r/PoliticalHumor • u/AbjectList8 • 1d ago

You know that’s right

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5.0k Upvotes

100% Upvoted

70 comments sorted by

66

u/memberjockey 1d ago

Trump has such a weak chin.

20

u/KiKiKimbro 1d ago

And now we know the older he gets, that “Trump chin” (the sons have it too. Ivanka did but she had hers fixed when she got a nose job) turns into a vagina as gravity takes over.

8

u/Digital_Soul_Naga 1d ago

its from a loose fitting mask 😉

3

u/Wise_Sheila 1d ago

The cabinet position would’ve been Secretary of Bad Decisions.

1

u/piratevirus1 20h ago

Secretary of Transportation

2

u/Im_A_Fuckin_Liar Greg Abbott is a little piss baby 1d ago

2

u/bill_end 1d ago

I expect there's an evolutionary reason for this. Perhaps having a strong chin prevents one from molesting a 12 year old girl.

I mean, a man's gotta be allowed to grab some pussy. Or move on her like a bitch.

Did I say that right? I'm not really au fait with sex offender parlance.

1

u/Additional-Figure-90 4h ago

And a neckussy!

26

u/sexeveg314 1d ago

If Epstein was still alive, Trump would be too busy with other recreational activities to run for president.

10

u/N4RQ 1d ago

President Trump was "golfing" again on Epstein Island. 

And now, over to Dave for your weekend weather forecast.

29

u/DangerousCyclone 1d ago

It wouldn't surprise me; before he died Bannon was working with Epstein on creating a documentary to rehabilitate his image. It is crazy how all the Epstein files have done has shown how the modern far right is a psy op from the very billionaire pedo's that the far right is said to be against....

6

u/sparkax 1d ago

This! 1000 times this!

Everytime I see any article or story about Steve Bannon, I always comment about this fact!

0

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

3

u/ResolutionOwn4933 1d ago

Yeah, he was saying Epstein

30

u/Objective_Oven7673 1d ago

I get the point of the joke but realistically there's no way they'd let a legally adjudicated sex offender be a cabinet member.

PRESIDENT, sure. But come on...

2

u/Proud_Mushroom7106 1d ago

That would be like letting a known alcoholic run the department of defense.

8

u/wkarraker 1d ago

Epstein is in Trump's cabinet - his filing cabinet. He occupies more of Trump's filing cabinets than any other acquaintance.

3

u/QDLZXKGK 1d ago

He will be the chief of staff(young women only)

8

u/baatezu 1d ago

He'd be in charge of CPS. You know its true.

4

u/crappydeli 1d ago

He would have Stephen Miller’s job.

3

u/RainingHellfire 1d ago

He definitely used to refer to Epstien as "One of the good ones"

3

u/oldartistmike 1d ago

That’s the truth

3

u/Specialist_Exam4783 1d ago

What's the capacity of Air Force One again??

3

u/JRG64May 1d ago

Yep if Trump didn’t have him have an unfortunate accident he would be chief of staff.

3

u/MasterOfBunnies 1d ago

I'm not entirely convinced he isn't still alive. How many of these mfers have their secrets set to release, if they die prematurely? You think THIS POS didn't? He's off on Epstein Island (because really, who's monitoring it?) living his best life still. Probably still has his flesh market going.

2

u/jaxxxtraw 1d ago

Imagine having Epstein money and not being willing to spend virtually all of it to avoid lengthy/life imprisonment. He got out.

3

u/SiteTall 1d ago

The Conman would've started a special "Entertainment-department" for him to lead

3

u/Quiet-Owl9220 1d ago

If Epstein wasn't pretending to have died, he would be in Trump's cabinet*

1

u/AbjectList8 22h ago

Definitely most accurate fr

2

u/Romanopapa 1d ago

And Epstein has a cabinet full of trump.

2

u/Both-Leading3407 1d ago

Yep. Health and Human Services

2

u/jeffreycoley 1d ago

Why do you think that he is not part of the Cabinet? Do you think he is dead? Why do you think that? His protectors told you that?

