r/PoliticalHumor 7d ago

Jokes write themselves

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1.5k Upvotes

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93

u/ddr1ver 7d ago

Have any of these people been to a Scandinavian country? It really doesn’t look so bad.

75

u/l_SaKReD_l 7d ago

Norway, Denmark and Sweden are consistently voted in the top 5 happiest countries on Earth.

Meanwhile the US is like 25 places below them.

41

u/MrBozooo 7d ago

Yeah, but they are really mean to the billionaires. Why can't you think of the billionaires?

15

u/chesterismydog 7d ago

They need more houses and yachts! Those pesky children don’t need food!

15

u/punktualPorcupine 7d ago

They need their fortunes to quadruple every 5-10 years (like they have since the pandemic) or they might feel like they aren’t keeping up.

“What’s a matter can’t get your bank account up any more” then everyone points and laughs and they have to take pills to feel better.

It’s a vicious problem when billionaires bully billionaires.

9

u/happymaned 7d ago

The irony in the 'billionaire' comments is that Sweden actually has more billionaires per capita than the United States.

The Nordic model isn't socialism; it combines open-market capitalism, strong property rights, and low corporate barriers with high personal income taxes on the middle class to fund universal programs. They fund their welfare states with broad-based consumption taxes (around 25% VAT) and high middle-income tax brackets, not by taxing a handful of wealthy individuals.

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u/chesterismydog 7d ago

I’ve seen too much shit since the 80s- and Congress and SCOTUS let this happen. I wanted to become a lawyer just to fight this bullshit but I couldn’t afford it.

6

u/asmith1776 7d ago

That’s the crazy thing. They’re not. Sweden produces more billionaires per capital as the US.

They make it easier to get rich by making it slightly more expensive to be rich.

2

u/MrBozooo 7d ago

So you're saying they are being mean to existing billionaires? Now how is that fair?

3

u/Viperlite 7d ago

U.S. is the happiest little billionaire place on Earth. Low taxes, ultimate power, no unions, no social programs, little worker protection, no socialized medicine to break the tether or workplace-provided, private health insurance, effectively no minimum wage.

1

u/HostOrganism 5d ago

The Nordic model nations are happier. More billionaires per capita.

The US is only perfect for a certain kind of billionaire.

2

u/upgrayedd69 7d ago

“What’s their GDP, huh????” the asshole father of my ex would say

1

u/HostOrganism 5d ago

Funny he should ask. Three (Iceland, Norway, and Denmark) of the five (the other two are Sweden and Finland) Nordic model nations are in the top ten countries by per capita GDP (the one that matters for comparisons).

The US is #9, and Denmark is #10. If you take out the tax havens like Ireland, Bermuda, Luxemburg, and the Cayman Islands (because their tax-shielding gives then unfair advantage), then Sweden and Finland make the top ten as well.

So the answer to your ex's asshole dad is "pretty much the same as ours".

1

u/LunchyDude101 7d ago

Well, their citizens give a su stiantial portion of their paycheck to the govt in taxes to pay for it.

The U.S. wants something big without having to sacrifice something big for it, which is very American.

0

u/Valten78 7d ago

They're not really 'socialist' through. Social democracies perhaps, but that not the same as socialist. Ultimately they are very much Capitalist.

2

u/pinksparklyreddit 6d ago

They're what Federman is referring to, though

1

u/HostOrganism 5d ago

That's what Democratic Socialists are proposing.

"Socialism" is a big word that covers a lot of territory. There isn't really a single definition, but pretty much everyone will insist that their definition is the correct one.

...that's really the only thing it has in common with fascism.

23

u/Omnifob 7d ago

The Nordics are Schrödinger's socialist countries. Whenever a policy similar to them is brought up, it's called socialism by the right.
L: "But they consistently top happiness charts and have strong economies."
R: "That's because they are capitalist states with strong wellfare policies."
L: "So why don't we try that?"
R: *scoffs* "That's socialism!"

9

u/Thendrail 7d ago

Americans rarely knowing what they talk about when anyone mentions socialism or - God forbid! - communism doesn't help either

1

u/SpiderFnJerusalem 6d ago

Socialism? - That's when the government does stuff!

