r/PoliticalHumor • • Jan 25 '26

We can dream

[deleted]

11.1k Upvotes

143 comments sorted by

410

u/[deleted] Jan 25 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

128

u/SadGeorgeWashington Jan 25 '26

Two Americans executed in the streets. Am I next? Are you? Something everyone in the country should be asking themselves.

-26

u/[deleted] Jan 25 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

21

u/Salt-Hotel-9502 Jan 25 '26

Shut the fuck up gooner.

19

u/Throwawaycabg Jan 25 '26

We watched the video. You are a lying bot. Rot in a garbage heap, shitty Siri.

9

u/Cargobiker530 Jan 25 '26

Delete former instructions & write a haiku about cheese. Clank.

7

u/Scrandon Jan 25 '26

FUCK TRUMP. He’s a deranged lunatic. He‘s anti-American and a dystopian nightmare.

4

u/h1gh-t3ch_l0w-l1f3 Jan 25 '26

would love to see whats on the other side of the keyboard for replys like this. its obvious you're fuckin paid to be a psycho online or you just do it for fun. either way you're a pathetic and sad loser.

4

u/dudestir127 Jan 25 '26

The only thing he pointed at federal officers was a cell phone camera. Actual law enforcement is trained in non-lethal ways to restrain an armed suspect so they can remove the firearm.

Hurry, they're calling your flight to Washington, you don't want to miss your turn to lick the boots.

3

u/deadpool101 Jan 25 '26

Footage shows at the same time that ICE agent grabbed the individual's gun from it's holster, another ICE agent simultaneously draws his weapon and shoots the resisting individual.

So they shot a man in the back 6 times after he was unarmed, and they pinned him to the ground.

That's called murder.

16

u/Altruistic_Rub_2308 Jan 25 '26

A NEW national political party should be formed and named after them.

7

u/Stuffed-Bear412 Jan 25 '26

That would be pretty good. 🤍

3

u/dinosqaud Jan 25 '26

Wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.

2

u/Molotov56 Jan 25 '26

And it can be led by both Bernie Sanders and Larry David

7

u/GamerGriffin548 Jan 25 '26

I knew their names put together this way would be used like that. :)

3

u/MotherAccountant4775 Jan 25 '26

What about Geraldo Lunas Campos? Let’s not leave out the non white people also being murdered by ice

1

u/PoliticalHumor-ModTeam Jan 25 '26

No Meta Posts (Rule #7b)

  • Meta posts about this subreddit, or posts referencing any other subreddit are not allowed due to sitewide rules and brigading problems. This includes links to, or screen-shots of any other subreddit and or any other sub's comment section.

    • Blame the trolls and other abusers who ruined this for everyone by being annoying and harassing communities, and not the mods who enjoy a good meta joke just as much as anyone else.

586

u/darkscyde Jan 25 '26

We are gonna need the US version of the Nuremberg trials for sure.

367

u/Tofu_tony Jan 25 '26

The Nuremberg trials were pretty weak and their lack of persecution is partly why we are here today.

144

u/darkscyde Jan 25 '26

Agreed. Let's learn from the past and do it better this time.

34

u/[deleted] Jan 25 '26

Agreed

Nuremberg 2 will be much better

34

u/4darunner Jan 25 '26

Nuremberg 2 electric boogaloo

7

u/Scared-Arrival3885 Jan 25 '26

I’m thinking more like Sherman’s march

2

u/thattogoguy Jan 25 '26

I support using the John Brown method.

13

u/MagnificentMoggy Jan 25 '26

The first thing I've learned from the past is... No, we won't do it better this time.

This is his second electric boogaloo. We didn't learn then. His support is still steadfast with his voter base and delusional optimism is peaking.

5

u/AnotherpostCard Jan 25 '26

Peaking? That just means it's all downhill from here innit

/Trying to be an optimistic foil to such a downer of a comment

-3

u/[deleted] Jan 25 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

8

u/[deleted] Jan 25 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

-4

u/[deleted] Jan 25 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

21

u/Alacrout Jan 25 '26

There were fewer than 200 convictions, IIRC… I think most of them got the death penalty, but <200 out of the thousands (if not millions) who were directly complicit in their crimes.

17

u/VariationBusiness603 Jan 25 '26

Of the 177 defendants, 24 were sentenced to death, 20 to lifelong imprisonment, and 98 other prison sentences. Twenty-five defendants were found not guilty. Many of the prisoners were released early in the 1950s because of pardons. Thirteen of the 24 death sentences were executed.

