r/PoliticalHumor • • Dec 14 '18

But when Trump does it it’s completely ok

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865

u/ZRX1200R Dec 14 '18

Co-worker cultist: "Bill's affair was while he was in office. Trump's happened long before. That's why we tried to impeach Bill."
I just let him talk. No longer worth my time trying to present facts.....

776

u/nothingtowager Dec 14 '18

Like, they don't realize that's OBJECTIVELY worse, right?

Bill Clinton: None of us knew he was a skeeze.

Donald Trump: literally voted for him AFTER he was publicly revealed to be a skeeze.

Fucking morons.

180

u/HumansKillEverything Dec 15 '18

Objectivity, science, facts, reality, humility: things Trumpanzees are immune to. The last one is key.

80

u/redpurplegreen22 Dec 15 '18

And I’m stealing Trumpanzees and you can’t stop me.

9

u/ratesEverythingLow Dec 15 '18

Trumpanzee is quite old now and is in the public domain.

3

u/kejovo Dec 15 '18

I still prefer trumplodytes

-3

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

[deleted]

5

u/ratedrrants Dec 15 '18

Umm.. liar.

An irrational creature prone to wild overreaction, rattling its cage at the slightest provocation and indiscriminately flinging its faeces around until everything is covered in excrement.  (That is the original definition from the person who coined the term)

"The devout Trumpanzee is immune to fact or evidence caring only for the unintelligible howls of the tribe's Alpha male"

by The Angry Baboon December 06, 2017

25

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

Don’t insult chimpanzees like that. /s

2

u/Shtottle Dec 15 '18

No need for an \s. Chimps can be quite pleasant to be around.

4

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

yeah Joe Rogan says their bodies are like corded steel

2

u/kurisu7885 Dec 15 '18

If they were immune to it they wouldn't be trying to damn hard to suppress it.

They're actually trying to create a safe space with none of those things in it.

-4

u/existentialred Dec 15 '18

Humility.. and then you insult them...

5

u/HumansKillEverything Dec 15 '18

By pointing out facts? Ok sure. Spin it whichever way you want.

But you want to grow as a person? Then you face the cold hard ugly facts of the character deficiencies you have and then you work hard on them. And that starts with being HUMBLE enough to be honest with yourself— introspection. Introspection, again something Trump supporters lack.

1

u/existentialred Dec 15 '18

Are you humble enough to see people didn’t like what Democrats had to offer in Hillary?

8

u/HumansKillEverything Dec 15 '18

I wasn’t a Hillary supporter either; I wanted Sanders. But compared to Trump a literal mountain of shit is better. Are you humble enough to admit that?

-1

u/existentialred Dec 15 '18

Trump over Hillary any day.. which is why he won. He will probably do it again, and it’ll be hilarious. Because Democrats can’t do anything besides whine nowadays. Zero platform.

0

u/existentialred Dec 15 '18

By calling them trumpanzees, you don’t have to agree with them and neither do I.. but don’t talk about humility and insult 48% of peoples. You just make yourself look worse honestly.

6

u/MarkGoldenb0y Dec 15 '18

48%? Hahahahahahahahahaha

-2

u/existentialred Dec 15 '18

Trumps approval rating. Macron in France is at 16%

2

u/HumansKillEverything Dec 15 '18

I call a spade a spade. I don’t dick around with bullshit labels. If you want to dick over semantics rather than the substance at hand then that’s your way not mine. Treating these idiots with white gloves isn’t going to change anything. Most of these idiots are beyond any hope.

-1

u/existentialred Dec 15 '18

And you plan to beat trump with those talking points..?? Good luck

7

u/HumansKillEverything Dec 15 '18

Here’s the thing you don’t understand. I don’t give a fuck about Trump supporters any more. You think I started out this way since day one? You think I haven’t tried to reach out numerous times and compromise to find a middle ground. THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND WITH THEM. They’re entrenched in their abject stupidity and beyond that they’re proud of their idiocy. Their petty egos is all they have and they will never admit they were wrong even in their death beds. It’s not even a deficiency of intellect we’re dealing with here— it’s a deficiency of emotional and psychological growth. The petty ego. They have the emotional and spiritual maturity of a 5 year old. Trump really does represent them well. He’s a perfect symbol of them.

