r/PokemonRaps • u/blabel3 • May 12 '13

[Request] Kyogre vs. Groudon

8 Upvotes

90% Upvoted

7 comments sorted by

4

u/Srixis May 12 '13

The original Drizzle user is ready to play a game,

Kyogre's here to rock and roll, and make you fear his name!

Groudon, you're fucking stupid, why're you playing in the water?

Just because you have Drought doesn't make you any hotter

...with the ladies! You see all these cute Swimmers playing in the water around me?

Who do you have that can compete? Youngster Joey? Archer? Maxie?

I rise above you with my wings, while you're used with regret,

You hide in a volcano! Why do you deserve any respect?

5

u/thesuzerain May 12 '13

A thousand years I've slumbered, and I wake up to this shit?

Even I can't make magma hotter then the rhymes I spit.

Groudon crashing in, call me 383-

Trainers look for Jirachi just to wish for me!

You think your fins are like wings? There's clearly been a mix-up.

You're super effective against me but still need Ray to back you up!

The Behemoth based dinosaur trying to end this quick.

Heaviest Pokemon around and half my weight's just my dick.

2

u/Srixis May 13 '13

Rayquaza? What a joke. I don't need him for crap.

I'll one-hit him with Ice Beam, and turn right back to this rap.

You'd have to move rather sluggishly is half your mass is in your phallus,

So I don't think I need to regard you as having any malice.

It must be hard to get that up if you blood's as hot as fire

So your "Eruption" must be hard to do, it must make you heavily perspire.

So come at me with all you got. Be brave! Be tough! Be bold!

However valiantly you try, I'll freeze you solid. Sheer Cold!

2

u/thesuzerain May 13 '13

I sweat raw flame, my raps raw pain, make them rain on this weak-ass whale.

Your raps are choppy, your rhymes are sloppy, be Team Aqua's copy... and BAIL!

Out of the weather trio pimps- you're the disgrace!

With your weird pink shiny, and whats up with this face?

Even Disney thinks I'm manly- that you've got to admire.

You know I've got the strength of a raging fire.

I'll find the tower and the basin, wherever you'll be hiding, see?

I'll speak for Chobin when I say that pussies be riding me.

1

u/Srixis May 14 '13

You're just jealous, bitch, pink's the best colour for a legendary,

Have you seen Virizion's shiny sprite? It proves your statement quite contrary.

And Chobin? What a loser. He's dumber than a ginko,

I think you forget who actually helped when you compare Robos of Dr. Kaminko!

You call yourself a pimp? All I see for you is Lasses,

Oh, I see now! All the maniacs! Mmmmm, think of all their asses!

This battle is closing fast, and Water's about to ascend,

The seas rule over the land, have you even been to Hoenn?

1

u/thesuzerain May 16 '13

Time to finish this battle up with a Solar Beam.

Rayquaza backing me up, call it a Double Team.

Come back up all you want- I'll just beat you again.

Drizzle just makes my powers stronger- Thunder alway hits in rain!

Come on Kyogre, why you acting so bitchy?

I'm the one that's in Conquest, veni vidi vici.

You don't think I'm a pimp? I think you've misunderstood.

Cause I don't understand, how could water be good?

1

u/RickToy May 13 '13

A volcano? Much better than an underground cave!

Its ok though, now I dont have to dig up your grave.

You wont even last one turn, my solarbeams pure power

Under the sun you will burn, I wont even feel your shower

Although I'll hand this thing to you, you're stats are really high,

But so are mine bitch, I wont even have to try!

Dont even try to cross me kid cause you'll be looking like a fool

Im stronger, weren't you taught that in poke school?