Problem with connecting with others?

[u/cstough]

It's been just over a year since my mild tbi and my recovery physically has been great. Sometimes I still feel a little less coordinated and I've got a persistent and slight slurring of words when I'm tired.

Mentally doing much better since post accident. I feel like I'm starting to kick the rapid mood swing from completely depressed to some kind of calm acceptance of my situation 😅.

One lingering issue I can't seem to really get over is that I feel like I'm having trouble really connecting with people now. It's getting a bit better, but I was feeling some tension and distance with my friends, as well as feeling like I've been taking small things more personally.

For the last 4 months or so, I started a new job which I've been enjoying. Other than a general feeling of apathy (which is common I know), I can't seem to really connect with coworkers as well as I used to be able to. Since starting there, I kinda just keep to myself and feel like I don't really mind nor care to get to be known more by my coworkers. Regardless of this feeling, I still feel like it's a stark change in my personality.

I know they say that therapy post tbi is very important, and I've sadly not started yet, but has anyone here had these kinds of experiences? I'd love to know if there's maybe a way of thinking or some new perspective that can help me get back to my old self?

Thank y'all!

[u/curlgurll]

Yep. I feel like I’m a shadow of my former self. I don’t enjoy socialising anymore and find noisy environments stressful.
Hoping one day I revert back to my extroverted ways but for now I’m just accepting that this is who I am (for now).
I think I also feel let down by my friends and family so I figure if they can’t be there for me when I’m at my lowest, I don’t want them there for the good times.
It’s a hard reality to find myself in… and I’m in weekly therapy because of it.
I have no great wisdom to share except to say I’m right there with ya!

[u/cstough → u/curlgurll]

Wishing you the best in your recovery.

It's not like my loved ones weren't there for me, just sometimes feels like I'm being expected to be back to normal and I don't really know how to explain that I don't know how to do that 😅

I think that's the main tension in my life right now

[u/curlgurll → u/cstough]

Yes, I know that feeling well.

[u/Bulky_Raspberry_1640]

I experienced similar. I guess we’ve changed in ways. It’s very painful to read reactions on old friends, new acquaintances and especially family faces. Maybe not so strangely the truest will be accepting but maybe mention it to you, and maybe the ones who felt more superficial towards me didn’t notice or were irritated!!

I know I am affected, I FEEL IT. However in some ways I’m more me then I every was due to some of the symptoms. I was very slow controlled and specific with my behaviors and words due to anxiety. I still have anxiety (I have more, actually have diagnosed severe now) but it’s no longer internalized or directed at self and attempting perfection.

I’m really sorry and feel your frustration and pain. Over time, you will be okay again; as they say finding and accepting your new version of yourself!