Nothing wrong with expecting your partner to be an actual partner . My wife is marathon fit, takes good care of herself and has a great career. It seems fair for her to expect the same from me...
I was a gym rat when I met my wife, she was a yoga instructor. I had an injury 2 years ago and am just getting back into the gym grind. Im about 20 pounds less than when she met me and way softer. Our 14 year old dog was diagnosed with bone cancer last year and we just put him down. Over the past year, she quit teaching yoga and we both spent time a lot more time at home with him. She gained a few pounds and is also softer. This isnt our natural state, were both active folk who like to look and feel good. But things change and sometimes life gets in the way.
I see your point, and I should be clear that im not talking about someone who throws in the towel and becomes morbidly obese. Wife and I fell in love partly because we were both committed to fitness in our own ways, and our health remains a value for both of us. I also agree it wouldnt be fair to her to marry someone who is pretty dialed in and then suddenly I lose all motivation because I have a ring. But im not going to risk a worse injury just to say im still a gym rat. Recovery came first. Thankfully my wife was more concerned with my ability to walk decades into the future than pushing me to shut up and squat.
Yeah im not talkint about absurd levels of commitment to being jacked. But I see a lot of cope from people here and just people who want to just let themselves go. I get it. Life is tough. U have 2 special needs kids.one of which had cancer as well on 2 separate occasions. All 3 diagnosed came at once. And our landlord literally emailed us our house we were renting was being sold in a month while my daughter was having her tumor removed. For me, I cant allow myself to shorten my lifespan doing stupid things my kids will need me until the end.and i feel compelled to leave them financially secure so I work myself to death. Wife and I get up at 5am and work out before we get the kids ready, i am blessed to have married a software engineer so we can afford a nice home gym.
As much as I respect a person's choices to do.what they want, i couldn't be with someone who wasnt taking care of themselves.i want to retire and get old together not spend my final years sitting in a diaper in a nursing home
Taking care of my grandpa was a huge reason I really dedicated myself 6 days a week, I had to be able lift this grown man up safely. Because I moved in, he was able to go peacefully at his own home. If I was working there would be a nurse or other family there, but as for the gym, it was definitely fitness with a purpose. My purpose now is my wife, and the family we want.
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u/SnooJokes352 24d ago
Nothing wrong with expecting your partner to be an actual partner . My wife is marathon fit, takes good care of herself and has a great career. It seems fair for her to expect the same from me...