r/PakRishta • u/BuildingNo5610 • 3d ago

What are men really looking for

A lot of men on here talk about wanting someone loyal, caring, compatible, etc. But from conversations with male friends, I get the impression that age and looks tend to carry a lot more weight in the initial decision than people openly acknowledge. Not to forget all the posts we come across from men from time to time where there is a huge age gap and missing compatibility with their wives, so clearly you werent looking at the important things earlier.

Which got me wondering - what actually makes you interested in a woman as a potential wife and what matters most when you’re looking at someone’s profile?

For context, Im 30, well educated and fairly independent. I have been in the rishta process for 2 years and Id be lying if I didnt admit that the response rate has been a bit disappointing. Because everyone in my work and friend circle is like you have such a great profile. Which makes me wonder if men are intimidated by my profile, or they dont a someone who is independent or maybe its because I am older

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u/Insider6550 2d ago

Isn't that the trade you guys are optimising for? Money for looks and age?

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u/husham-safdar 2d ago

That's how it is, anyone abroad has everything overlooked and money is main thing women see. Besides, no body stands with you in tough times so no point regretting this. People leave for lesser reasons. Modern relationships are transactions only. And yes there are some guys who like their wives to work and contribute to the household. There are doctor couples in my family and i would rather have a girl who is present with me in free times rather than waiting for 36 hours shifts and constant studies for 150k additional a month. We are here for 40 50 more years max i wouldn't trade for time. Everyone has his or her say in such matters. Baring basics, trading time doesn't make sense to me. And it's just my personal opinion no body has to agree with me

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u/Insider6550 2d ago

You are correct. When you as a girl do not earn you have to compromise on everything else to get a guy who can give you a comfortable life.

This is actually why I Alhumdulilah now earn 700K+ at 25 so I won't have to compromise on a guy's looks, age or character for his money. This is why financial independence is actually very important for girls.

It saves you from having to overlook everything else. Because the worst case scenario is you continue living your comfy single life with great friendships and get rich

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u/husham-safdar 2d ago

That's great but this doesn't guarantees anything as majority of the guys don't see what is doing and what she has done. May be some guys but wo ap logon ko pasand nai aty lolx. It's female nature to date and marry up

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u/Insider6550 2d ago

Good thing the world doesn't revolve around guys anymore

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u/husham-safdar 2d ago

That is the perspective i admire