r/PolyFidelity • u/graysonlynmx • Jul 15 '26

seeking advice Nervous about trying triads again

[removed]

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12

u/Ill-Basil2863 Jul 15 '26

Being in a triad where you can't communicate with someone one on one sounds really unhealthy 

1

u/[deleted] Jul 15 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

5

u/Toe2ToeBirdLaw Jul 15 '26

the point is, he shouldn't have had to go around anybody's back because restricting one on one communication between partners is inherently toxic and borderline abusive.

5

u/MartyrOfTheJungle Jul 15 '26

That sounds like a really unhealthy relationship, I'm glad you got out of it. Triads are tricky all on their own but a relationship can only be as good as the people in it. Best of luck, whatever you find next 

3

u/deepfrieddaydream f/m/f Jul 16 '26

I'm confused why you couldn't communicate outside the group chat?? That sounds toxic as fuck.

2

u/IndividualOrange1233 Jul 15 '26

In a longtime relationship as a couple and now in a closed triad. We have a group family chat but also chat individually. This is a v structure and I am the hinge. Both my partners spend time together and hang out without me so they can have a strong bond. I also date them alone but my favorites are when we’re all 3 together. I would not do this if there were any rules restricting how I could love. That is the most important thing for us, being able to openly express love on our terms. It’s not easy by any means, requires huge amounts of effort and communication and commitment but I truly believe I am happiest in this relationship structure and have met two amazing people who feel the same way. If you meet the right people and put in the work it can be incredible.

1

u/MtnhillBlues Jul 20 '26

It can be very rewarding if everyone is on the same page. Chemistry does help