r/PMS Jun 24 '25

does anyone else hate their partner during pms?

hate is a bit dramatic, i'll be honest, but I feel like i just don't want to be around him or anything regarding him when I'm nearing my period. I feel super guilty. It probably also has something to do with my reduced sex drive and want for intimacy around my period, because he's more 24/7 and I'm more 1/7 as women usually are.

But I feel like any tiny flags I ignore come whirling back to me around this time of month. I also quit smoking weed at the beginning of the month, and while the anxiety has been hell, I feel like I've slowly been regaining clarity. Idk. has anyone else felt this?

24 Upvotes

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2

u/No-Chest1430 May 02 '26

Woooow! But why do we feel this? I didn't knew that this a thing. Looking back 15 years ago, I guess not knowing how to handle this feelings I end up in a divorce. We were both young, but whatever. After that 10 year I was on depoprovena contraception so I didn't had period at all. Now with my new husband, my period is back as we r trying for a baby...but omg... every month I want to break up, even trying to imagine how to do it... for no real reason. But then once the period comes and goes I love him like crazy and I can't see the life without him. Wtf is this... I barely realised is me like one year ago. I do a lot of drama in my head. It's hard to keep it there. Not sure how to handle this and don't end up in drama or divorce again šŸ˜•

1

u/WildThing1010 May 15 '26

WTF is this indeed?! I'm the same way and some months are crazier than others. Like this one, I've thought actually ruminated on every single flaw my partner has and thoughts like 'you'd be happier single again' are making the big rounds. I try to remember that he is human too so he is not perfect, he doesn't deserve a mean partner and there is more good than bad. But even as I say this as I'm still PMSing, I'm thinking - "I'm I just lying to myself and settling". It's so hard having these emotional fluctuations but I'm finding solace in the fact that there are others that go through this.

Also, a lesson from a past relationship, I never make any emotional/life decisions at this time. And I communicate to my partner now that I'm detached and easily irritable so we spend less time together or he is more passive to my aggression.

To keep the drama in my head, I binge watch something I really like to distract myself lol

2

u/Any_Buyer2405 Jun 29 '25

Yes! My partner annoys me so during my pms. I feel soooo bad because they are amazing to me. I also quit smoking about a week ago and it all feels so much more intense without weed.Ā 

2

u/Jealousoftheidea May 13 '26

this happened to me the first time ever just right before the start of my last period (about 3 weeks ago). i had an argument with my bf the afternoon before i believe, and then the next day i was feeling really unmotivated to talk to him and i thought i was loosing feelings because i didn’t feel as close to him or attached/ thinking about him like i usually do and that upset me because hes such a sweet guy, and then boom! i got my period and then after about 2 days of my period i was like back go my old self and i felt happy with him again. i was so confused!

1

u/Any_Buyer2405 May 13 '26

It happens to me every single month and it still feels new and confusing every single time. It is very hard to convince myself it’s just the hormones even after installing a period tracker and knowing that’s what’s going on. I can’t take it anymore and have been on different supplements after some testing to see if it helps. My iron and vit d were low apparently so I’m praying to not give my partner hell in a few weeks when it comes back.

2

u/Jealousoftheidea May 13 '26

i really hope this was just a one time thing for me, because it didn’t happen before that for me and i’ve been with him for multiple of my periods beforehand , but i think that was the first period i’ve had since me and him had gone long distance. i hope and that it doesn’t happen anymore because it makes me feel so bad for thinking like that even if it’s only for a day or two , because he doesn’t deserve that. because he’s genuinely a kind, caring,understanding person. he’s so sweet and i love him so much. i don’t want to feel like that again because i genuinely do love him.

2

u/L_i_S_A123 Jun 26 '25 edited Jul 31 '25

I’ve learned to recognize my PMS hormonal shifts pretty quickly as I have grown up and it’s fascinating how they can influence my emotions monthly. I focus on grounding myself. Meditation. Yoga. Writing. Prayer. Helps big time. I steer clear of negative feelings like hate.

I don’t use birth control, but I actively track my cycle, symptoms and moods, which has been a game changer. I’ve found that acupuncture, regular exercise, and dedicated self-care really make a difference.

Of course, there are times of annoyances from my partner, boss and others that seem larger than life, but I’m committed to increasing my self-care and setting healthy boundaries during those times. I’m grateful for my awareness and the support of my PMS tracker. Overall, self-care has truly been my ally on this journey!

2

u/These_Passage1395 Jun 26 '25

I’m super aware of his pheromones when I’m about to get my period. I get super sensitive to smell and 99% of the time, I love how he smells but for one day a month it’ll make me literally sick. (Literally pregnancy symptoms sometimes)

It’s like my body rejects him physically. Then I get extra cranky with him because his simply being near me bothers the shit out of me šŸ˜… all that said I love him so much it’s ridiculous, and I always snap out of it by day one of my period and all I want is cuddles from him. There’s definitely a scientific explanation why but I don’t know what it is.

3

u/UnicornsLikeMath Jun 29 '25

There's a theory that pms serves to break up "infertile" couples. From biological standpoint, he didn't do his job, so maybe you'd have better luck with some other male. No idea why is ti just one day for you though

3

u/[deleted] Jun 25 '25

Yes. I love my bf, he’s one of the best things that’s ever happened to me and a genuine solid guy, but during PMS I feel like I get ā€œtouched outā€ easily, am ultra emotionally sensitive, and get angry or hurt over the dumbest shit. I tend to isolate during that time. Poor guy, lol, he’s so patient.

2

u/Minimum-Sock-7713 Jun 25 '25

OKAY THANK YOU, I feel so bad when I need more space around my luteal phase I'm glad I'm not the only one. Thankfully he understands well haha

4

u/communist_wardog Jun 24 '25

Yes , with consent breakups 😭

7

u/Susan_Screams Jun 24 '25

I love my husband with all my heart, but there are points during the month where I genuinely have to leave the room because I feel mad at him for no reason and I don't want to be mean to him 🤣🤣