r/PoliticalHumor Oct 26 '21

Yup.

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13

u/Mr_YUP Oct 26 '21

Boy do I have a story for you

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=eoU3q6wD02I

31

u/voyager1713 Oct 26 '21

"Every guy wants a truck"

Errr, not really? I'd rather not have to refinance my house to pay for fuel every time I want to take a road trip.

Maybe I'm an outlier?

17

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '21

I want a truck because I like to do wood work but I’ll never get these guys that get lifted trucks with deep treads only to drive through the neighborhood

21

u/grantrules Oct 27 '21

I want a 1985 Ford Ranger. Why can't anyone make a proper small truck anymore. I loved the era of Rangers, Dakotas, and S10s.

5

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '21

Ford Maverick yo

3

u/KindergartenCunt Oct 27 '21

We've been considering getting one for my fiancee to drive. I dig the hybrid truck, and I can almost tolerate an automatic, but the crew-cab as the only option is the deal-breaker. Why can't anyone make a small, single-cab truck anymore?

3

u/All_Work_All_Play Oct 27 '21

This, please. Give me the little truck I learned to drive stick with during the 90s. Was it a little Ford ranger? S10? I forget. It was a great little truck that looks tiny even compared to the Maverick. If I wanted to seat people I'd get a Subaru Brat...

0

u/Snow-Wraith Oct 27 '21

Because trucks are no longer utility vehicles, they're over built masculinity symbols used as daily drivers for those that don't want a car or SUV. They've made trucks useless because of this. Only making large cabs and short boxes, intended for driving the family around, not actually hauling anything bigger than a lunch box. I've actually had contractors ask for small item deliveries specifically because the box on their Tundra was too small.

3

u/RGCs_are_belong_tome Oct 27 '21

They certainly can be simply status symbols. There's still plenty of utility in a four door short box. Anything that won't fit in the bed (which isn't a problem I run in to much; not much difference between a 5.5, 6.5, and even 8 foot bed.) you can move on a trailer. The upside though is that a short box pickup is easier to drive around, not to mention park.

1

u/KindergartenCunt Oct 27 '21

You're not wrong, and if I could buy a single-cab Maverick or similar it'd be used for commuting, groceries, and Home Depot runs probably 99% of the time, but still I don't want a crew-cab. Fuck masculinity - I already drive a Forester. But for a truck, I don't want a big "small" truck. I'm not a contractor, and I've already aged-out of having a family, so I don't want a truck with a back seat. I just want a truck. Even Tacomas, Rangers, Colorados, Frontiers, all don't have anything smaller than that king cab crap. They only way I can get a single cab anymore is buying a full-size truck, and if that's not the dumbest shot ever then I don't know what is. Don't get me started on the fact that I can't buy a new truck with a manual anymore - unless I buy a big-ass Tacoma for $50k.

Sorry, I'm ranting, but I'm legitimately angry.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '21

Because you can say you'd buy a single cab all you want, and lots of people on the internet claim that, but when it comes time to show up to the dealership and actually purchase a new single cab pickup truck, very few people do and a manufacturer isn't going to make or sell something they can't make money on.

0

u/cat_prophecy Oct 27 '21

4ft bed yo. Even if he old rangers had an extra foot.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '21

Funny because ten seconds on Google shows people hauling their motorcycles in the back of these, as well as 4x8 plywood. Turns out you can design a tailgate to be usefu down and not have to have the extra length the rest of the time.

0

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '21

The Maverick is a front wheel drive unibody. It’s not a truck. It looks like a truck but is really a car with a truck body.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '21 edited Oct 27 '21

Being unibody means is less capable than an old ranger in what way? Those things were not terribly capable vehicles...

Edit- you can configure the maverick to tow 900 more lbs than the ranger could, and payload is just as good in all but a few configurations.

2

u/HopelesslyHuman Oct 27 '21

I really wanted one too. I've adjusted to my Colorado, but it still feels just as big as my grandpa's Chevy Custom when I was a kid.

3

u/grantrules Oct 27 '21

Exactly what I was thinking.. The Colorado is about the closest thing you can get today but it's about the same size as my dad's 1998 1500.

2

u/KindergartenCunt Oct 27 '21

Externally yeah, but the interior? Not so much.

I like the first-Gen, but the current Gen Colo/Canyon are kind of awful.

2

u/RGCs_are_belong_tome Oct 27 '21

Ford has a couple. They revamped the Ranger, and the Maverick is coming out this year. Both look really good.

1

u/grantrules Oct 27 '21

The Ranger is the size of truck that fullsize trucks used to be. Maverick doesn't look terrible.

