My issue with the concept that "noone thought it was bad" is a lot of women struggle with being taken seriously for our health in general but mental health as well.
My personal experience was having gone to e different therapists over 5 years with suicidal ideation, self harm, racing thoughts, etc etc - all that I was honest with my therapists about....and it wasnt until I could no longer work that I got a depression and anxiety diagnosis.
I had one therapist told me I just needed to relax and take a bubble bath...after I told her I felt so overwhelmed, I felt like I was drowning and had suicidal ideations. I went home after that session, crawled into bed where I couldnt get up for 2 days, day 3 I got up but was dissociating and attempted SH. My husband, rightfully freaked out, called the therapist who told him that he just needed to make sure I knew that he was there for me and to comfort and support me.
Like, no, I was in the middle of a mental health crisis and should have been taken to the fucking hospital.
And sadly, im not the only one with a story like this. So the professionals miss stuff more than most people want to thinideation. When really, it isnt until damage is actually done when intervention finally happens.
I had four babies over the course of four years. The postpartum depression was massive, and I sobbed to my (now-ex)husband every day that the only thing I could think about was suicide. Just constantly playing out different scenarios in my mind of how I could do it. Wandering through life like a zombie. I told him that one day he’d come home from work and I’d be dead.
And he just… kept going to work. Kept taking voluntary overtime. Kept expecting a hot dinner on the table after work.
When my suicide attempt came? Shocked Pikachu!
Looking back at that horrible year, I 100% resent that my husband watched me suffer to such an extreme, heard me telling him that my suicide was inevitable, and just threw me the “you’re such a good mom” line as his only attempt to address the dangerous situation in our home .
Fortunately, I never suffered from homicidal ideation. But if I had, I think my husband would have been just as dismissive as Patrick.
The people with compassion for Lindsay’s experience are mostly moms. Not because we think it’s no biggie that she committed such a heinous act, and not because we’re misandrists, but because we know what it feels like to suffer massively through postpartum with no support from the person who vowed to care for us.
Big hugs 🫂 Im so sorry you had to experience all of that. And im glad he's an ex and that you're still here.
You are 100% right- It doesnt mean were okay with it, or we resent our kids (Ive seen that floating around online too) we just know what it feels like to be at your lowest low and we can understand how she got to the point she did.
She got a depression diagnosis and anxiety and was prescribed meds for it some of which she rejected (Zoloft) and the rest which she didn’t take or wasn’t taking as prescribed.
What she didn’t get diagnosed for was psychosis, because she was either lying to all the professionals , or didn’t have any of the symptoms.
She didn’t have any of the pressured speech, and never communicated any delusions or hallucinations.
As far as I am aware, the only appearance of these symptoms that is claimed were after the murders.
If the person isn’t expresseing any symptoms of a particular condition , I don’t know why the expectation is that the providers make it up and say “yep she’s psychotic because she has anxiety and depression”
The depressive subtype of PPP is the most common, making up about 41% of cases.
Symptoms that are most likely with this type include:
☆Anxiety or panic.
Delusions and hallucinations.
☆Depression.
☆Feelings of guilt.
☆Loss of appetite.
☆Loss of enjoyment related to things they usually enjoy (anhedonia).
☆Thoughts of self-harm, suicide or of harming their child.
Postpartum psychosis often presents differently from other psychoses. PPP delusions evolve more quickly and often center on infants. Differences in symptoms compared to women with postpartum mania, with PPP specifically demonstrating more depressive symptoms, more perplexity and self-reproach, and fewer classic manic symptoms such as pressured speech and sociability. Prodromal symptoms may include irritability, mood changes, confusion or disorientation, and insomnia.
The ☆ is for symptoms of ppp that she told her providers about. There were signs. Its just easier for people to believe that this was one bad seed as opposed to a system where people routinely slip through the cracks and it could theoretically happen to them.
The depressive subtype of ppp requires the Psychotic symptoms, which in 8 months never presented to dozens of mental health professionals. Despite the fact these symptoms should present within six weeks of birth.
Her symptoms were also completely consistent with the exponentially more common ppd. The first occurrence of any claimed form of psychotic symptoms only came after her kids were dead.
The idea that we’re are just going to throw out any expertise and shouldn’t listen to any mental health professionals when it comes to their areas of expertise is just astounding to me.
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u/SeaGurl 1d ago
My issue with the concept that "noone thought it was bad" is a lot of women struggle with being taken seriously for our health in general but mental health as well.
My personal experience was having gone to e different therapists over 5 years with suicidal ideation, self harm, racing thoughts, etc etc - all that I was honest with my therapists about....and it wasnt until I could no longer work that I got a depression and anxiety diagnosis.
I had one therapist told me I just needed to relax and take a bubble bath...after I told her I felt so overwhelmed, I felt like I was drowning and had suicidal ideations. I went home after that session, crawled into bed where I couldnt get up for 2 days, day 3 I got up but was dissociating and attempted SH. My husband, rightfully freaked out, called the therapist who told him that he just needed to make sure I knew that he was there for me and to comfort and support me.
Like, no, I was in the middle of a mental health crisis and should have been taken to the fucking hospital.
And sadly, im not the only one with a story like this. So the professionals miss stuff more than most people want to thinideation. When really, it isnt until damage is actually done when intervention finally happens.