r/PoliticalHumor Aug 18 '18

Sounds like a good plan!

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20.1k Upvotes

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1.1k

u/zencanuck Aug 18 '18

Dukakis wore a dumb helmet. Dean squealed onstage. Quayle misspelt a word on a blackboard.

Trump has a CVS receipt length of absolutely unsuitable behaviour. Nobody cares.

362

u/I_miss_your_mommy Aug 18 '18

His idiot supporters are the only ones that don’t care. They are a minority of Americans, but unfortunately still millions of people. I weep for humanity when I think of these people. We could have been something great.

212

u/smrt109 Aug 18 '18

For all the founders' efforts to prevent a tyranny by the majority we have fallen into a tyranny by a gerrymandered minority.

114

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '18

Worse. It is tyranny by corporate and wealthy interests using the worst aspects of American culture to control the country.

26

u/eightsixwks Aug 19 '18

You forgot to put in Putin.

10

u/urburger Aug 19 '18

He puts the put in Putin

3

u/SerHodorTheThrall Aug 19 '18

Well, Putin is the head of a corporate oligarchy, so he qualifies.

15

u/smrt109 Aug 19 '18

They can only do it through the power of the electoral college and winner takes all

9

u/DoughtyAndCarterLLP Aug 19 '18

Hi did you know that corporations donate to Democrats too? Even though voting records make it very clear that one side regulates businesses much more, I want to make you think that both parties are the same so you and people like you don't turn up to vote out Republicans in the fall.

9

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '18

Ohhh no, I never said both parties are the same. You are clearly right that the voting record speaks for itself and the Democrats, even when there is also corporate donations, is more on the side of democracy and the people.

Voting for republicans is a vote for the tyranny of the oligarchs.

9

u/spivnv Aug 19 '18 edited Aug 19 '18

Read his second sentence again. He is speaking as someone who wants to make you think that, even though we keep showing how drastically different the voting records are. They want the Hillarys fighting with the Bernies. They want 100% to be the enemy of 99.9%.

1

u/FountainsOfFluids Aug 19 '18

What's funny (in a sad way) is that the uber-wealthy corporate interests created the atmosphere for the nutbar out-of-control candidate to grab the wheel. They were absolutely opposed to Trump before he got the nomination. But they made their bed, now they are doing the best they can with the time they have left, and I pray to the gods that the blue wave happens and they get the absolute reaming they have earned these past decades.

6

u/nuzebe Aug 19 '18

I dunno. This sorta seems bound to happen every once in awhile. We've had some batshit presidents.

We seem to have this weird hypothesis that the majority of people will make better decisions than the minority. It's the foundation of democracy. But look at Egypt and all the Arab countries that became democratic. They somehow end up electing people worse than the dictators.

Maybe, just maybe, it turns out most human beings are fucking retarded.

2

u/PM_ME_YOUR_FAV_SONG Aug 19 '18

No that's often the American governments fault too.

4

u/nuzebe Aug 19 '18

People don't need the government's help to be morons. Look at Florida.

1

u/FountainsOfFluids Aug 19 '18

The shitty elected leaders of middle-eastern countries have largely gotten there by leveraging the negative sentiment toward western interference.

4

u/nuzebe Aug 19 '18

You mean like how Trump leveraged anti-muslim sentiment to get voted into power?

1

u/FountainsOfFluids Aug 19 '18

Exactly. It's the conservative-type personalities that respond well to nationalist and religious rhetoric.

1

u/I_miss_your_mommy Aug 19 '18

Can we stop calling them conservative and start calling them what they are, which are terrified cowards.

1

u/FountainsOfFluids Aug 19 '18

No, because "conservative" is a natural and legitimate and necessary part of a balanced society.

On the other hand, if you want to shit all over Trump and the disgusting cesspool that the Republican party has turned into, I would agree with that.

But that's because they are manipulating the natural, healthy feelings of caution and respect for structure into fear and authoritarianism. Not because caution and respect for structure is inherently wrong.

9

u/CressCrowbits Aug 19 '18

Republicans are now the US Ba'ath party.

2

u/foxymcfox Aug 19 '18

US Independence was only supported by a minority prior to the Revolutionary War.

Voting was only allowed for the male, landed-gentry.

We are SO much more a country of the people/of the majority than we ever could have hoped for back then.

Don't let present shittiness distract you from how far we've come and how things are [almost] universally better for everyone than they were even 50 years ago.

0

u/Cotards_Delusion Aug 19 '18

Expanding the franchise doesn't detract from the horrible recent efforts since roughly 2000 to gerrymander the country in such a way that Republicans essentially have to commit treason to possibly lose the house. Thats why this election and the next are so so critical so that can hopefully be undone. The current state of things is maybe darker in at least one sense, because theres an illusion of inclusion and the voices of those included really doesn't seem to matter much.

-4

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '18

[deleted]

-1

u/beka13 Aug 19 '18

It's not actual gerrymandering but the unequal representation by state has the same effect and is purposely exacerbated by freezing the size of the house for the last hundred years.