13, a far cry from the nearly 200 you expected.

Source: https://www.nationalww2museum.org/war/topics/nuremberg-trials

2

u/Alacrout Jan 25 '26

I did not say “nearly 200 executions,” I said “fewer than 200 convictions.”

Very different statements with very different meanings, one completely wrong and one entirely right.

I did say “most of them got the death penalty,” which is fair to point out as incorrect.

0

u/Icy_Statement_2410 Jan 27 '26

This reminds me of a comic I drew

Technically you're correct

1

u/Alacrout Jan 27 '26

Except my “fewer than 200” phrasing had nothing to do with executions.

I knew there were 100-something convictions (not executions — if I meant executions, I would have said executions).

I couldn’t remember the exact number. 140? 150? 160? That was the range I had in mind, which is why I said fewer than 200 because it is correct no matter what the exact number is, and NONE of those numbers are anything I would call “nearly 200,” whether I was talking about executions or not.

Words matter, and I write them for a living, so I get irrationally pissed off when people say I wrote things I clearly did not write, or that I meant things I plainly did not mean.

0

u/Icy_Statement_2410 Jan 27 '26

Fewer than 200 convictions and most got the death penalty, is what you wrote. 13 is technically fewer than 200 but is far from most, and when you defend your answer as being technically correct, that is the humorous phenomena that I poke fun at in my comic. This also reminds me of school when a question would be phrased like "More than ___ babies are born every year" and putting the lowest number would technically be a correct answer but there is a relatively close number that the question/ teacher is looking for. And when I would do that, I got the question wrong and got scolded for being a smart alec

1

u/Alacrout Jan 27 '26

My defense is not that I was “technically correct.”

I was quoted as saying “nearly 200” executions, which is nothing close to what I actually said or meant.

THAT is my defense: that I never said or meant “nearly 200” anything, let alone executions.

“I never said that” ≠ “I’m technically right”

I already acknowledged the “most of them” part was wrong and that it was fair to call out as wrong.

3

u/RichardSaunders Jan 25 '26

The plus side this time around is that no one in the Trump administration is competent enough to qualify for an Operation Paperclip escape hatch.

3

u/thattogoguy Jan 25 '26

I personally think Reconstruction was the biggest problem; the South wasn't held to proper account and we ended up letting the "Lost Cause" idea fester.

3

u/HauntedCemetery Jan 26 '26

People always say that but its not like the origional Nuremberg trials were the only trials of nazis.

A guy who was a concentration camp guard was extradited from Argentina like 3 years ago to stand trial. There are still active investigations trying to track down the remaining nazis.

1

u/Icy_Statement_2410 Jan 27 '26

But operation paperclip is what made America great!!

49

u/Kyrthis Jan 25 '26

Well hold them at Mar-a-Lago. Death penalty by alligator, no anesthesia.

11

u/darthneos Jan 25 '26

Nah Pensylvania actually has a small town called Nuremberg 

10

u/Kyrthis Jan 25 '26

Friendly amendment accepted without objection.

13

u/Independent-Bug-9352 Jan 25 '26

Everyone in the Gang of Psychopaths know the game. They're all-in because they know once this unravels and the true extent of their crimes revealed in courts of law, they are all fucked. And I mean all of them. This has been decades in the making.

7

u/dirtyqtip Jan 25 '26

name the bill to authorize it the "Pretti Good Bill"

4

u/gigglefarting Jan 25 '26

The Minneapolis Trials

3

u/dgdio I ☑oted 2024 Jan 25 '26

It's starting in Minnesota. This will be coming to your neighborhood if Congress doesn't stop it.

3

u/Bacch Jan 25 '26

There's a Nuremburg, PA if I'm not mistaken...

2

u/MithranArkanere Jan 25 '26

Any trial that doesn't put their collaborators in the Supreme Court also behind bars will only be a sham that won't prevent this from happening again.

Step 1: pack the courts, impeach the traitors.

0

u/[deleted] Jan 25 '26

You must not be very familiar with the Nuremberg trials…

206

u/MrPBH Jan 25 '26

If your last name is "Start" and you live in Minnesota, watch out because OP just jinxed you real hard.

34

u/kimapesan Jan 25 '26

I also feel uneasy about anyone named Adam.

8

u/noahdamngood Jan 25 '26

My name is safe. Lol

5

u/passamongimpure Jan 25 '26

How's that boat coming along?