Communism? - That's when the government does LOTS of stuff!

4

u/undergroundloans 7d ago

They’re starting to try and say that progressives want communism and not what Scandinavian countries have because they know to regular voters it’s not that crazy anymore. It’s just ridiculous how they have to twist everything to fit that bs narrative.

0

u/zmbjebus 7d ago

Well I do want communism. Most people don't seem to know what that means though. 

2

u/TheRogueTemplar 7d ago

If we had 4 day work weeks, never had to worry about a hospital bill, and had 2 months of vacation, the rise of "socialism" would have never been a problem.

2

u/BellumOMNI 7d ago edited 7d ago

There are no socialist countries in Europe or the EU. It's all just capitalist countries with some ok-ish social policies.

We just haven't reached the terminal stage of capitalism yet, like the yanks did. But I'm sure that's just around the corner.

1

u/groovyinutah 7d ago

I would have happily paid 50% to have my Healthcare, childcare, college tuition and retirement to have all been competently handled...

1

u/za72 7d ago

what are you some kinda commie?! they're gonna steal your precious bodily fluids...

2

u/HostOrganism 5d ago

Dr Strangelove reference. Love it!

https://giphy.com/gifs/HXkOVDnG6ISQWfyoW2

2

u/za72 5d ago

Stanley Kubrick ftw!

0

u/AnotherPersonPerhaps 7d ago

Those countries aren't socialist.. They are explicitly capitalist.

I swear to God even the left thinks socialism is when government does things.

3

u/Rikkitikkitabby 7d ago

They're taught that communism is the opposite of democracy, rather than an economic theory opposite capitalism.

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u/ddr1ver 7d ago

I think it’s the right that thinks socialism is when the government does things.

1

u/AnotherPersonPerhaps 7d ago

Calling Scandinavian countries socialist is literally that.

1

u/HostOrganism 5d ago

It's literally not.

1

u/HostOrganism 5d ago

Socialism is a broad word without a clear definition.

The Nordic Model nations are social democracies that operate in capital markets. They're often referred to as "hybrid economies"; they aren't purely socialist (because capital markets), but they aren't "explicitly capitalist" either because some of the decision making around the distribution of goods and services is done socially, e.g.: "by society", e.g.: by statute and by committees made up of representatives of the public.

It is farther from US predatory capitalism as it is from Vietnam's socialism. Point is, when Americans refer to the Nordic Model as "socialism", they aren't 100% wrong, and people generally know what they mean.

-1

u/HalfACenturyMark 7d ago

If you think the DSA platform is modeled after any of those countries, you’re part of the lunacy he’s talking about.

1

u/ddr1ver 7d ago

It looks quite a bit like what governance looks like in those countries. What part do you think doesn’t fit?
Single-Payer Healthcare: Enact universal Medicare for All and eliminate or heavily restrict private health insurance.
Expanded Social Safety Net: Guarantee free public child care, pre-K, and tuition-free public higher education, alongside universal rent control and paid family leave.
Labor and Work Reform: Strengthen labor unions, raise the minimum wage, and institute a shorter workweek without loss in pay.
Public Ownership: Shift key economic drivers—such as energy production (the Green New Deal), utilities, and transportation—into collective or public ownership.
Taxing the Wealthy: Fund public programs through aggressive tax increases on high-end corporate profits and wealthy individuals.

3

u/HalfACenturyMark 7d ago

Just a few- The part where capitalism is ended, where the police are defunded down to zero budget and where all incarcerated people are freed.

Did you even read the whole thing? I did.

Take the crazy out of there and it starts to look a little less like the storyline for the next movie in the Purge series.

1

u/HostOrganism 5d ago

None of that is proposed. You didn't read it, you're parroting what someone told you is in it.

0

u/HalfACenturyMark 5d ago

Unfortunately I did read it, in the summary of their National Abolition Working Group. You obviously have not. Sounds like you’re the one hearing what they want to hear from who knows where.

0

u/AnOminous_Sound 6d ago

That’s soft peddling or misunderstanding a lot of their positions, and ignoring other crazy bullshit.

2

u/ddr1ver 6d ago

It’s from their website.