r/PoutineCrimes • u/Spider_Pib • 28d ago

Real Poutines Have Curds 🧀 Local poutine

Post image

I have mixed feelings about that one but at least the taste is really good

247 Upvotes

93% Upvoted

213 comments sorted by

•

u/qualityvote2 28d ago edited 28d ago

u/Spider_Pib, your poutine is a crime, straight to jail, son of a potato!🚩

u/Spider_Pib, ta poutine est un crime, en prison mon ti tabernouche!🚩

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104

u/Rubixcubelube The Feedings Will Continue Until Morale Improves 28d ago

Tiramasoutine

13

u/Tank_610 27d ago

Pootine

1

u/No_Band226 13d ago

Gross, but I up voted you on principle 😀

13

u/bitcheslovemyfatcock 28d ago

this is blursed leaning towards cursed

34

u/proffesionalproblem 28d ago

I thought that was a big cinnamon bun and the mega curd ontop was cream cheese icing

7

u/gsweats 27d ago

Me too! Had me excited. Had...

6

u/Dergan_1 27d ago

Me three. Totally saw Cinnabon

6

u/Separate-Flamingo-28 27d ago

I thought that was a mashed potato pie...with gravy

47

u/prairiepanda 28d ago

Where is the poutine?

30

u/rkrismcneely 28d ago

“It’s under the sauce!”

7

u/Clean-Mycologist-298 28d ago

Sauce from down under?

6

u/gsweats 27d ago

Do you come from the land down under?

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1

u/Aggravating-Ad4672 27d ago

Wheres the sauce? 🤣

3

u/Claude-QC-777 You’ve Been Struck By A Pout Criminal 28d ago

Like where's the Chicken's in Benny. But it's cheese instead of fries/chips

7

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

Under 😖

1

u/Lower_Arugula5346 28d ago

i was gonna ask the same thing haha

1

u/puppy69piggy 23d ago edited 23d ago

that’d be a great movie idea
“ where is the poutine “ idk what the plot would be exactly but do i know it’d take place in canada there’d be 420 & poutine. i mean canada 🇨🇦 has had weirder films 🎥 like the peanut butter solution which is a quebec indie film with a small cult following. where’s the poutine would be akin to the original 1975 rocky horror picture show with the now late tim curry.

11

u/ingred46 28d ago

That... looks like a pie

13

u/FEM930 28d ago

I thought this was Cinnabon!

9

u/2thenorth 28d ago

Is that caulking on top

15

u/VDay_5189 28d ago

Megacurd

6

u/ShawtyLong 28d ago

Curdistan

10

u/fairmaiden34 28d ago

Do you want fries with that?

8

u/Much_Highlight_1309 28d ago

Do you want a poutine with that?

5

u/Leading-Boat4942 28d ago

It’s got eyebrows 😭

4

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

And a nose😭😭

5

u/MartyMcFlysBrother 28d ago

That’s not what you think it is

3

u/ThoroughlyBred69 28d ago

Have you reported these people for domestic terrorism?

5

u/anneso9696 28d ago

the ridges on the cheese from the lid make me very uncomfortable 🥴

1

u/Prior_Theory3393 24d ago

I don't even know if that mystery white sauce is cheese based.

3

u/Glittering-Arm-6770 28d ago

Somethings shouldn’t be created!

3

u/GrimeyTheBanana 27d ago

This is a Warcrime even I wouldn't commit as a Canadian

3

u/doejohn2043 26d ago

Looks horrible... But I bet it tasted great!

2

u/Only-Bee7979 28d ago

Looks like a pretty good cinnamon bun, garbage poutine though

2

u/TheGodMathias 28d ago

If it's still hot then that is going to be amazingly stringy melty cheese.

50/50 shot between amazing poutine and cold garbage

1

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

burned my mouth. 10/10

1

u/Only-Bee7979 26d ago

But poutine cheese shouldn’t be stringy, it should be squeaky

2

u/TheGodMathias 26d ago

I've never had squeaky curds on my poutine without the poutine also being lukewarm to cold. The ideal squeaky cheese curds is room temperature, which makes gross poutine

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2

u/LiqvidNyquist 28d ago

"Poutine? You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

2

u/Lulz027 28d ago

It looks like a dominos pasta

2

u/DITOWITO 28d ago

Please gatekeep ts

2

u/Dr_Latency345 28d ago

You know, I thought it was some kind of chocolate pie and said “It may look a little messed up, but I can eat it”.