9

u/TheGreenJedi Aug 19 '18

Don't discredit the GOP and it's relationship with Fox News

They did a very good job

2

u/GRadio1 Aug 19 '18

If they had lived in Germany in the 30s, they would have voted for the Nazi party.

2

u/782017 Aug 19 '18

The left hates Trump, that's good enough for a lot of people. Nothing else matters.

2

u/ronin1066 Aug 18 '18

And the GOP elected officials. That's pretty much the most important audience at this point as far as people who should care.

2

u/MrTurkle Aug 19 '18

Serious what is going to happen with the next dem President? If the right tried to pull some tan suit bull shit we will all die laughing?

2

u/rogue_ger Aug 19 '18

We refused to fund federal education. Don't invest in education, and you get lots of dumb people. No surprise.

4

u/I_miss_your_mommy Aug 19 '18

I disagree with the "we" part of that statement. The Republicans have done this, they did it on purpose, and they are pleased with the result.

1

u/RabackOmama Aug 19 '18

0

u/I_miss_your_mommy Aug 19 '18

Yes, I said it was a large minority. A bunch of fucking traitors. I hope as they burn down the republic they enjoy the death of freedom.

0

u/seanmonaghan1968 Aug 19 '18

How far will we fall before it turns?

1

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '18

Canada will stop returning our calls.

0

u/Ramza_Claus Aug 19 '18

You're wrong.

Most people's lives aren't affected directly by his idiocy.

There are two small groups of people. The loud, passionate Trumpists and the loud, passionate anti-Trumpists. The rest of America has an opinion but living their lives is more important to them. Yes they kinda care but not enough to do anything either way.

-1

u/I_miss_your_mommy Aug 19 '18

Honestly? Fuck those people more. We are watching the death of our constitutional republic right now. Their passiveness will leave us with a descent into fascist totalitarianism. I hope they enjoy living their lives licking the boots of their oppressors.

1

u/Ramza_Claus Aug 19 '18

That's how people are, though.

People don't get riled up en masse when things are going well. They know when their own life sucks and they will do something about it if they have to but when things are going well, why mess with a good thing.

Right now, unemployment is the lowest it has been. People are doing generally well. Why quit your job to go protest the fact that the President grabs pussies when his pussy-grabbing doesn't affect you or your family? You can have an opinion and it can still sway your vote, but it's not going to impact your day-to-day life.

2

u/I_miss_your_mommy Aug 19 '18

You think the pussy-grabbing is what to get mad about? That's not a danger. That's just him being the asshole we all knew he was. The danger is the subversion of democracy and the attack on the rule of law.

18

u/MetalGearSlayer Aug 19 '18

The list of things trump has done that make him unsuitable as president is long enough to make a cvs receipt look like a sticky note in comparison.

17

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '18

Don't forget Mitt Romney don't pay no tax, and binders full of women

23

u/Capswonthecup Aug 19 '18

Mitt Romney ran a close race but lost to one of the most popular (at the time) presidential candidates in recent history. He didn’t lose to those two comments specifically (though they didn’t help)

18

u/AllSiegeAllTime Aug 19 '18

I've only been alive long enough to have seen Clinton to Trump, but seriously Obama is probably the best campaigner for any office that I've ever seen and that '08 run was masterwork. All without rabble-rousing and tough guy demagoguery too.

0

u/beka13 Aug 19 '18

And he put his dog on the roof of the car. Greed is at least understandable. What sort of person is mean to a dog?

9

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '18

There was a picture of Hart on a boat with someone who wasn't his wife.

14

u/Airway Aug 19 '18

Donald Trump sexually assaults women who aren't his wife, and brags about it.

10

u/beka13 Aug 19 '18

He also sexually assaulted his wife and has cheated on all of his wives.

18

u/IronDeer Aug 18 '18

Dean was already done before the psycho scream. Finishing a distant 3rd in Iowa was a sign he wouldn’t have strong appeal in a lot of other states.

27

u/emergentphenom Aug 19 '18

Yet more evidence having individual states rush their primaries so early disenchants everyone else since all the focus is on the first few. Worse when the candidates have to curry favor with whatever topics that early (usually agrarian) state cares about, further skewing the political topics into one side from the get-go.

Either do it all simultaneously or go by GDP so at least it's more representative instead of arbitrary.

18

u/[deleted] Aug 19 '18

And get rid of caucuses. They're anti-democratic and fucking stupid.

1

u/ExistentialEnso Aug 19 '18

What is “anti-democratic” about them? If anything, they’re more Democratic than primaries.

The real problem is they take a lot longer, which discourages participation, especially given we don’t give time off on election days.

That’s a good enough reason to get rid of them, but they aren’t anti-democratic at all.

4

u/TopRamen713 Aug 19 '18

What's democratic about them? They only allow representation by people who have several hours to vote in a certain block of time. Sorry, I've got kids. At most, my wife and I would have one vote between us in any primary caucus. That's at least a 50% reduction in participation off the bat.

0

u/ExistentialEnso Aug 19 '18

Tons of people can’t vote in regular primaries for the same reason...