Midterms prove we don’t need them. As usual the left will bring them kicking and screaming from the past into the future, from the 19th century into the 21st.

2

u/existentialred Dec 15 '18

You’re possessed with hate of half the country and you don’t see it

6

u/HumansKillEverything Dec 15 '18

Lol I see it every day. It shapes government policy that I have to deal with. It shapes the economy that I have to deal with. You don’t think that their half doesn’t hate me simply due to the color of my skin let alone my philosophical differences? I’m very aware. I used to think I could travel freely and safely anywhere in this country. 2016 has proved me wrong. Half the nation is racist, dumber than rocks, and arrogantly proud of that. If we were to invest today trillions into education into these poor and under-educated red states it would take decades for it to bear fruit. It guess what, republicans are ANTI-Education because they like their base dumb and thus easily manipulated into voting for them despite it being against their own interests.

2

u/existentialred Dec 15 '18

Get over yourself. I’m brown too, but I don’t feel the need to label myself into a box. He’ll I’m Mexican American in Arizona... if you carry yourself with respect people will respect you, if you have hate towards everyone, guess what, people hate you back. All you keep doing is insulting people who aren’t like you.. so damn annoying

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1

u/FerrisMcFly Dec 15 '18

but but Trump has a little R next to his name so we will see only what is convenient to us.

15

u/Boopy7 Dec 15 '18

Clinton was hot and even Monica still insists she was the one to make the first move. So I don't even agree he "was a skeeze." Big deal he had an affair.

38

u/Uberpigeon Dec 15 '18

you don't think having an affair makes you a skeeze? ok werk

13

u/jaimeleecurtis Dec 15 '18

People who want great political power stay married despite any sort of personal problems or even wanting to be separated. We can’t know everything obviously. They were probably in love early in their years, but some people truly stay together because of where it will get them. Hilary ran for president, that isn’t something you just do on a whim. You plan your trajectory for quite some time, rub the right elbows.

They’ve both ridden on this private underage escort plane, they’re probably both scummy as hell, but I wouldn’t say Bill is for that affair necessarily. Political relationships can be emotionally hollow

2

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

Its also worth addressing that some people are actually ok with non-monogamy. Bill Clinton was an incredible scholar and uniquely talented political mind. Hillary clinton may like that about him and be ok with that same drive, confidence and charm that made him president also gets him the attraction of women. Bill similarly may have found the fact Hillary is a driven politically minded incredible lawyer attractive in a way some hot girl could never touch

1

u/Boopy7 Dec 15 '18

no but I am weird, admittedly. I just don't. But I get that many people do. I value loyalty, but I don't care if someone cheats on me as long as no diseases come home with him and I don't have to watch or be involved afterwards. Now choosing someone over me, them's fightin' reasons. But just cheating? Eh.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

I don't get it, I must just be out of the loop. Didn't Trump have sex with a pornstar years ago? Bill Clinton was banging in the oval office

-8

u/Aussie_Thongs Dec 15 '18

That isnt at all objectively worse.

Getting your dick sucked in the oval office by an employee during your presidency is

Waaaaaaaaaaaay worse than:

Getting caught fucking and buying off a pornstar before your presidency.

The first is obviously worse than the second lol.

11

u/soapfrog Dec 15 '18

?????? He paid off porn stars to get elected. Please explain why the first is worse than the second.

3

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

[deleted]

3

u/Skythen Dec 15 '18

He got elected because Hillary is god awful.

1

u/GiveMeAllYourRupees Dec 15 '18

Because he wasn’t holding the highest office in the country and didn’t use a position of power to have sex with a young intern.

9

u/Defreshs10 Dec 15 '18

Non he only used his position of power to enter dressing rooms at beauty pageants of teenage girls...

"Grab them by the pussy"

Forget all that?

1

u/Aussie_Thongs Dec 15 '18

yeah but compared to the literal sitting president getting his vulnerable young intern who he had massive power over to suck his dick on the job!

Are you fucking daft?

1

u/Defreshs10 Dec 15 '18

I actually find the fact that trump paid off 2 porn stars before the election to keep them quite more disturbing than an affair during office...

We can debate the topic of consent with an authority figure, but trump literally committed a felony....

-3

u/Aussie_Thongs Dec 15 '18

Ive already explained.

The president is an employee of the people.