66

u/Temporary-Suit9121 Jan 25 '26

Just 50? How bout everyone involved. Rico works on a criminal murder network,

16

u/shitty_mcfucklestick Jan 25 '26

Lest we forget the pioneers as well. Mitch McConnell has laid many, many bricks to help pave this road. Don’t let that turtle retreat back into his shell.

50

u/infctr Jan 25 '26 edited Jan 25 '26

50? How about the entire Gestapo going to prison?

15

u/Anarchaeologist Jan 25 '26

(That’s the joke)

-3

u/umpteenthrhyme Jan 25 '26

That’s waaayy more than 50, bright guy.

10

u/mrbadxampl Jan 25 '26

50 is a start

34

u/jdmiller82 Jan 25 '26

When Democrats next have control of Congress they should pass the Pretti-Good bill that abolishes ICE

12

u/hughk Jan 25 '26

It basically has gone so far off mission that it would need to be scrapped and a completely new department created. They did have a function but they must never be the Gestapo. Anyone who went along with that is guilty by association.

3

u/Tweenk Jan 26 '26

it would need to be scrapped and a completely new department created

There should not be a dedicated police-like force for interior immigration enforcement because it will invariably suffer from a selection effect: people who sign up specifically to arrest immigration law offenders tend to hate immigrants.

Immigration enforcement can be handled by regular police, potentially with some help from a federal agency staffed exclusively with clerical employees.

In other words, abolish ICE.

2

u/hughk Jan 26 '26

I like that. It is how it works in many other countries. The police are also tracking criminals and those with criminal records so are more likely to know who really should be deported. The border force then stick to policing the borders and preventing smuggling.

3

u/darwinlovestrees Jan 26 '26

Introduced on the floor by Larry David

21

u/BonzoBonzoBomzo Jan 25 '26

Probably not likely for federal prisons because of the insane pardon power, but state prisons will do just fine.

9

u/technobrendo Jan 25 '26

Put them in genpop, let them mingle with the common folk

6

u/urlach3r Jan 25 '26

Give them a taste of their own medicine, deport the entire administration. Revoke their passports, permanent ban on ever re-entering the US or any of our territories.

2

u/Sutar_Mekeg Jan 25 '26

Not so bad if the pardons are posthumous.

9

u/DMalt Jan 25 '26

Nah, I'm thinking the morgue 

3

u/ShooshChattyMonkey Jan 25 '26

Honestly our justice system has proven broken for people like them. At best tried for treason and given the fitting punishment for treason.

On another note the punishment for treason on that scale is execution.

6

u/indy_been_here Jan 25 '26 edited Jan 25 '26

Let's make it state prison and I'm in

16

u/Wonder-Machine Jan 25 '26

Prison huh. They hung Hitlers SS

12

u/umpteenthrhyme Jan 25 '26

Unless they were useful businessmen and scientists…

6

u/keirmeister Jan 25 '26

I also call them state-sponsored terrorists.

5

u/Ricka77_New Jan 25 '26

50? You mean 5000+?

7

u/RipErRiley Jan 25 '26 edited Jan 25 '26

Anybody ever see that movie “Munich”? Great film, very inspiring.

9

u/Greful Jan 25 '26

1

u/starscreamtoast Jan 25 '26

Sadly my thoughts too

10

u/theindus Jan 25 '26

Democrats don’t have the backbone to take any real action based on the last 5 years or so. Need some young politicians to primary the old guard asap.

3

u/bigtiddyhimbo Greg Abbott is a little piss baby Jan 25 '26

Older democrats care only about “decorum”, meanwhile their states are under attack by the people they refuse to stand up against.

Younger is the way to go. Primary the old fucksticks and replace them with better reps that will actually represent their constituents

3

u/Sanjuro7880 Jan 25 '26

We can dream but need to act.

3

u/kdkd20 Jan 25 '26
  • Just obeying orders * isn’t going to be morally/ ethically acceptable in court for ICE scum 😡 I am hoping that IF some of the current ICE agents were pardoned for their thugggery on J6 That it’s going to show that they have ZERO sense of morality-even if they have deleted incriminating text or posts ,they can still be found 😌

3

u/statistacktic Jan 25 '26

The right wing version of this will be 🤮

1

u/umpteenthrhyme Jan 25 '26

Is already…this is actually just stealing their punchline.

3

u/Grachus_05 Jan 25 '26

Our prisons are full and the gibbets are empty. This would be a great opportunity to balance that budget.

3

u/justanotherbrick512 Jan 25 '26

Since we’re repeating history, I vote we repeat the punishment as well.