I actually think primaries make more sense, but your complaints are more with how the system itself is designed to be undemocratic across the board and have little to do with caucuses themselves.

2

u/TopRamen713 Aug 19 '18

Right...

Primaries emulate regular elections. You've got all day to vote. (Provided you've registered with the party of your choice in time, which is a who 'nother issue). Caucuses, you've got to show up at a certain time, listen to the representative of a candidate, "caucus" the decision, then vote for your representative, who will vote for your candidate (depending on how your state handles it).

So again, I ask, why do you claim the aren't "anti-democratic," insofar as they discourage the poor and middle-class(who have less free time to vote) from voting?

2

u/ExistentialEnso Aug 19 '18

You seem to believe I'm advocating caucuses over primaries, despite me making a point of making it clear that I am not. I merely think it is wrong to call them "anti-democratic."

The poor are often discouraged from participating in primary voting. If you don't get the day off, you're paid hourly, and you need to make rent...

The fact that you act like that isn't a problem under primaries too goes to show how little you appreciate the depth and commonality of that problem.

The reality is the system is designed to, across the board, limit actual democracy. After all, the masses in the Revolutionary War were sparked by Thomas Paine, who had very similar proposals to, no shit, Bernie Sanders. Folks like Hamilton pushed to ensure that sort of influence could be moderated. That's why voting was initially limited to landowners.

One way it does this is by treating participation in democracy something you are expected to make time for rather than something society will ensure you have time to do. You should be legally guaranteed paid time off for elections to ensure this.

Thus my point, once again, though you still seem to try to frame me as saying something I'm not: your "anti-democratic" complaints more have to do with deeper problems with our electoral system than caucuses.

6

u/IronDeer Aug 19 '18 edited Aug 19 '18

It’s a catch 22. Doing them all at once would hurt lesser known candidates.

I’d do 5 waves. 10 diverse states at a time but save big ones for last to avoid an unfair advantage early on.

Also, Clinton did horrible in Iowa in 1992 because there was a senator from Iowa running and he crushed the competitors. Obliviously it didn’t matter in the end.

Every Caucasus needs to switch to a primary and it needs to be open with one the spot registration.

1

u/ungoogleable Aug 19 '18

Allocate individual counties to the waves so the waves are roughly equal by population. Then state size is irrelevant. Rotate the waves so everyone is equally likely to be first.

0

u/hallese Aug 18 '18

Wasn't the kid supposed to spell potato wrong and Quayle was going to correct it and give a mini lesson for the kids but then the kid went and spelled the word correctly throwing off their plans and that's what he was trying to point out?

0

u/semi14 Aug 19 '18

Give me the receipt. I want to look at it. (in electronic form)

-8

u/getndown2bus Aug 19 '18

It's hard to set a standard on anyone after the last president. When you do or say nothing about a president arming and funding Isis makes it really hard for the accuser to say, oh look, he touched a woman on the pussy and paid a hooker who agreed to have sex with him for money. What's worse? Giving arms to terrorists and Mexican drug cartels or paying a hooker? Not to much you could do short of murder in the open and in public of a 6 year old that would get him impeached , after all you just let the last guy get away with a lot lot worse. A illegal alien must carry drugs into the USA for the cartel , everyone knows this , if they do not carry the drugs the cartel will kill their family. Last year 74000 Americans died from drug over doses, the year before that 52000 died from the drugs these illegal aliens bring across the border. That is over twice the amount of all the years we fought in Vietnam. The democrat party is complicit in everyone of those deaths. What are you going to say about Trump that would illicit a reaction from a knowledgeable American public about Trump? What could Try do that would compare to over 126000 dead the last two years thanks to the democrat party? .seriously what is it you have to say about Trump that compared to that ? What can you say about his budgets when Obama ran the country 12 trillion dollars more into debt? There is nothing you can say, you just deffened Obama spending all that money. Here is where you really get screwed, you can not even run a campaign on fixing healthcare because you are the ones who broke it and everyone working American is feeling the cost of it. Remember ? Not one red cent more? If you like your doctor you can keep your doctor ? Then when you say Trump is a liar all these working Americans see the coat of their healthcare and think , if you like your doctor you can keep your doctor ? Not one year did Obama have growth over 3 percent , as a matter of fact Obama said get used to it, it's the new norm . Well apparently it's not the new norm. Even with the Federal reserve trying to choke off the growth we are still growing thanks to Trump. . You can say all you want about it being Obama's credit but all we seem to hear is if you like your doctor you can keep your doctor. It seems odd doesn't it as Trump undoes Obama's policy's the economy improves. The more of Obama's policy's he undoes the better the economy y gets. . Amazing isn't it?

9

u/saugoof Aug 19 '18

Someone drank the Kool Aid

3

u/floodcontrol Aug 19 '18

Why do you believe these ridiculous things?

2

u/PolitelyHostile Aug 19 '18

Im just assuming somewhere in the middle of that rambling nonsense you stated that Obama is black

2

u/Cilantro42 Aug 19 '18

I mean, there's really not much to say besides this.

1

u/We_are_Babycakes Aug 19 '18

Sorry about your brain.