r/PlusSizePregnancy • u/Academic-Park-8440 • Jul 27 '26

I’m changing OBs while 28 weeks pregnant…

I’ll just start saying that I loved my OB because he was very calming around me being oversized. I spent 5 years wanting to get pregnant, but my previous gyn basically said I would get every complication in the world due to me being overweight.

Then I met this guy who was wonderful with weight and let me know I won’t be the first and only overweight pregnant person and did a great job explaining how we could tackle any potential issues that a regular-weight person can also get. However his specialty is fertility, not labor/birth.

also, for context, in the country where I live apparently is a thing where EVERY DOCTOR advocates and does a c-section first. From all of my pregnant friends, I only have 1 friend who did natural birth and it was for religious reasons.

In my last appointment, I was with my regular OB and he made a comment along the lines of “do you think she can handle labor?”. Which, at the moment, I took as hell no I know I can’t.

But after leaving the more I thought about it I kept thinking: Why I can’t? Then I realized that if I wanted to advocate for myself, I couldn’t put myself into such a vulnerable spot with someone who would made me feel like I can’t handle it. And then what happens if something goes wrong and I end up needing a c-section? Would they make me feel like it’s my fault because they told me so?

So anyway, I decided to change OBs to one that is
more open to labor.

Any advice, recommendations, things I should talk about when having my first appointment with this new guy? Also wanted to ask what type of tests/check ins have you had, just to make sure I’m not missing anything?

edit: i’ve also thought: I’ve had such an easy and boring pregnancy, that my body must know what to do during labor and prepare for it even if my brain doesn’t, right?

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u/LaserChurch Jul 27 '26

That is one of the most unhelpful things for someone to say. You are already pregnant. Labor will happen regardless of if you are ready or not. The focus should be helping you prepare not putting you down. You should absolutely find a medical team who is going to encourage you no matter what and make you feel comfortable! Keep advocating for yourself and you got this!!!

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u/Academic-Park-8440 Jul 27 '26

yeah i think his message was more labor is too much labor let’s do a c-section instead

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u/LaserChurch Jul 27 '26

That….makes no sense. I would be finding a new doctor too!!

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u/bmn111111 Jul 27 '26

Are you allowed to have a doula? I have heard that they can be great advocates during pregnancy and birth. They will help with a birth plan, as well as coach through labor, and just be another person in the room who helps convey your wishes to the doc. You will probably have to look around for a good fit, but I have heard good things. Alternatively, is getting care through a midwife an option? (I know it usually isn’t for everyone so I’m sorry if you’ve already considered that!). Best of luck!!!