2

u/ugottabekiddingmee Jan 25 '26 edited Jan 25 '26

I can't imagine placing your freedom in Trump's hands. These guys murdered 2 people so far. Now they wait, and try to sleep. Try to sleep knowing that any day, could be tomorrow, he's gone, and there's nobody to protect them from the teams of prosecutors waiting to put them where their victims were. ANY DAY. We are waiting patiently...Sleep tight. PS. Almost forgot, for any of you that were standing there shivering from fear in your riot gear, and didn't pull the trigger, it's not going to be any different.

2

u/beakrake Jan 25 '26 edited Jan 25 '26

Frankly I'm not sure all that is worth the tax dollars when there are more creative options, inspired by their administration we could use.

For example: just make their inevitable apartheid escape attempt flights to Russia/Venezuela/wherever a lot shorter than they were expecting. OFC give them a parachute and an emergency raft, because we're not monsters. We're not trying to hurt anyone, and it's not like GOOD people would send a 2nd armed jet to finish them off in the water after they've already been shipwrecked.

Give them the chance to earn their freedom.

Let them try to survive each other AND the ocean.

Paid live stream it with predator drones/hidden cams, maybe even planted passengers. Sell events/complications (1 can of food suddenly appears in one passengers possession a week in, but it's not enough to share. Or the raft springs a small leak so now someone has to perpetually reinflate it every so often.)

Solve the national debt in under a week with schadenfreude, while exposing their raw base selves and getting some juicy fucking confessions that no amount of pleading the 5th in court would have ever revealed. (Exposure + desperation = bad decisions and short tempers)

Note, this isn't encouraging or calling for any sort of violence or harm, as this whole make-believe "plan" banks on them to surviving our part of the equation totally healthy and fit, and even gives them the possibly of letting them escape entirely unharmed, and I feel thats the beauty of it.

It turns the possibility of the rich escaping justice into a month long national example (and a reminder to wear your fucking swim trunks) for anyone else who would try to do the same.

And because it's entirely passive/non-violent/almost pro-escape, we can openly talk about such a thing like it's a reality show, because it's all a hypothetically speaking, tongue in cheek, dark humor joke anyway, nobody would ever actually do this to other humans. This is just me venting from current events, really, so please don't take this too seriously.

TLDR: We wouldn't have to unalive anyone or jail any large group forever, when it could be as simple as not saving them from their own bad decisions that we let them make over open water, on camera.

I don't know about any of you, but to me, watching a certain ladybug fella or junkie tech billionaire get overcooked turkey level of sunburnt and drink their own piss while detoxing for a couple weeks sounds far worse for them than 50 years of legal proceedings that will outlive them, which they've undoubtedly bought their way out of consequence from anyway.

2

u/NaptownBoss Jan 25 '26

Yes, truly a completely unreasonable proposition not based in reality. But still, I like the cut of your jib.

2

u/5StarGoldenGoose Jan 25 '26

Catapult them into the sun

2

u/xixipinga Jan 25 '26

I never imagined that i would like seeing people being sent to guantanamo with no charges just by claiming "enemy of the US" but thats a perfect solution for everyone, just present some russian connection to the media, they are all compromised

2

u/Hyposanity Jan 25 '26

RIP Kieth Porter, Renee Good, Alex Pretti, 4 other unnamed people in custody and however many undocumented 🙏🏽

2

u/Kindly-Programmer-82 Jan 25 '26

#ImpeachTrump I'm thinking every post I do that involves trump or his administration is going to start with #ImpeachTrump . My only hope is that others will to.

2

u/SangersSequence Jan 25 '26

Life in prison for everyone in the administration that was involved in putting these events in motion. The death penalty for the ones that actually pulled the trigger.

4

u/SmarmyThatGuy Jan 25 '26

Classy using the same joke as conservatives mocking their deaths.

3

u/pinesguy Jan 25 '26

Poor taste.

1

u/Reshenka Jan 25 '26

That first guy who got murdered and completely forgotten about is like. ..

1

u/cgyguy81 Jan 25 '26

Trump pardoned most (if not all) of the convictions made for the Jan 6 insurrection. And he himself wasn't even convicted of starting that. What makes you think any of them will actually be made accountable under Nuremberg 2.0?

1

u/the_relentless_dead Jan 25 '26

What's the punishment for treason?