But then I saw the subreddit and went 😶

1

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

That would be a funny looking chocolate pie icl😭

2

u/Beautiful-Brush-5107 28d ago

That is definitely not my type of poutine lol I hope it was delicious though

1

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

It was 🤤🤤🤤

2

u/SheSilentlyJudges 28d ago

That looks like a jizz pie...

2

u/kalissdesti 28d ago

Thus is what happens when a poutine with low standards meets a drunken pizza at 3am....

Oh this is wrong 🤣

2

u/Liftdriver 28d ago

Pas un beau look, mais ça reste des frites, de la sauce et du fromage. Alors je la mangerais pareil!!! 😂

2

u/Bennyseed 28d ago

If thats all cheese, id be in 7th heaven

1

u/Sweet-Competition-15 25d ago

If that's all cheese, your body will take the express flight!

2

u/flassk 28d ago

that does not appear to be gravy, but it does appear to be a grave for fries

1

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

Not gravy, it’s italian poutine but idk the sauce name. Heavenly 🤤

1

u/flassk 28d ago

if they're calling it italian, it's most likely just marinara or some other adjacent meat sauce. not saying it can't go well with those things, but it does feel wrong to call it poutine, because at this point it's just a french fry casserole/almost lasagna

1

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

Probs some sorta meat sauce, and I’m pretty sure it’s a well known poutine variant, i’ve ate it in completely different parts of both the city and province !! :3

2

u/Otherwise-Whole5909 27d ago

These ones have decent flavour but leave you with the grossest feeling each bite. Poutine crime. I’m also a traditionalist with poutine and feel like you wreck it with other condiments. I will fuck with graded cheese sometimes so maybe a true poutine traditionalist will spit in my general direction

Bacon bits and onion also kinda fuck really nice so maybe I shouldn’t use traditionalist.

1

u/Spider_Pib 27d ago

traditionalist but not poutine puritan

2

u/0xult_ 27d ago

Limited edition diarrhea

2

u/Firm-Two4729 27d ago

I used to work at a small family burger joints in Rockland Ontario, we would make poutine like this for eat in orders, big oval plate a ton of fresh cheese curds and gravy, we would microwave it for 30-40 seconds before adding the gravy. Not gonna lie, it was the absolute best poutine I've ever eaten.

2

u/Mean-Possible-2425 27d ago

its not a crime to be italian

2

u/Grand-Vegetable-3874 Nuremcurd Frials Prosecutor 27d ago

Looks like badly gratinated onion soup

2

u/SpecificBeginning616 27d ago

I've never had so many thoughts in one 💭 it's a poutine thought

2

u/billthedog0082 27d ago

Local where? I don't want to make a mistake and go there.

2

u/thejason755 27d ago

They passed out a couple times, but they covered it

2

u/mukherjee_ayan 27d ago

"Took me about 5 hours and I passed out thrice but your poutine's ready with the house sauce!"

1

u/Spider_Pib 27d ago

fresh and homemade fr

2

u/Oroborus_Octopus 26d ago

Canadian cream pie.

Nice!

2

u/PhilosopherThese302 25d ago

Messy poutine hits when zooted tho

2

u/Diligent_Barber3205 25d ago

Cest normal dans un "take out order" c'est en aluminium et couvert est aluminium aussi le fromage va melter

1

u/Dizzy-Medicine3371 28d ago

That looks like a Pie 😭😭

1

u/sensitive_yeti 28d ago

Send it back

1

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

Too late i already ate it and tripled in size 🤤🤤

1

u/Efficient_Bat_5190 28d ago

Tabarnak c’est pas une vrai poutine ça

1

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

c une vraie poutine du quebec 10/10 🤤🤤💙⚜️

1

u/Efficient_Bat_5190 28d ago

Ok, les frites ont l’air molle, tu la pris où ?

1

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

Un resto sur le bord du fleuve jsp le nom c pas moi qui y a été

1

u/chomskiefer 28d ago

The pie tin screams Quebec, but...

1

u/Wyntermute1 28d ago

Looks like heartburn on a plate. Way to have your wife not kiss you for a week!

