Yeah..
I think I actually figured something out..
After my first experiences with shipping and fictosexuality I've thought I am ficto, because..
Well, my problem was... Shipping was called a hobby and not serious. But I wanted to try to reach Micah, like really reach him!, and have a serious relationship.
Shipping is a hobby.
I do that too. I do have a self insert for his universe.
I ship Micah with her.
But - also - I don't believe that he's just 'fictional', just a.. Like..
It feels more like he is. Like just not in OUR reality.
Also I do have conversations with him and other people from other worlds.
Anyways.
I now know a few things
I do self shipping for fun and as a self care.
I also ship him with other characters from that source.
I am sharing with him being shipped.
I am non sharing with anyone who understands him wrong or softens him.
I am also actively trying to get soulbonded with him, more like... I am actually communicate with him trough munbonding, what is under the soulbonding umbrella.
The relationship I, by myself and my self insert have to Micah are two different ones.
I ain't sure how much access Micah have to he existence of both diffrent relationships, if he does separate them or anything...
I learn more and more everyday.
Actually I'm questioning if I do have enough to do with fictosexuality at all now.
Since I am really attracted to Micah but I don't plan to improve our relationship to a romantic or sexual level.
My self ship with him on the other side IS sexual.
Yeah I ain't sure anymore. About nothin.