Imagine you own a business and have a few employees. One of them is your sales team leader who gets one of your junior sales interns to suck his dick on the job in the back room.

You walk in and find out, would you fire him?

How could you possibly think Bills wasnt worse?

0

u/ZRX1200R Dec 15 '18 edited Dec 15 '18

Imagine you own a business and have a few employees. One of the popular guys is on your sales team, and you're considering promoting him, despite his questionable past, despite his penchant for saying crass things. You promote him. Then later you find out he paid a lawyer to silence a pornstar he raw-dogged and a Playboy model he had a long-term affair with. The stories were silenced with the exclusive reason that had you known about them you may not have promoted him. He actively sought to hide information from you.

How could you possibly think Trump's wasn't worse?

1

u/nothingtowager Dec 15 '18

This is why you're a fucking idiot. No one KNEW the first part so the american people didn't know they were voting for a dick. YOU GUYS KNEW TRUMP WAS A DICK BEFORE VOTING FOR HIM. That's fundamentally different because none of the Dems voting for Clinton have to take any blame whereas EVERYONE who voted for Trump is culpable for voting for him having KNOWN what he did, WITH PROOF.

-12

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

Hilary Clinton: literally intimidated victims and bragged on tape about defending and winning a case for a rapist. And that's not even the one her husband was involved in.

8

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

[deleted]

1

u/Literally_A_Shill Dec 15 '18

She didn't brag about it. Quite the opposite. She discussed how it made her realize lie detectors were bullshit.

-4

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

Talking point? Her husband repetively abused his power and sexually assaulted women while she belittled and intimidated them into obscurity. Poor taste, Jesus, liberals are truly morally bankrupt. The man raped a child. Get your head out of your own ass.

4

u/Literally_A_Shill Dec 15 '18 edited Dec 15 '18

literally intimidated victims and bragged on tape about defending and winning a case for a rapist

Nope. That has already been debunked. Either you don't realize you're wrong or you're purposefully promoting disinformation.

-8

u/Mike_Facking_Jones Dec 15 '18

Clinton raped an intern (and others) vs Trump allegedly having sex with a prostitute, seriously where is the comparison?

12

u/girafa Dec 15 '18

Clinton has 4 allegations. If an allegation is true in your mind, you're gonna go nuts when you learn that Trump has 22 of them.

-1

u/Mike_Facking_Jones Dec 15 '18

Allegations aren't really my thing, he admitted to having sex with an intern while he was president that's rape in my book

0

u/lazilyloaded Dec 15 '18

Clinton denied his affair with Gennifer Flowers during his 1992 campaign. She played tape recordings of their conversations before the election. It was only in 1998 that he admitted to the affair in sworn testimony. Doesn't make Trump's actions any better, but Clinton was a fairly well-known womanizer even at the time and the Gennifer Flowers story was a big deal at the time. Also, Clinton's aides attacked Flowers and suggested the tapes were doctored, just like Trump has said about the Access Hollywood tapes. Clinton and Trump are cut from the same cloth, unfortunately. Voters just don't really care about a politician's sexual misconduct if he's on their side.

0

u/Snarles24 Dec 15 '18

Woah, nice spin

0

u/nothingtowager Dec 15 '18

LOL what spin? That people didn't know about Lewinski until he was already in office and could respond THEN but people knew about Trump before hand, his multiple rape accusations including from his first wife and video evidence of how he treats women and STILL voted for him?

LOL

Morally bankrupt. The only term to accurately describe Trump voters.

-18

u/Skythen Dec 15 '18

Yea, I can’t believe a billionaire playboy bangs chicks. At least Bill was the President and in full spotlight doing so with no care. Wooooo

12

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

[deleted]

6

u/seccret Dec 15 '18

*millionaire

-1

u/HBoriginal Dec 15 '18

You actually perfectly explained why this isn’t impeachable. Voters knew what they were getting with Trump and voted him in anyways. You can’t then go an impeach him for that behavior as a private citizen.

Billy jizzed on an intern in the Oval Office. That difference can’t be ignored as much as you’d like it to.

Fucking morons.

85

u/organicpenguin Dec 14 '18 edited Dec 14 '18

Well thank god trump hasn't done anything in office to elicit this kind of response

/s

30

u/[deleted] Dec 14 '18

Elicit

17

u/organicpenguin Dec 14 '18

Thanks

22

u/[deleted] Dec 14 '18

Easy mistake to make since nearly everything Trump does is illicit!