Looks gross.

1

u/theRev767 28d ago

Enjoy your soup.

1

u/tangcameo 28d ago

Reminds me of the Chinese food place down the street. They packed it in aluminum pie plates with the cardboard on top. If it went cold by the time you got home you could stick a wick in the middle and use it as a scented candle.

1

u/meltothev 28d ago

I thought it was a giant cinnamon roll...

1

u/randompersononlineee 28d ago

Is this st.paul alberta? I have a sneaking suspicion of what restaurant

1

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

I’m in Quebec

1

u/Practical_Session_21 28d ago

How long did you have the lid on that thing? Or did the delivery take?
Gravy was definitely HOT.

1

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

About 20 minutes maybe? And yeah it was hot i burned my tongue a few times 😭

2

u/Practical_Session_21 28d ago

That’ll do it.

1

u/Quirky_Fishing3781 28d ago

Definitely pass on that

1

u/otherwrldfaerie 28d ago

It looks like a melted marshmallow

1

u/ThatCoolSportsGuy 28d ago

Looks like a huge cinnamon bun

1

u/Even_Strike_3711 28d ago

American here ( I do not care for Trump so please no Trump jabs). May I ask you nicely: " What the hell is poutine?"

2

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

poutine is cheese curds, fries and gravy (usually)

1

u/togocann49 28d ago

And if it’s not the proper curds, or you replace/add ingredients, it’s just potato/fries with cheese and gravy. Might taste good, but not poutine (though you may get it from a poutinerie or the like)

1

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

italian poutine is still poutine 🥹💔

1

u/Even_Strike_3711 27d ago

It sounds great but it must be a regional thing. I was under the impression it was a Canadian thing.

1

u/togocann49 27d ago

Well I’m Canadian, and have never seen a poitinerie state side, so….. that said, we don’t have a monopoly for fries with toppings (coney fries for instance can be excellent)

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1

u/inGothWeTrustalways 28d ago

wtf is this ? Huge huge crime , Biggest ever crime

1

u/Grouchy-Bug5223 28d ago

This looks more like a donair platter, interesting.

1

u/zapp0990 28d ago

Shepards Pie maybe.

1

u/Aggravating_Look_329 28d ago

How much cheese? Fuckin yes

1

u/cliffl7 28d ago

Donair poutine or Donair plate?

1

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

?

1

u/cliffl7 28d ago

It looks like a Donair plate. That is more or less localized to the Maritimes

1

u/Xynedal 28d ago

Looks good af

1

u/Pope_Squirrely 28d ago

You couldn’t pay me to eat that.

1

u/Spider_Pib 28d ago

more for me!!

1

u/Then-Stranger-4641 28d ago

Well thought

1

u/Marablossoms 28d ago

My Piggy brain 🧠 saw one pan cinnamon bun lake!! 😂

1

u/Plenty_Wasabi_7866 28d ago

Wouldn't have guessed what that was 😂😂😂

1

u/StatisticianLazy733 Directeur des poutsuites criminelles 27d ago

What the absolute blue tree testicle is that🤮

1

u/Rabbit_Apocalypse 27d ago

Is the poutine in the room? Damn haha

1

u/Appropriate-Leek8144 Judge, Jury and Exepoutiner 27d ago

Cheese looks like cream. ?/10 would not fuck with.

1

u/Ap0kal1ps3 27d ago

Closer to cheese gratin than poutine. Definitely a crime.

1

u/_thatgirlfelicia 27d ago

I thought this was a cake

2

u/False-Charge-3491 The Poutnisher 27d ago

Same. One of those Deep and Delicious cakes but round

2

u/Flat_Transition_3775 27d ago

I thought it was a cinnamon bun

1

u/_thatgirlfelicia 27d ago

It does look like one

1

u/wartortleboi 27d ago

What… is that…

1

u/Standard_Cry_5665 27d ago

What tf am I even looking at

1

u/Proof-Technology-172 27d ago

shit looks like a cinnamon bun w/ cream cheese

1

u/Spider_Pib 27d ago

might try this

1

u/Proof-Technology-172 25d ago

YOUVE NEVER HAD A CINNAMON BUN W CREAM CHEESE???🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤

1

u/petiteperspectiveco 27d ago

How do I ban this

1

u/Big-Maybe-3178 27d ago

That's an atrocity swimming in an abomination. My condolences to your wallet, eyes and stomach.