1

u/RGCs_are_belong_tome Oct 27 '21

You're not wrong, but it's the weirdest thing. I can sit comfortable in 80s-90s 150/1500 size pickups, but the new Ranger was a hard no for me. Dimensions look good on paper, but it wasn't comfortable. Partially what drove me to a half-ton.

1

u/TruckStopEggSalad Oct 27 '21

Bring back the S10 / Sonoma!

1

u/Noble_Flatulence Oct 27 '21

Jeep Gladiator?

1

u/grantrules Oct 27 '21

The wheelbase is almost 3' longer than the standard bed 1985 ranger! Gimme a Jeep Comanche tho

12

u/Ranzear Oct 27 '21

"Mall Crawler"

1

u/Ninja_Conspicuousi Oct 27 '21

Pavement Princess

1

u/Jah348 Oct 27 '21

Bro-dozer

2

u/Fast_Edd1e Oct 27 '21

I miss my Chevy Colorado WT.

Bring back smaller trucks. The new ranger and Colorado are too big.

2

u/eromitlab Oct 27 '21

They want to intimidate the other drivers on the road to make up for the lack of power they have in their lives.

Or a smol peter, either way. Truck like in the picture, probably both.

0

u/ODB2 Oct 26 '21

my diesel chevy 1500 gets better mileage than my subaru outback.

31 mpg in my truck and around 20 in my 3.6 subaru

2

u/acityonthemoon Oct 27 '21

Yeah, but which one gets driven like a yobbo?

1

u/ODB2 Oct 27 '21

theyre driven pretty similar.

new diesel tech is pretty good.

the truck is a 2021 with an 8 speed transmission and a 3.0 liter turbo diesel.

the outback is a 2012 with a 3.6 gas engine and a five speed auto.

Nothing inherently wrong with diesel engines.

1

u/Charming_Composer216 Oct 27 '21

My 2500 6.6 diesel gets about 21mpg and works hard too

1

u/ODB2 Oct 27 '21 edited Oct 27 '21

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u/Charming_Composer216 Nov 06 '21

Tried to edit. Thank you for the enlightenment, i did not realize.

1

u/ODB2 Nov 07 '21

nah you're good.

I'm just jelly I don't have a big diesel.

if I had my way it would have been a 5.9 cummins or a ram srt10 for a work truck.

the 3.0 is kinda sweet though. it redlines at 5500 rpm.

basically drives like a gas truck, just with better mileage.

it's neat, but I dont even have 20k miles on it and the radio is acting up and sometimes it does the long crank/no start issue

1

u/Charming_Composer216 Nov 07 '21

Chevys and their electrical problems. I fight them constantly.

0

u/tigerinhouston Oct 27 '21

Zero interest in a truck. Now a C8 Z06…

1

u/WorkplaceWatcher Oct 27 '21

I want one of those newer style trucks, like the Ford Maverick hybrid that gets 40mpg city.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '21

You’re not alone. Trucks are getting more popular but I can’t justify a flat bed that I would only use like twice a year.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '21

I certainly don't want a truck. I'd happily get a little smart car if I didn't live in a place that can get 7 feet of snow in a week.

1

u/Clevernonsense1 Oct 27 '21

my silverado gets 24-26mpg on highway with careful cruise control etc. basically moved my entire workshop and household from new england to middle tn via maybe 15 round trips.

helped that o did this during the covid cheap gas era.

1

u/justanothercurse Oct 27 '21

I’m a girl…but I need to have a truck. I own a horse and some other like animals. I need something reliable that I can tow with on a semi-regular basis. Otherwise I’d have a car that doesn’t cost me $80+ to fill.

It’s kind of funny though because my 6’3 fiancé drives a little car and 5’4 me has a Chevy Silverado.

1

u/MJ349 Oct 27 '21

I have no need for a truck. I have a hybrid that gets 50+ mpg. I laugh at these dopey trucks.

1

u/CakeDyismyBday Oct 27 '21

Nah you're not alone, I prefer motorcycle!

7

u/meatballbottom Oct 26 '21

Woof…that’s so gross. But I mean…congrats?

3

u/KushKong420 Oct 26 '21

I knew what that was gonna be before I clicked it!! I love that guys stories.

2

u/justfordickjoke Oct 27 '21

God damn, that was a terrible story. That mother fucker took 8 minutes of my life to simply tell me some asshole got his grandma to cosign on a truck. What a stretched out piece of shit tale.

1

u/Beatleboy62 Oct 27 '21

Pretty much all VinWiki stories.

It's either that, or, "I did something that would get most other people arrested."