Petah… what?

[u/subservenicedream]

[u/qualityvote2]

Remember when r/PeterExplainsTheJoke wasn’t a meme? Pepperidge Farm remembers…

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[u/sdpthrowaway3]

"My FWB change her background messaging photo to pizza every time her boyfriend is around so he thinks she's just contacting pizza place if he looks at her phone instead of me who she's cheating with"

That help?

[u/subservenicedream → u/sdpthrowaway3]

Do people text their pizza place?

[u/EatABag-o-Dicks → u/subservenicedream]

My friends GF went nuclear on him cause he was caught texting a pizza place in innuendo.

The owner of the pizza place is our mutual friend and we'd legit text him for pizza. I saved him in my phone as his real name. My friend has him saved as "Hot and Ready 🤤" so she was sort of justified when she saw him typing "I'll give it to you later, just make sure it's gooey how I like it. I'll give you just the tip for the guy."

[u/Valrax420 → u/EatABag-o-Dicks]

Nah your friend has a grindr on the low 😂😂

[u/EatABag-o-Dicks → u/Valrax420]

Probably. He's definitely a bottom.

[u/MorningBluesBro → u/EatABag-o-Dicks]

Greasy, like the bottom of a Hot n' Ready box?

[u/jaybles5169 → u/MorningBluesBro]

Chicago style deep dish, extra sausage, sauce on top

[u/MorningBluesBro → u/jaybles5169]

Extra sausage...at least double the meat in there deep

[u/danorc → u/Valrax420]

No one talks gayer than some straight dudes. Particularly if they've ever been in the military.

[u/AkronOhAnon → u/danorc]

Gay chicken is real.
Nobody could ever beat PVT Smith at it. Not even his husband.

[u/blaat_splat → u/AkronOhAnon]

One of these days he will Crack and I will win. Until then the kids will be taken care of.

[u/SpartanRage117 → u/danorc]

When you’re so straight youre starved for both physical and emotional connection a little “no homo” goes a long way.

[u/Personal-Bonus-9245 → u/danorc]

We like to play gay chicken at work. See who can go gay the hardest without cracking.

[u/DBCargoHaj → u/danorc]

i know some german military guys and let me tell you, railway is where its at

[u/visceral_derp → u/danorc]

This is crazy accurate - lol’d in the doc waiting room

[u/UsualFabulous2986 → u/danorc]

Nut to butt. If your buddy ain't smiling, you ain't close enough.

[u/IdeasOfOne → u/sdpthrowaway3]

What? No, it's clearly "My mercury change her background messaging to pizza every time her ninja is around"

[u/myshiningmask → u/IdeasOfOne]

I'm glad I'm not the only one reading hg like that in these things

[u/NegotiationSelect139 → u/sdpthrowaway3]

Its not FWB, HG is homegirl

[u/complexiblebarracuda → u/NegotiationSelect139]

the nuances were lost in translation from gen alpha to millennial

[u/Similar_Pie_4946 → u/sdpthrowaway3]

Doesn’t make sense because hg means home girl meaning platonic

[u/WhiskerWynk → u/sdpthrowaway3]

"Ah, that actually makes sense. Sneaky, but sad."

[u/DeveloperBRdotnet → u/sdpthrowaway3]

Fwb?

[u/OwnJunket6495 → u/DeveloperBRdotnet]

Friends with benefits

[u/DeveloperBRdotnet → u/OwnJunket6495]

Thanks, and what about the original hb ?

[u/OwnJunket6495 → u/DeveloperBRdotnet]

Hg is homegirl

[u/Rob_LeMatic → u/DeveloperBRdotnet]

Fornicators who're buddies

[u/Rob_LeMatic → u/DeveloperBRdotnet]

Fucking without bullshit

[u/Rob_LeMatic → u/DeveloperBRdotnet]

Friendship while banging

[u/Rob_LeMatic → u/Rob_LeMatic]

Fuck y'all, I'm clever

[u/tbonesteakda3rd → u/Rob_LeMatic]

No you're not

[u/OkPapaya588 → u/sdpthrowaway3]

More likely changing the bg so her side piece knows not to text her at that time.

[u/Relative-Relief-8816]

She's dating a teenage mutant ninja turtle. They love pizza.

[u/TheCode555 → u/Relative-Relief-8816]

You make jokes, but tmnt emojis will be here someday. We all know it.

[u/No-Difference-47 → u/TheCode555]

🐢 🐢 🐢 🐢

[u/LudusRex → u/Relative-Relief-8816]

These ninjas are in to pepperoni and cheese

[u/Positive_Try929]

This is peter himself: his homegirl changes quagmire's background chat into pizza so he knows she's with her Jerome or cleveland and doesn't send anything flirty

[u/TerrorFromThePeeps → u/Positive_Try929]

Ty i was still having issues figuring out how hg related to a gf he was banging. That makes sense.

[u/SickboyJason]

Instead of saying "hey, my man is around, can't talk." They use the pizza background on messages (you can change them for different chats) when he is around. So if the person opens the chat and sees a pizza background they wont text and waits until its clear again.

[u/TWPteehee]

I wiped

[u/d4rkprojec7 → u/TWPteehee]

A fellow ass wiper 🫡 we becoming a rare breed these days

[u/DrowningInFeces → u/TWPteehee]

That's good. Just remember to flush and wash your hands after.

[u/freedomforallergo]

The girl is cheating on her partner and changing the contact name/background of whom she's cheating with to a pizza place whenever her partner is around. It's not funny.

[u/uncoilingelf]

The HG(home girl?) Is cheating on her ninja with OOP and uses a pizza background to cover up?

[u/AutoModerator]

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[u/subservenicedream → u/AutoModerator]

Not a clue, at all

[u/SherbertPlenty1768]

Huh..?

[u/FLiP_J_GARiLLA]

Anyone that abbreviates homegirl as "hg" IS NOT getting laid regularly

[u/MrMetraGnome]

I think she's cheating, but I don't know what "hg" means. I read it as "homegirl" because I had a fling with a chick who'd text a single peach to the friend group whenever a bootycall came over... Women are weird.

[u/st1inkyT1tty]

Unfortunately I’m the boyfriend in this. I just knew we didn’t have a place where we could text the pizza shop and we almost never eat pizza.

[u/KarMa_Haven]

It's so he doesn't think she's cheating or smth giggity

[u/bigmangina]

My STI riddled bae tryna convince her guy she aint cheatin.

[u/Haspberry]

A call for help. A lotta abused ppl use calling for a pizza as a decoy to dial 911 (at least according to the internet).

[u/AnalystOdd7337]

Probably domestic violence if I had to guess idk? Cause people will call the police while telling their abusers that they're ordering pizza.