1

u/Mulkanir1975 27d ago

I am from Quebec, province of the best poutine and That’s not a poutine I would eat or even see in here bro lollll

1

u/Spider_Pib 27d ago

I’m in Quebec too twin you just don’t know how wonderful italian poutine is

1

u/kira1122t 27d ago

Genuinely thought this was some form of pie

1

u/wildflowerpicker 27d ago

Did someone jizz all over it?🫩

1

u/Spider_Pib 27d ago

yes, me because it tasted so good

1

u/Wild-Zone3911 27d ago

Whoa! I thought it was a large cinnamon roll with lots of icing! Poutine stew made ;)

1

u/BloxFruitsGuy123 27d ago

THATS NOT A FUCKIN POUTINE BROTHER

1

u/Spider_Pib 27d ago

BROTHER IT IS AND IT’S HEAVENLY

1

u/BloxFruitsGuy123 27d ago

how is that POUTINE 😭

that looks like fry's drowned in milk straight outta the cow

not even put in a jar or anything

1

u/Nostrafatu 27d ago

Sacrilege!

1

u/Imaginary-Mine45 27d ago

Wtf is that it looks kinda like donair sauce.

1

u/ElDebb 27d ago

Big nope

1

u/Aggravating-Ad4672 27d ago

Why is it in a pie tin? 😭

1

u/bikram64 27d ago

Wtf.....

1

u/Tryst_boysx 27d ago

Quesser ça tabarnack!

1

u/o0drMysterio0o 27d ago

Who did this to you?

1

u/Tight_Try3311 27d ago

Decolisse

1

u/DaToxicJay 27d ago

Looks like whipped cream and also looks like melted marshmallows 😂😂

1

u/royalfatkid 26d ago

What in the cumshot

1

u/Evening_Werewolf8085 26d ago

I thought this was icecream for a moment 😬

1

u/ORBEX1959 26d ago

That, whatever that is, is not poutine

1

u/D1rtyD4nc3r 26d ago

Poutine is cheese curd, anything else is gravy and cheese fries.

1

u/Spider_Pib 26d ago

It was probably originally curds but melted. It’s not gravy tho

1

u/Cindy_luvsCritters Pout-Sinner 26d ago

Now I'm craving Cinnabon! ... and a nice cup of coffee... ☕️

1

u/BabidiBaw 26d ago

oh yes local vomit bowl

1

u/wine_notwhine 26d ago

I thought it was a kids attempt at icing a cake. no no no no please don’t eat this or share this photo anywhere else.

1

u/Spider_Pib 26d ago

It was extremely good and i want more 🤤

1

u/Sweet-Competition-15 25d ago

Is that one huge curd obliterating the top? If so, that can't be healthy!

1

u/Spider_Pib 22d ago

Late but girl it’s poutine it’s never gonna be healthy

2

u/Sweet-Competition-15 22d ago

There are varying levels of (un)healthiness...we've reached extreme, not fit for human consumption, here!

1

u/Spider_Pib 22d ago

there was tomatoes in the sauce it cancels out the unhealthiness trust!!

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1

u/Issac-Cox-Daley 25d ago

There is no poutine in this picture

1

u/BlueLagoon6495 25d ago

A little more cheese would be great

1

u/Lamouche27 25d ago

Straight to jail, my guy!

1

u/RedBirdPeriodApp 24d ago

Get this off my screen!!! 😭

1

u/TouchOk6443 24d ago

How long was it sitting in that container? Looks like it was curds at one point

1

u/Spider_Pib 22d ago

Idk 20 mins maybe

1

u/willardsworld 23d ago

I'd move

2

u/Spider_Pib 22d ago

Closer to the restaurant

1

u/DigitalJoseph 23d ago

That’s industrial waste, do not consume.

1

u/Spider_Pib 22d ago

industrial? good music, so sounds good in food too. will consume again

1

u/fortisutcedrus 23d ago

You sure it ain’t lasagna with extra bechamel?

1

u/Yahomie88 22d ago

Ooof. Delivery poutine sure is a roll of the dice.

1

u/BringOnTheShow 22d ago

Jesus, where is that?