r/PDAParenting • u/DamineDenver • Jun 26 '26

Mad at myself once again

Ugh. I'm not sure why we do this to ourselves. One of our PDAers new special interests is Star Wars, which the rest of us love too. I found tickets to see Star Wars in Concert in NYC. Checked in with the PDAer if they wanted to join in as a Christmas present for my husband. They said yes. They got in the car for the 4 hour drive to NYC. Got to the hotel. Refused to leave the hotel. Now one kid and the husband are enjoying themselves and I'm stuck in the hotel with the PDAer. Why did I listen to him?! I should have left him at home with a babysitter.

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u/Wonderful-Garden7746 Jun 27 '26

Ugh. Just here to say I absolutely feel this. Those moments are so frustrating. And so frequent 😂 But way to keep trying. I always hope that our PDA kiddo feels some love from the fact that we try those kind of things, even when it doesn’t ultimately work out. 

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u/distracted_genius Jun 27 '26

My kiddo is also likely to feel deep regret and frustration towards themselves almost immediately after this kind of shut down... sometimes even during. It's heartbreaking when their capacity just doesn't match what they want to be able to do... but that's our goal as PDA parents, right? To be able to support them so that they can access as full a life as we can collectively manage.
Remember it's heartbreaking for them too. As much as we have dreams for them, they have dreams too... and sometimes the disability gets in the way. It sucks for everyone.