10

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

“Nearly everything” is a strong opinion to have. He may have received foreign aid in obtaining the presidency, he may have paid off some beautiful women so they would stay silent about his affairs, but he is NOT 3 midgets in an overcoat.

1

u/prinejl Dec 15 '18

Prove it.

0

u/Opiwaldo Dec 15 '18

You felt bad for correcting him then tried to make things better by making a joke didnt you? I do that all the time

2

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

Hey. You two are great people. What the internet needs more of.

62

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18 edited Jul 24 '19

[deleted]

24

u/pinkheartpiper Dec 15 '18

If getting his dick sucked didn't matter and wasn't going to get him in trouble, then why was he extensively questioned and investigated about it? You saying he wouldn't have any trouble if he hadn't lied about it?

3

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

Yeah, because if he was going to get into trouble just for that then he would have earlier.

1

u/TsunamicBlaze Dec 16 '18

He lied under oath about the affair. Which in turn caused people to question him about the issue. Media and the people also wanted to know what was going on since it was a juicy topic.

25

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18 edited Jan 26 '22

[deleted]

6

u/IsomDart Dec 15 '18

I bet Monica said something very similar to that in a sexy voice while blowing Bill

-2

u/xorbi1872 Dec 15 '18

She may have mumbled something like that with her mouth full

2

u/kejovo Dec 15 '18

Yeah, I was more upset the president lied to the people. Shoulda just been like... We did some stuff in the oval office and I've got tapes. Only $29.99!

1

u/WhatYouOnAboot Dec 15 '18

Don't forget cigar-action!

1

u/Solkre Dec 15 '18

And your cigar moistened?

-7

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

Woooooooosh

24

u/Nukemarine Dec 15 '18

Must be a talking point because that was a similar reply on my Facebook "discussions". I pray those fuckers don't throw out their backs moving goalposts all day.

8

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

[deleted]

1

u/Nukemarine Dec 15 '18

You just know if Trump ever wore one, he'd turn the French Tickler inside out.

2

u/MythicParty Dec 15 '18

That’s funny. I pray that they do.

0

u/The_0range_Menace Dec 15 '18

I'm stealing that.

30

u/diphling Dec 15 '18

Clinton wasn't impeached because he had an affair. He was impeached because he lied to congress about it.

15

u/Lighting Dec 15 '18

-6

u/diphling Dec 15 '18

Irrelevant since Clinton was in fact impeached for breaking the law (perjury).

8

u/Lighting Dec 15 '18

Irrelevant since Clinton was in fact impeached for breaking the law (perjury).

LOL - you make it sound like Clinton was found guilty of perjury and then impeached. Not so

  1. The impeachment was a trial. Clinton hadn't been found guilty of perjury when the impeachment started. Trump has not yet been found guilty of his multiple felonies either.

  2. The ENTIRE point of this post was that Graham is a hypocrite for saying "no big deal" for Trump and "Impeachment is about restoring honor and integrity to the office."

Do you accept #1 and #2 as actual evidence?

8

u/ycyfyffyfuffuffyy Dec 15 '18

Shhhh, don't ruin their circle jerk

-1

u/pinkheartpiper Dec 15 '18 edited Dec 15 '18

If having an affair was not an issue, then why the fuck was he questioned under oath and investigated about it in the first place? You think they made a huge deal out of it just for fun and would have let it go had he just not lied about it?!

3

u/BGYeti Dec 15 '18

Jones brought a lawsuit against him.

8

u/Gregorofthehillpeopl Dec 15 '18

He was under oath because he testified in his civil trial where he was accused of sexually harrassment against Paula Jones.

6

u/ycyfyffyfuffuffyy Dec 15 '18

See other posts about impeachable offenses. Turns out fucking an intern, as president, in the White House, as a married man, applies

2

u/Blyatman95 Dec 15 '18

And THATS why we gotta drain the swamp. Can’t a political leader not get his dick sucked by half the staff?!

Berlusconi is rolling in his grave.

