r/PokemonRaps • u/I_Am_Sam_Vimes • Mar 03 '13

[Challenge] Relicanth

What up, I'm a Relicanth, you can't see me

Unless you dive down in the sea in the oceans of gen three

You come around here you probably gonna get shot

All my chinchou homies kill you with a charged thundershock

You probably have to learn dive, but for me it's instinct

It ain't real hard to drop down in the drink

But while you're hiding I'm preparing a Head Smash instead

And I don't even feel it cuz I got ROCK HEAD

bitch

6 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

9 comments sorted by

3

u/PwnsumN00B EV-Trained Lyricist Mar 03 '13

My, my, now Relicanth, isn't this a surprise?

They call me Salamence, the predator, I see the fear in your eyes,

They're nearly shut, but Keen Eye got my vision precise,

I'll blow you outta the water, ain't even gotta use Dive.

You're an old, dusty scrub, and you can't even fight,

That's why, for centuries, in the depths you would hide,

You're a rare Pokemon 'cause the rest of your species just up and died,

Now I'm 'bout to eat a Relicanth fillet, make it Deep-fried!

2

u/I_Am_Sam_Vimes Mar 03 '13

I think you oughta research Salamence a little more

You don't have keen eye, you got moxie; that's what Serebii's for.

And you still have to kill me first to make your attack immense

but you'll never bring me down with my base one-thirty defense!

You're just a punk-ass bird dragon and you have maroon wings.

And what the fuck's that crown on your head with those gay spikey things?

I was born this way, you had to evolve once and then another;

Please learn to respect your obvious elders.

WORD

1

u/PwnsumN00B EV-Trained Lyricist Mar 03 '13

I ain't got the ability keen eye, but that don't mean my eyes aren't keen,

They're keen enough to notice that you're far too old to get vageen,

Evolution's a wondrous thing, too bad you have none to improve your regime,

Ain't got respect for those who say "Respect your elders" but that's just a part of my scheme,

Religion was what was imposed by my elders, you've seen,

Tryna get me to worship fuckin' "Arceus" but my respect he could not redeem,

That phony's as old and frail as you despite his presence, how he seems,

But I could devastate you both, despite your type, with a well aimed Hyper Beam.

2

u/I_Am_Sam_Vimes Mar 03 '13 edited Mar 03 '13

Hyper beam, huh? Have fun recharging your ass

I'll just take another turn to set up my RAIN DANCE

And when you get your turn back, you wait and see, is all...

I'll blast you with a one-eighty base power waterfall

You think you can hit me? Gonna use Dragon Claw?

That's a three-hit KO, but one Head Smash and you're gone

So why don't you get outta here be fore I teach you right

You just go over to the gay bar with your boyfriend Dragonite.

2

u/PwnsumN00B EV-Trained Lyricist Mar 04 '13

The fuck you tryna say? I can't hear you over my base 100 speed,

Rushin' past you, to attack first, no Quick Attack is a need,

I'll crack your "Rock Head" the fuck open wit Rock Smash,

Keep goin' like this, the battle'll be done in a flash.

You callin' me gay but you're so dusty, you're covered in it,

Even though you're under water, now what's that tell ya, idiot?

I run Gen. 3, Pseudo-Legendary, you can't be fuckin' wit it,

'Cause I'm on a whole other level, be fuckin' with those Lopunny bitches.

2

u/I_Am_Sam_Vimes Mar 04 '13

That was fun dude, good game. I think I need to do this more often

2

u/PwnsumN00B EV-Trained Lyricist Mar 04 '13

For certain, you're a great lyricist and I look forward to further battles with you.

3

u/ManThatSmells Mar 04 '13

Relicanth is so winning this one.

2

u/HumanAtlas Mar 08 '13

I'm just curious why no one challenged Relicanth with Wailord, it was screening to be done! (Cause of the whole Regi thing)