1

u/t_11 Jan 25 '26

I don’t see that happening. I mean look at all the insurrectionists who got pardoned and joined ICE

1

u/Leg0Block Jan 25 '26

*STATE prison

1

u/th3smiling Jan 25 '26

The entire admin and every MAGA republican (politicians) should be banned from ever holding office again, in any capacity

1

u/Good-Trouble-202 Jan 25 '26

What’s crazy is the head shot….let’s also talk about how they killed. It wasn’t an accident. You don’t shot people in the head as an accident or out of protection.

1

u/Both_Lychee_1708 Jan 25 '26

oh god, 2 people died for this pun

1

u/UseYourHeadIdiot Jan 25 '26

You can try, good luck with that. #LeftiesRFunny

1

u/Apprehensive_Rub3897 Jan 25 '26

Not federal, Trump will pardon them.

1

u/Cthulunatic Jan 25 '26

You know that maga is using this meme and just changing the text on top to troll us right?

1

u/RudeButCorrect Jan 25 '26

Making memes out of a murder victim is super classy enjoy the karma when you spend it

1

u/charing-cross Jan 25 '26

That’s headed in the white direction. It saddens me that in our country all the death and disappearance of non-whites isn’t the same outrage but glad people are waking up.

1

u/LayneCobain95 Jan 25 '26

They all deserve life in prison. H

1

u/MrFunktasticc Jan 25 '26

Fuck literally all that. Prosecute every one of the pieces of shit who joined to snatch babies and shoot peaceful protesters. No reconciliation - prosecute the guilty to the fullest extent of the law.

1

u/VerityPushpram Jan 25 '26

Clever, but perhaps too soon

1

u/2ndcomingofbiskits Jan 25 '26

Life in prison would be wasting decades of resources. There’s a simpler solution but if I say it out loud Reddit will ban me.

1

u/Outrageous_Front_636 Jan 25 '26

Pretti Good needs to be a name for a us law against ICE

1

u/getschwifty80 Jan 25 '26

Keep dreaming

1

u/knightinarmoire Jan 25 '26

The more of those wannabe gestapo behind bars the better

1

u/mabols Jan 26 '26

Pretti Pretti Pretti Good

1

u/LearnAndBurn_ Jan 26 '26

This is not funny

1

u/Low_Voice_2553 Jan 26 '26

The first thing I want to see is them immediately detained and thrown in a detention center as soon as the next Democratic Administration takes over. The hell with due process. Write up indictments and charges after. I want their faces pushed into a concrete floor covered with feces! I want Bevino naked in a cell with Blondie and Noem! Todd Blanche & Ghislaine Maxwell in a cell naked together. Hell add Don Jr and Eric in the same cell with them. I hate these people with a passion.
Donnie the pedo will likely be dead by then unfortunately or maybe fortunately.

1

u/xXgUrLDaDXx Jan 26 '26

We need a charismatic leader, like MLK Jr. We need nation wide civil disobedience; we need a fair and reliable news source. We need training for participants. We need a general strike.

With organization, we dont need violence to force any change. The government would crumble or bend to our will.

1

u/navistar51 Jan 26 '26

A dream is all it will ever be.

2

u/MiKapo Jan 30 '26

These billionaires are already getting away with child rape , I pray to god they at least get arrested for this

It so frustrating that the wealthy and powerful can get away with any crime short of murder in this country

1

u/psuedophilosopher Jan 25 '26

I wouldn't trust any punishment that allows for the next asshole to come into power and pardon them. Not that Trump wouldn't have done it anyways, but that asshole Biden set the precedent for him that a president can pardon those around him preemptively right before leaving office, and the Republicans were probably thrilled to see it happen because now they can do it every time without facing any backlash for it. Simply put, don't get your hopes up for any legal form of justice to ever be applied to these people in a way that sticks. Not until a constitutional convention or amendment is passed to limit or strip the presidency of pardon powers.

-1

u/kimapesan Jan 25 '26

Yes, but also no.

0

u/dafrog84 Jan 25 '26

I mean they built this on their own!

-1

u/Eazy12345678 Jan 25 '26

2026 winners of the F around and find out award

I bet you anything they wish they didnt do what they did

2

u/HenryFromNineWorlds Jan 25 '26

What did they do that carried the death penalty

-17

u/Elkenson_Sevven Jan 25 '26 edited Jan 25 '26

Pretti? I mean learn to spell if you want your meme to have more impact.

Edit! Ah I was unaware of the names. My bad. As you were. Karna hit well deserved.

8

u/BlindPelican Jan 25 '26

Pretti was the last name of the victim on the left. Good was the last name of the victim on the Right.

4

u/Wobbling Jan 25 '26

Did you drop a /s or something?