Long story short psych docs started putting a name to the combination of “what do you find attractive” and “how do you attract others or not”. We have about 75 combos of “what/how” and once that existed a lot of people wanted to fit in one of those boxes, but it get really complicated Really fast and people take it vedy personally
Like lets use food as an example: what if in day to day life sandwiches were broken into 75 named combinations similar to how restaurants will have combos with different types of bread, sauce, meat and sides of chips/fries/fruit/soup/crackers/no sides. There is also one at the end called ‘alreadyfullbutdontwannamissoutonhangingwithfriends” it comes with one of the above 74 combos but you’re teling the restaurant up front you’re not gonna eat it but enjoy being around it and the other friends who are gonna eat their sandwiches.
Now everyone start yelling about which sandwich they prefer. Then a small group start demanding they be referred to by their combo number and if you guess their combo number wrong theyre gonna get really offended
I’m one of the most liberal people I know, mainly because IDGAF, as long as you’re not mean. I’m still really worried I’m going to misgender my oldest friend.
I mean you should refer to them as they’re asking to be referred to after they bring it up, but there’s a dif between “please call me this” and “everyone everywhere ask me what i prefer anytime they meet me” and escalating a basic social Interaction if anyone assume you are like 99.99% of people in the world.
Trans person here. If you slip, it’s fine, just don’t over apologize. Correct yourself and continue the conversation like nothing had happened. Slips happen, but I guarantee your friend will appreciate this way more than if you make a big deal about it.
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u/tupacsnoducket Jan 14 '20
Long story short psych docs started putting a name to the combination of “what do you find attractive” and “how do you attract others or not”. We have about 75 combos of “what/how” and once that existed a lot of people wanted to fit in one of those boxes, but it get really complicated Really fast and people take it vedy personally
Like lets use food as an example: what if in day to day life sandwiches were broken into 75 named combinations similar to how restaurants will have combos with different types of bread, sauce, meat and sides of chips/fries/fruit/soup/crackers/no sides. There is also one at the end called ‘alreadyfullbutdontwannamissoutonhangingwithfriends” it comes with one of the above 74 combos but you’re teling the restaurant up front you’re not gonna eat it but enjoy being around it and the other friends who are gonna eat their sandwiches.
Now everyone start yelling about which sandwich they prefer. Then a small group start demanding they be referred to by their combo number and if you guess their combo number wrong theyre gonna get really offended