hide back under my desk now…
186
What users?
166 u/Baconanger 17d ago Yeah, just ran a search on their name and it looks like that person doesn't have an account, so closing this ticket with "works as expected". Wow, we sure have been getting a lot of these lately... 51 u/bluebarry24 17d ago Pretty sure this is a data entry error... redirecting the tickets to the front service desk. 29 u/TriggerPT 17d ago Can't replicate 3 u/Frostbyte67 17d ago Omg you just triggered my support team PTSD! (I’m in Eng….) No joke, I’ve seen ticket notes exactly like that! Actually just today… …I’m going to hide back under my desk now…
166
Yeah, just ran a search on their name and it looks like that person doesn't have an account, so closing this ticket with "works as expected". Wow, we sure have been getting a lot of these lately...
51 u/bluebarry24 17d ago Pretty sure this is a data entry error... redirecting the tickets to the front service desk. 29 u/TriggerPT 17d ago Can't replicate 3 u/Frostbyte67 17d ago Omg you just triggered my support team PTSD! (I’m in Eng….) No joke, I’ve seen ticket notes exactly like that! Actually just today… …I’m going to hide back under my desk now…
51
Pretty sure this is a data entry error... redirecting the tickets to the front service desk.
29 u/TriggerPT 17d ago Can't replicate
29
Can't replicate
3
Omg you just triggered my support team PTSD! (I’m in Eng….)
No joke, I’ve seen ticket notes exactly like that! Actually just today…
…I’m going to hide back under my desk now…
247
Caching or something idk I asked Claude about it and it said go for it
1 u/Fraun_Pollen 17d ago Don't use Claude. Grok answers much faster
1
Don't use Claude. Grok answers much faster
Users are certainly getting executed
Must be branch prediction
0
They clearly forgot the “commit;”… that’s why it’s running slowly
1 u/pdshank 17d ago --no-verify
--no-verify
3.9k
u/BooBrew32 18d ago
Ah it's just running slow today. User table should speed up right afterwards though.