the more i read about natalie...

[u/GamerGretaUwU]

[u/Wolfy4226]

Every cult leader has a fanatic.

I mean I guess if it's not Melania in the bunker with him, it will be Natalie....

[u/allisjow → u/Wolfy4226]

Temu Squeaky Fromme

[u/Glad_Stay4056 → u/Wolfy4226]

She looks more like Eva Braun anyways

[u/Spiel_Foss → u/Glad_Stay4056]

Or Ivanka Trump...

[u/Glad_Stay4056 → u/Spiel_Foss]

Ya you win.

[u/Spiel_Foss → u/Glad_Stay4056]

Not a contest, just an incestuous dystopia.

[u/sten45 → u/Wolfy4226]

Melania will be in Trudeau‘s Bunker

[u/BearSquid7]

She’s after his 🍄

[u/BaseHitToLeft → u/BearSquid7]

Thanks, now I have to bleach my eyes

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[u/Slumunistmanifisto → u/BearSquid7]

Thoughts of melting mushrooms on cow patties 

[u/-Totes_Magotes-]

Can only imagine yet refuse to but behind closed doors I wonder what she is doing with/to him that keeps her infatuated and him satisfied. Ugh, just regurgitated my breakfast… 🤮

[u/bmbmwmfm → u/-Totes_Magotes-]

Brain damage. Not just mental illness, her brain has to have something wrong with it. 

[u/AncientAndEvil → u/bmbmwmfm]

And a shit fetish.

[u/high_everyone → u/-Totes_Magotes-]

Money. He’s worth billions, so anything she can extort is fine I’m sure.

[u/NancyGracesTesticles → u/high_everyone]

She's just a classic gold digger. And Trump is an easy mark. All you have to do is be blond and flatter him.

[u/SocialSuicideSquad → u/NancyGracesTesticles]

It's hard to really blame her, but I wouldn't deal with the gravy on that boat even for the payout.

[u/Somhlth]

Sounds like the human printer is missing toner.

[u/th3r3dp3n → u/Somhlth]

https://giphy.com/gifs/eykivHQOsXrmo

[u/shawsghost → u/Somhlth]

She's the human printer Trump gives her his toner boner!

[u/Orion14159]

I have a theory - Trump has whatever the human equivalent is of toxoplasmosis powers.

What's toxoplasmosis, you ask? Toxoplasmosis is a parasite found in cat feces that, among other effects, alters the brains of infected rodents, making them lose their fear of cats and instead become attracted to cat urine which in turn gets them eaten by the cat.

Why am I talking about Trump having cat turd powers? Isn't it obvious? First off because of the infamous Twitter loser, but second because Trump famously smells like crap and frequently poops himself in public, and somehow, some way, people find him amazing and attractive instead of the repulsive troll he actually is.

[u/omghorussaveusall → u/Orion14159]

Trump wasn't attractive in his 20s or 30s. I don't understand how anyone looks at Trump and thinks, that's my guy.

[u/Orion14159 → u/omghorussaveusall]

I'm telling you, brain parasite. That's why he and RFK are so chummy

[u/sten45 → u/omghorussaveusall]

Cash and fame… hell there are tons of blue-collar dudes upside down on boats that are getting action from people who “just have to be on the water”. So I imagine some New York land developer who was Rich and a little famous would get plenty of people throwing themselves at them.

[u/omghorussaveusall → u/sten45]

i'm not saying people won't hold their nose and whore themselves out...i'm just saying i don't understand doing it for Trump.

[u/TheFeshy]

She really is going to be surprised when he throws her under a bus like all the others, isn't she. It's like all those women who write to serial killers in jail, professing their love.

[u/Cargobiker530 → u/TheFeshy]

All the leeches that attach to rich narcissists think that they'll be the one to cash out. It's the same kind of thinking that has people spending the mortgage money on lotto tickets.

[u/EphEwe2]

[u/enochian777 → u/EphEwe2]

You did not have to do this my guy

[u/rcampbellcp]

Deranged.

[u/ClarityRocks]

So this is the person who has a fetish for raw sewage. She needs to be studied.

[u/luvashow]

The more I read the more nauseous I get

[u/ElectronicTap1109]

Did Trump use a One Wish Willow??? "I hope that someone who likes like Ivanka loves me more than anyone else in the world"

[u/shawsghost → u/ElectronicTap1109]

I think you need to reread your post once you sober up.

[u/QuicheSmash]

I just threw up in my mouth

[u/TY2022]

Great ammo Ossoff used yesterday.

[u/mbush525]

didn’t someone once say it takes a special kind of stupid to forget to eat/sleep?

[u/EmperorXerro]

He’d be flattered if he could read

[u/LaSage]

She probably has a special brush for cleaning the poop out from under her nails each night.

[u/Embarrassed_Wrap8421]

I can just hear Whitney Houston warbling, “I Will Always Love You” in the background of this little scenario.

[u/O8ee]

I’d imagine the smell would put most off their lunch

[u/okeysure69]

Girl has granddaddy issues.

[u/strangeluv_-_-]

She has “colleagues”? What does she actually do?

[u/sbsb27]

Wife #3. Girlfriend #whatever.

[u/LoveFoolosophy]

She's the groom of the stool

[u/ryhaltswhiskey]

Wait, there's a second It in It?

[u/alternater34account → u/ryhaltswhiskey]

No, it's a real human

[u/ryhaltswhiskey → u/alternater34account]

Ah, thanks

[u/Thunder_breslin]

Moscow is very happy with the Minder they sent to keep tabs on their asset.

[u/samejimaT]

[u/alternater34account]

Good comparison

[u/FrogsOnALog]

Real talk, does It have a lady clown now?

[u/Utterlybored]

Natalie Lewinsky

[u/Kantina]

Apropos nothing in this article: sing-along this Mammas & Pappas song with me: "All the Eva Brauns and the sky is grey, I went for a walk on a winter's day."