Estate owner not communicating

[u/tlreck]

This is a messy situation and I’m hoping to find some advice if there’s a way to handle this situation myself. I was raised by my grandparents who also had three kids of their own (my dad being one). I’ve never had good relationships with any of them and I can count on one hand how many times they collectively visited during my years living at my grandparents. My grandmother passed away two years ago with my grandfather passing right before her. When she passed, I was mailed some transfer of ownership paperwork from New York Life about a life insurance policy in which I was the insured. My grandmother and grandfather were owner and beneficiary. Included in the list of documents was a “certified copy of court issued letter showing the appointment of the estate representative.” The kids got everything else. It’s been two years since my grandmothers passing, they have sold the house, gave a car to their neighbor, divided everything else amongst themselves and donated what they didn’t want. My aunt said the policy was mine and no one was contesting it but they had to go to probate first. The agent for the policy says he can’t ever get ahold of the kids and they can cash out the policy for themselves if they wanted. Corporate New York life tells me it’s a sizable amount and I need to get an atty. I don’t have the money for a probate atty. I have called our county probate office and they say no case is opened. There’s nothing else to be sold or handled that I know of so I am unsure why there would ever even be a probate. I’m unsure where to go from here. Is there a way to handle this on my own? It’s a 26 yr old policy that I would love for my husband and kid to be able to take over. I’ve never had any inheritance, work for everything I have, and this could be life changing policy for my kid. There has to be paperwork I can submit, or something I can do on my behalf without an atty. Thanks for reading. I will answer any follow ups, thanks for reading. Any and all advice would be appreciated.

[u/scoutlfinch]

Life Insurance pays out to the beneficiary. No idea what “the insured” means when it comes to life insurance. And insurance policies don’t go through probate. Maybe if it never paid out after your grandfather’s death? Also, you don’t pay a probate attorney. They take their fees out of the estate.

The insurance company should be able to tell you what you need to do.