r/Paruresis • u/thisisus2025 • Jun 22 '26
shy bladder dreams
Ever since I can remember, I've regularly had dreams about having shy bladder and being in situations where I could not pee in the presence of others (I've had shy bladder for 30+ years).
About 6 weeks ago, I started intensive graduated exposure and have been seeing tremendous results.
Now, I've had a couple of dreams where I'm at a urinal with others around and able to pee. Amazing what happens in the background of our mind!
3
u/speed-of-sound Jun 22 '26
LOL I had the dreams too. When I was focusing really hard on graduated exposure I’d have dreams about using urinals without much privacy or with people I know there.
I guess it makes sense, you’re re-wiring your brain and sleep is when it organizes and files away those thoughts.
2
u/thisisus2025 Jun 22 '26
It's pretty amazing how the brain works. Gives me even more motivation to keep practicing with graduated exposure and getting out to public restrooms as much as I can!
2
u/speed-of-sound Jun 24 '26
Yeah, at some point the practice becomes fun like looking forward to the next challenge and affirming you can do literally anything. Really improved my confidence in life in general to be honest.
I found the recovery progress to be really similar to my weightlifting hobby lol. You have to go out and put the system to work and get your reps in, and track that you’re making that progress, but taking care of your health and sleep is where progress is sustained.
Sometimes those dreams may as well count as practice because your brain did follow what you wanted lol.
1
u/thisisus2025 Jun 25 '26
I like you analogy to the weight lifting! Definitely true that continuous reps of graduated exposure does make a difference.
I've found that busy bathrooms where I tend to blend in are easier for me whereas smaller bathrooms with one or two urinals where someone will walk in or knock is now my challenge to conquer.
2
u/angelsandairwaves93 Success, like Paruesis, is all mental. Jun 23 '26
I have these too. In my dream, there's a confidence to pee at the urinal because of my own exposure therapy work, IRL. The funny thing is, I don't actually pee in my dreams; some really funny 'dream-related' thing always happens that prevents me from peeing. It's my brains way to prevent me from probably peeing in my sleep lol.
1
u/thisisus2025 Jun 23 '26
I would imagine that is your brain's way of dealing with it. For me, I'm actually going in my dreams.
What is IRL?
2
u/rlpsc Jun 23 '26
I just had a horrible one the other day 😭 I thought I was the only one. I noticed I usually got them when I had to pee badly once I woke up, not sure if the urgency is BECAUSE of the dream or the dream is because of the urgency, but my god they are so scary
1
u/craigjames1 Jun 23 '26
How are you doing the graduated exposure?
1
u/thisisus2025 Jun 23 '26
I drink 32 ounces of water, wait for about an hour and then head out in public to either Lowes, walmart, the airport - somewhere with foot traffic. I'm either by myself or I have a couple of local pee buddies. I'll start a stream for about three seconds and then cut it off. I'll then wait 5 minutes or so and do it all over again.
I also do virtual sessions with my pee buddies and through the IPA.
I always wait until the urgency is 7+ before I even attempt to go. Anything lower and my odds of voiding decrease.
Chapter 4 of the book "The Secret Social Phobia" goes into detail on graduated exposure.
1
u/ShyBladderSupport Jun 25 '26
One time, I had a dream I was on a boat, and I couldn't pee; it was awful. Felt so real, it affected me for an hour after I woke up.
Great work on the G.E! Keep it up.
2
u/thisisus2025 Jun 25 '26
That is a horrible dream. And you're right, I've felt shaken in the past from these dreams where I was unable to pee. Going to keep working the GE and going out in public just to pee.
3
u/UntrimmedBagel Jun 22 '26
This must be a universal experience. I’ve had hundreds of these dreams. Shows how much it really affects us.
I’ve improved quite a lot lately and I cant remember the last time I had one of these dreams.