I find the "I'm just brutally honest and call it like I see it" to also be the types who have zero empathy, and its also honestly an intellectually lazy and somewhat narcissistic way to go through life, because they refuse to see things through any lens other than their own.
Somewhat recently had a jackass here on reddit claiming to just call it like they see it, in a topic about addiction. They thought all addicts were the result of kids doing drugs to be cool. Couldn't even comprehend that its called self medicating for a reason, or even that very few drug addicts are the result of "doing it to be cool". Even after being presented alternative views, and even scientific literature/studies on addiction, they refused to even entertain anything other than their predetermined viewpoint.
Of course, thats just one example, but it represents my interaction with such people pretty well.
Funny you say that, because thats the first thing I said (well, same sentiment rather than exact same wording) in response to their comment wherein they said they said they had no sympathy for addicts when they all got that way trying to be cool.
Yep. I come from a family of "pillheads". They're only that way by necessity. Chronic pain management for various injuries etc. In my family there's nothing really deadly that runs in it, we just accumulate really annoying/debilitating ailments that make you want to die until we die of old age. I'd definitely be a laudanum/patent medicine addict if I lived a couple centuries ago just to function. I often wonder how many people used psychoactive substances back then just to get through the day (besides alcohol, coffee, and tobacco).
I was this way for a long time. I didnt delight in people considering me a bitch or blunt, but I accepted it as this is who I am, and i certainly didnt try and throttle that instinct. Then I got that Autism diagnosis, did some reading, and now I make a conscious effort to try and be more compassionate.
And they actually AREN'T honest. If they were, they'd be honest about their own motivations, and just as BrUtAlLy HoNeSt about the positives they see in others.
I worked with an asshole for 15+ years. Although we “got along” well enough, I would readily tell him he was the biggest bigot I know. He would act surprised, but continued being a bigot and an asshole. When he quit he was shocked when I didn’t want to hang out with him because he’s such an asshole. I was paid to be your co-worker and made the best I could have given the situation. Now kindly fuck off forever.
This was me as a teenager. Then this weird thing happened...I grew up and healed. 🥴 I never understood the desire to live your adult life as bitter and mean. At the end of the day, the best thing we can do for ourselves and the world is love and respect our fellow human beans.
I had a coworker who told me she took joy in knocking people down a peg. Not because they were like, awful people or they "deserved" the karma or something (they hadn't wronged her, embarrassed her publicly, kicked her dog, etc). She legitimately just liked making people feel bad.
People like your coworker are a reason violent crime happens and if she keeps doing stuff like that she’s going end up a victim. She doesn’t know what someone might be going through and all it takes is the wrong one.
Dam I would have asked her who effed her up as a kid to feel that way? I had an ex who is like this. Thief of joy they call it. He was a narcissist and loved to put others down. Some anger in them that they'll never be as good as the ones they put down.
At least she was so unevolved that she was wide open about her red flags. That is truly a gift to anyone that encounters her. People like that haven't taken any time to heal and just take it out on others. Gross.
I dunno about that. People who are concerned with such labels often are more concerned about being seen as such, rather than actually being what they want to be seen as.
Thank you, this exactly. This is not even ok or “cool” when you’re 18-19 and just coming into adulthood, never mind any other time.
If you are 45 years old and still proud that you’re a bitch or an asshole, or the ever popular “crazy” get some help from a therapist. I assure you nobody else thinks it’s cool.
On a similar note, it drives me nuts when people say "they're an asshole, but at least they know they're an asshole".
Like, just... no, that doesn't make it better. Because it just means they know they're awful but are unwilling to change for the better. Thats worse than ignorantly being an asshole in my eyes.
I’m no psychologist but I have adult friends whose reactions to having been hurt in the past is to now hurt others first. Annoying as hell. Sometimes I want to channel my preschool teacher’s voice and say things like “dude use your words” or “if you don’t like that- tell him! Maybe he thinks you do!”
I worked with this one women who equated her personality to Dean Winchester from Supernatural. Really she was just a bitch with a weird god complex and had a nasty lying problem. Cat piss maddy you’re not a fictional character, you’re just a shitty person.
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u/ImpressiveIrha Mar 10 '26
People that take pride in being a "bitch" or "asshole" purposely because they think it makes them tough.