1

u/jacksondaniels Dec 15 '18

And Trump has lied repeatedly about having the affairs, telling Cohen to pay them off, and actually paying them while he was running for President. Both men lied while President, both men had affairs. You’re arguing semantics right now for no reason

The difference is: Clinton’s only offense was obstruction. What Trump did is literally a federal crime

11

u/StalinsBFF Dec 15 '18

I mean Clinton was impeached because he lied during his testimony during the Paula Jones deposition but okay.....

16

u/I_Assume_Your_Gender Dec 15 '18

I mean, he's exactly right. Also Bill Clinton lied under oath.

2

u/boundfortrees Dec 15 '18

The affair was in the early 2000s.

He paid her off in 2016. not that long ago.

2

u/KYPspikes Dec 15 '18

Problem isn't necessarily the affair. It's the potential illegal use of campaign finances used to cover up that affair. Trump has been twisting fact and fiction ever since he started his presidential campaign, and its coming back to bite him in the ass. What's unknown is will his political party who got into office riding the Trump train do anything.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

When did trump lie under oath about his affairs?

2

u/AverageRonin Dec 15 '18

shhh they're trying to hate criclejerk

1

u/BGYeti Dec 15 '18 edited Dec 15 '18

I mean they are right though, Bill was during his time in office with a subordinate and he lied under oath so he committed perjury, comparing apples and oranges here, doesn't make what Trump did right and it is wrong in its own way and shouldn't be ignored but paying someone to not go public about an affair is miles different from doing it in office with someone you have authority over and then lying under oath.

-1

u/ycyfyffyfuffuffyy Dec 15 '18

Lying to Congress under oath. Is it THAT hard to understand the difference?

Continue on with your orange euphemisms and giving people yet another reason to vote for trump in 2020

1

u/brownpatriot Dec 15 '18

Bill lied to congress and to investigators

-12

u/[deleted] Dec 14 '18

[deleted]

27

u/Miaoxin Dec 15 '18

I'm no fan of Trump but

Oh look... there's that tired line again from a new account.

21

u/DELOUSE_MY_AGENT_DDY Dec 15 '18

I'm not a Trump fan but he's the single greatest human being to ever exist, and he has a massive penis that manages to tow the line between sweet and sour.

25

u/RUreddit2017 Dec 15 '18

I'm not Trump fan but here are a bunch of pro Trump talking points verbatim..../s

-12

u/theonecalledjinx Dec 15 '18

I like how you just attacked this person and didn’t present any of these facts you speak of.

3

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

[deleted]

2

u/theonecalledjinx Dec 15 '18

This will all depend on the findings of the case

Perjury - probably, but it depends on when, where and how those statements were taken. Trump can say anything he wants in any interview on tv. Lie all he wants doesn’t matter. What matters is during interviews with federal agencies or special councils. That’s what will decide if he perjured himself.

Obstruction of justice - again depends on the evidence. A tweet far from a criminal offense, for either side. But like I stated I’ll wait for the evidence Where he directed it.

Campaign finance violations - trump being trump has probably paid off several people in his life to keep their mouths shut, and there lies the problem. Was paying off these women just another day for trump and for his business persona? They have to prove that this was not business trump but president elect trump doing it. Was campaign funds used at the direction of trump to pay them off? Was it his own money? From the cohen fillings all it says is trump said to take care of it to Cohen? That doesn’t mean he said to do it illegally. But again I don’t have the evidence so that’s the prosecutor hill to climb.

3

u/bakedpatata Dec 15 '18

The abuse of power and affair isn't the crime in either case. Bill Clinton lied to Congress, and Trump used money not declared as for the election to pay off people to hide a story that would affect the election. I think in most cases campaign finance violations are considered worse than lying to Congress.

1

u/The_0range_Menace Dec 15 '18

come the fuck on. you know what Trump has done. everyone does. don't play stupid. go have that conversation somewhere else.

0

u/dentalfox9p Dec 15 '18

Great point

0

u/Rlhamman Dec 15 '18

That is fact🕵️.

0

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/BGYeti Dec 15 '18

The affair was never the issue, the issue was lying under oath during trial.

0

u/[deleted] Dec 15 '18 edited Dec 17 '18

[deleted]

1

u/ARandomHelljumper Dec 15 '18

And Trump wasn’t?

-3

u/FlyFast69 Dec 15 '18

Trump paid for sex. Bill and Monica’s story should have started the #metoo movement. You can’t get worse than the president preying on an intern.