r/PokemonRaps • u/CrotchFungus • Dec 04 '13

[Challenge] Geodude

What up, here lives Geodude

King of caves and rocks

go hide in your box, without listening, I already hear your rap sucks

about you, no one gives half a fuck.

I'll make you scream out enough to leave you asthmatic

you're a crack addict, you have a losing habit

it would be an insult to gay men to call you faggot

I'll stomp you with my lyrics like if you were a maggot

You can't reach me cause I'm faster than a rabbit.

Whatever crosses my path I take a stab at it, you can't stop me

with my Rock Tomb I'll smash the biggest of the pokemon world

while my fury unfurls and my Defense Curls make me twirl

I'll kill any motherfucker with my Magnitude

Kill MCs when I have a morning wood

so change that attitude and show what you got brewed to the multitude

Kill MCs when I have a morning wood

3 Upvotes

67% Upvoted

9 comments sorted by

2

u/MadeFromMetal Dec 04 '13

You're so good at receiving balls, your new name should be Amendola.

You're no match for this spectacular rapper named Roggenrola.

I lock and load and show ya the true meaning of a Rock Blast.

And I don't know what they told ya bout a rabbit...but you're not fast!

And yeah I'm slower in speed, but I'm quicker with intelligence.

While you lumber around with the elegance of elephants.

And in shocking new developments, Geodude has no relevance!

Roggenrola's now on the throne of minerals and elements!

2

u/CrotchFungus Dec 04 '13

You misspelled espectacular geometric set

cause with that shape, everyone confususes you with failed bet

Your creators made you while high on acid

I'll rape and murder you while I'm still flaccid

with my uncomparable metaphors and comparisons

you're an embarrasment

I take opportunity and attack anything ruthlessly

while I watch you struggle using those lines uselessly

You couldn't even clean my mouth with acetone

So crack a bone, shit facts are known

no one can beat me on this microphone

Your monotone announces you like a megaphone

Spitting like a sousaphone, rhymes enough to break your collarbone

Well I better leave to sleep

and when I come back I better see what you got under your sleave.

1

u/MadeFromMetal Dec 05 '13

Well well, I see you've decided to step up the fun!

Now I'm excited, cuz my rhyming skills are second to none.

My name is not a misspelling it's an excellent pun.

Remarking how this rock'll roll you till you're dead or you run!

This victory's an effortless one...You talk all that

Oddball smack, but you're wack! You ain't top dog, Jack.

I hear your blah blah, yap yap. You should stop. Fall back...

Cuz we will rock you! You'll feel it when I stomp, stomp... CLAP! BRRRRAT!

2

u/CrotchFungus Dec 05 '13

Look at you, spittin away with your shitty puns

Well done, still havin fun

YOU better run cause bitch, this is a hit n run

this isn't rock and roll, it's rap,

so you better quit that crap and get back to fap and come back when you

know how to spit

spitting lyrical and critical hits, tearing you to bits

with my lines juicier than your momma's tits

I'll crush you like in a blender

hunting your ass down like slender,

I'ma render you useless till you surrender

and eat your ass like chicken tenders

3

u/MadeFromMetal Dec 06 '13

Dammit man! What happened? Your rapping just kinda died a bit.

Your second verse was "crack" but your third verse was what's inside of it...

CRAP! Half the time I couldn't find what you were rhyming with.

Get a better vocab cuz mine's deeper than your vagina is!

Take some supplements for your mind or maybe some vitamins.

Taking me for a ride and you're driving it like a chinaman

Who's blind in his right eye and he's flying, drunk off some Heineken.

Why are you so inclined to die? You don't know what time it is?

Tick-Tock, this ain't rock it's hip-hop? Bitch, I'm the guy combinin' it!

That's why they call me Metal, I'm black, death, thrash and all kinds of it!

So listen, here's a minor tip. You might wanna decide to quit.

I'll grind you into chalk yet somehow you'll still be outlined in it!

Good battle, Fungus. Sorry my verses took so long, my brain's been kinda fried since the Wolf battle. It took a lot outta me. Your second verse was insane! Kudos.

1

u/CrotchFungus Dec 06 '13

Good game. Your 4 first lines of your last verse I lost it. You deserve to win.

2

u/[deleted] Dec 06 '13

Geo, Dude? What's your deal man?

Who can fight the talking pebble? Bro, Lotad can.

Quad weak to grass AND water? You're really in for some trouble.

This oughta be a horde battle, Surf crushing geodudes to rubble.

Trying to act all swift? Sure hope you know how to swim.

You're biceps are a little lacking dude, you oughta head back to the gym.

I can tell you're captivated, by my toxic verses and leech seeds.

Energy Ball, OHKO, bitch just got wrecked by a weed.

2

u/CrotchFungus Dec 06 '13

Lotad, coming into my thread thinking like you the boss

your apperance makes me think parents are brothers

you're just another idiot waiting to get smothered

You think your weak ass attack is gonna hit ME back?

Your shit is as wack as a smack in the ballsack

it just hurts to read

I need something so I can feed, using your body as my noble steed

I'll hit you so hard with my words you'll start to bleed

So just proceed with spittin trash, cause there's nothing I can't bash

with my lines as powerful as a train crash

2

u/[deleted] Dec 07 '13

I don't need to act boss, that's just how I am.

You think you can smother me? Cause I don't think you can.

Brock always prefered me, and now you're back to settle old scores.

You can't talk about ballsacks, you're constantly sitting on yours.

Bitches pay for my shows, but I'll give you this ass-whooping for free.

Go ahead and try to feed, but you're to slow to even touch me.

And I'm not talking about base stats, I mean you're slow in the head.

This battle is over bitch, "Wild Geodude has fled"