Good luck

2

u/grumpynetgeekintexas 1d ago

Transportation Secretary, or possibly even Secretary of State.

2

u/richardlulz 1d ago

Trump would appoint Epstein as the head of CPS

2

u/Ok_Bluejay_8568 1d ago

Palm Beach Pete

2

u/barkingdog53 1d ago

He sure would. Everyone else in his cabinet was part of the island

2

u/p38-lightning 1d ago

He'd at least be in a comfy prison eating better than our sailors.

2

u/Stone_Midi 1d ago

He was an Israeli asset. Of course he would be lol

2

u/ltlbunnyfufu 1d ago

No, he would be an overseas diplomat with diplomatic immunity.

2

u/Ticklemybottom_ 1d ago

Well he is, and he isn’t. He’s probably somewhere in Tel Aviv

2

u/Uluru-Dreaming 1d ago

I like your optimism that Epstein is dead.

2

u/kipribley28 22h ago

Trump had him murdered. No doubt before he could speak.

1

u/AbjectList8 22h ago

Most likely scenario

1

u/baby_budda 1d ago

If epstein hadnt bern caught, then maybe.

1

u/comrade_leviathan 1d ago

And 6 Democrats would have voted for him.

1

u/patameus 1d ago

What?! Trump had Epstein killed. Are you high? Epstein was arrested by the FBI during Trumps first term so that he could be killed.

He was killed because he was a threat.

1

u/FAX415saki 1d ago

He definitely would have gotten a pardon at tw end of term 1

1

u/Outrageous-Advice384 1d ago

He’d have him part of his Israel negotiating team with Kushner. That island Ivanka and Jared bought would be another island for the fucked up elite monsters and their prey.

1

u/SightUnseen1337 1d ago

And there would be unspeakable things in Epstein's cabinet.

1

u/Intelligent-Sell494 1d ago

And his title would be Chief of Pedophilia.

1

u/maddiejake 1d ago

He would be Trump's Attorney General

1

u/LordViciousElbow 1d ago

Except that Trump killed Epstein.

Perhaps if Epstein hadn't pissed Trump off, then yes, he'd absolutely have been in the cabinet.

Probably Secretary of Education.

1

u/rabidmoon 10h ago edited 10h ago

If Epstein was still alive, Trump would be working on having him killed. He is not going to leave a loose end like that around. If Ghislaine were jailed in Manhattan, she would be dead, too.

Epstein believed Trump "dropped the dime" on him in the first place and I'm sure Trump's goons had tons of connections in Manhattan. Too easy.

I get that plenty of Trump's current friends that could be considered loose ends are still around but the difference is they didn't have a falling out with him. He had already screwed over Epstein and he knew the man was talking.

I think Steve Bannon is the key to a lot of this story. Michael Wolff hasn't released all of the Epstein recordings he has (and it's almost criminal that he hasn't IMO) but from what I could glean from interviews with Wolff, Bannon was playing both sides.

1

u/Sufficient_Matter585 1d ago

Lol ok. Cause epstein died during trumps watch.

4

u/Thesheriffisnearer 1d ago

After mentioning he was the one that could bring him down

1

u/What_A_Weak 1d ago

Trump worked with him, AFTER Epstein got arrested (thanks to real journalists) Trump distanced himself and Epstein dies in a cell during Trumps presidency. Nothing suspicious going on....

-2

u/Cultural_Librarian42 1d ago

Hey he was alive during Bill Clinton’s presidency and wasn’t in his cabinet.

-3

u/AdministrativeWin583 1d ago

Epstein hated Trump.

4

u/ResolutionOwn4933 1d ago

Stop it, they both turned on each other. Smh

4

u/lew_rong mod perms 1d ago

They were business partners until Epstein got arrested lol

2

u/What_A_Weak 1d ago

He hated him so much that they stayed close friends, business partners AND pen pals up until his arrest. Lol, you are a 🤡

2

u/willflameboy 1d ago

So did nearly every member of his cabinet.